PE "Premature Ejaculation"...

RWG, thanks for your reply! Lots of people I know think I should be cruel and vindictive to my former spouse and my ex-fiancee, and teach them both a “good lesson” for how they treated me. I understand their point of view, but my own personal inner peace is more important to me than “getting even” with people who have hurt me. I still care about both of them. I just want to avoid any more entanglements with them. To be honest with you, I feel sorry for both the ex-spouse and former fiancee. In each case, I literally gave it all I had before calling it quits. I think I’m a pretty decent catch (lol), and it’s their loss. ;) I wish one of those relationships had worked out, but I think it just wasn’t meant to be.

Yeah, it’s awful when someone you love cheats on you! And, it’s horrifying when you lose your ability to perform for more than a “cameo” appearance. :chuckle: The first time I was with my fiancee after the cheating episode had been “resolved”, I felt like I had been reduced to less than a man by her actions and my subsequent inability to perform. It’s hard to imagine how a man could feel any lower than that!

Like you, I am on a two-year PE program. I am just coming up on the two-month mark of serious PE’ing. Due to a 10-day layoff for a non-PE related injury, I may not have a good report this month. Hopefully I have gained something (or at least not LOST what I gain in November!). I measure again on the 30th, so we shall see.

Good luck with your gains…and more importantly with your marriage!!! :up:

bigjack

Good on you mate! Im happy 2 see u overcome your problem!

But what did you do with the bloke who was with your wife having the affiar?? did u bash the fuk out of him or what??

Hardly his fault. Really, I don’t blame him at all. The way I see it I didn’t marry him, I married my wife.. Water under the bridge the way I see it… I have forgiven her in total for the affair.. The only issue I have now is my wife still will not let me rate sexual favors she let the other guy rate… Perhaps after I start fucking other girls that I’m attracted to I will have less of a problem looking at a divorce…

RWG, I assume you’re referring to the anal you mentioned earlier. Do you think that your 6.5” of girth scares the shit out of her, pun intended :)

I have no idea what your relationship is like with your wife, but if this is the case, do you think you can talk to her and assure her it hasn’t hurt girls you’ve been with in the past, and in fact was some of the best sex they ever had (I’m referencing your ass killa story of awhile back), and that you know how to take your time so that it’s all pleasure and no pain? Or do you think this will scare her off more?

I really hope she comes through with this for you at some point in the future. Best of luck.

RB,

Hmmmm??? I guess any man who has suffered through his wife having an affair would feel insecure about *how* his wife views him sexually. This is exactly where I am and yes, you are correct with your statement about anal sex…

I knew my wife had anal sex with the guy she cheated on me with which made me feel like my wife was sexually attracted to the other guy significantly more then me.. My whole fear with this thing *is not* that my wife had sex with someone else it’s that “I don’t turn her on anymore”… I’m sure you understand the logic chain of : “If A = B and B = C, then A = C”….

My wife has always said that the reason she would not let me have anal sex with her was because my penis was to big for her in that area. After the affair I asked her specific questions and found that “SHE EXPERIENCED EVERYTHING NEGATIVE ABOUT ANAL SEX WITH THE OTHER GUY AS SHE DID WITH ME”, i.e. pain / urge to go to the bathroom, etc…

I bought a ‘tiny’ dildo not much thicker then my finger and within an inch of it going into her ass she copt an attitude, got pissed and was disgusted… This fact by default means that if my penis was the size of my finger I still would not rate anal sex with my wife.. If I can show that my wife is willing to have anal sex with someone else and the size of my penis *IS NOT A FACTOR* then I can conclude that my wife is not sexually attracted to me. If A = B and B = C, then A = C!

When I pushed my wife to answer this question about why she would allow the other guy to do it she said “I DON”T KNOW”.. A week after thinking about it she said the reason was because it didn’t “HURT AS MUCH”… I’m banking on the fact that the guy she slept with was @ least as large as me, or larger. I get the feeling that I rate less and after nine months it feel like the other guy is living in our condo and sleeping in my bed…

She maintains that the guy had a “small dick” and from what I could read, he was insecure about me and had trouble in getting it up.. Perhaps my wife is telling the whole truth and perhaps she isn’t.. The only way I would know for sure is if I could see the guy with an errection… I could care less if the guy is bigger then me but if he was and my wife was willing to grant him favors then I do not rate then my wifes sexual problems need help or I need to cut bait because it would happen again..

We are going to see a counselor this Saturday and I emailed her a long letter… IF ya want I would PM it to ya for your input… I want to believe my wife but the test with the small dildo was devastating to me to say the least…

I know in your state of mind the dildo test had to be devastating, but I don’t think you can totally draw the conclusion you did. My wife wouldn’t let me touch her anywhere with any size dildo, as “those are for perverts”, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t want me to dick the hell out of her…

I think the counseling thing is a great idea if you both are still committed to each other and want things to work out. Be honest and don’t hold anything back. It’s funny how in the presence of an unbiased 3rd party, we hear things differently… I doubt your interpretation of her reaction to the dildo is correct.

I sent you a pm with some other thoughts… keep your chin up.

Thanks RB, this whole thing has been very hard for me to deal with… I so much hope you are right.. I”m gonna read your PM now.. Thanks again..

That’s awesome. I’m happy for you and your wife! I’m no minute man, I guess I’m about average when it comes to.. Well cum. Ha! But I’m doing kegels now, so that should help take care of my problem (though I don’t consider it a problem really) Also, congratulations on being so well endowed! That’s really awesome, plus you’re even making gains from the exercises! Congratulations once again.

Luka

It’s all good now luka, it was a long hard learning process but I’m a better man for doing it… Thanks for the back pats… I even forgot about this thread..

RWG

RWG—- So IF I am reading this thread correctly, you are saying that you have conquered your PrematureE problems? I’ve noticed that for me, myself, I have been fighting it off and on for a few years now. Some days I could pump her (well when I had her) for 30 minutes without loosing it and then others (more often then not) I would go for about 5 minutes and then blow it in her. I have been using a self hypnosis cd set for a few months now and I really don’t see an improvement. It doesn’t help that I have only gotten laid once since last June I’m sure. I’ve really been thinking aobut the accupuncture thing…and your posts/thread REALLY have me interested in it. The only problem is that due to the financial situation I am in, laid oof and back in college FULL TIME, there is no way possible to go to your accupuncturist and being in Michigan I have no idea where to look. Any suggestions on a path or two that I might take? It sounds like you have found the key for youself….now I need to find mine. Thanks in advance.

mr_e1974,

For the most part I’ve defeated the dragon… There are still times when I go faster then I want but I no longer shoot in a couple of seconds like I used to. I’ve heard many people suggest that premature ejaculation is mainly mental, early training to nut fast before you get caught.. More then likely there is truth to this…

There are things that can improve your lasting and for me the 1st thing I noticed was the harder I would get prior to sex the longer I lasted. Making sure you are at max erection previous to having sex makes a significant difference and I believe that manual and pumping forms of PE are a solid means to a stronger, harder erection.. Those who have followed my efforts over the years know that I have not gained much in the way of size but for me being able to make love and fuck my wife to the point where she does not want it anymore was a mighty gift and for that alone all the time was worth it…

Accupuncturist are numerous in Seattle and I’m sorry that they seem to be scarce in Michigan… I would suggest looking where they are lots of Asians for starters beings that they seem to have started the whole thing.. A little street beating might pay off.. You can beat this monster. If I could anyone could.

RWG

There is good news for men who suffer from PE. Several drug companies are actively working on medications specific to this problem which, btw, will not be SSRI antidepressants. If I remember correctly, Johnson & Johnson has probably the first shot at entry into this field and is close to clinical trials, if not already doing them. I’ll try to find again what I read this week on this. Somebody remind me if I don’t do that.

Premature ejaculation is the most common sexual dysfunction.

In any locker room where guys are boasting about getting laid a lot, you can trust that a significant precentage of them are getting laid very quickly; they just aren’t mentioning that part.

Now that is some good news Avocet8!

RWG

regularwhiteguy:

“After the first few workouts I noticed a big improvement in my erection quality and I did last longer, the first time I had sex after doing the exercises I actually hit 4 minutes which was something so new to me I damn near cried! I really hit the exercises and got to the point I was lasting 10 and even to the point my wife would tell me to hurry up because she was getting sore, I was estatic to say the least… To my horror it seemed that my dick got used to the exercises and started to fight the urge to cum again but even so I was so far ahead of where I started from I only got a little depressed… “

do you remember where you found those exercises, or what they told you to do?

you’re story is incredible and it brings hope to people with P.E. problems. congratulations on how well everything went.

By exercises I mean manual PE… My Doctor 1st told me about doing a form of exercises similar to edging and in searching the internet for cures for premature ejaculation (PE for short) I stumbled onto PEforum.net, from there I moved here…

RWG