a little depressed - honest opinion please

Thanks guys for all your advice. It means a lot to me.

Superchill,

I hope I don’t get too long-winded with this reply, but you and I are in almost exactly the same predicament. I’m 23, obsessed with my dick size (or lack thereof), and I’ve never been in a serious relationship. I’ve always been pretty sociable and had plenty of dude friends, but I’m still incredibly awkward around girls, often to comic effect (it actually isn’t that funny to me). The sexual tension clouds my brain and I get all mixed up. Through exposure in college, I’ve gotten a lot better about being comfortable in mixed company, carrying playful conversation with girls, making them laugh, etc, but whenever things progress toward any king of sexual intimacy I back off. I’ve come to realize this is entirely my own issue, and it’s probably an irrational one.

I just measured my BPEL today, and it’s a little shy of 5.5”, which by all accounts is within the normal range. Unfortunately, my ego is a lot bigger than that, and I have this recurring fear that I’m going to be humiliated by the first girl I bed. You know that sports cliche that you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take? Well, I’m worried I’ll airball the first shot and run out of the gym. I don’t deal with rejection well, which again is a psychological issue and a symptom of an inflated ego. I’m always amazed at people that can get dissed and dismissed by a girl they’re interested in and just shrug it off like it’s her problem (as it truly is). Those people are the real heroes.

So I’m with you in this battle, and I think it has to be fought on two fronts: grow your dick and shrink your ego. Frankly, I’ve decided the latter is more important for long-term happiness. If I happen to meet a girl that I love and feel comfortable with before my PE goals are reached, then I still want to be able to put my own hangups aside and move forward with it. I don’t think there’s any point in putting a five-year hiatus on meeting girls while you do PE. I might not have felt comfortable enough with a specific girl to have sex (AKA put all my insecurities on the table) up to this point, but I definitely don’t regret talking to girls and finding out what they’re all about on a non-sexual level. That’s good relationship prep that you’d be missing out on if you just kept your distance.

Regarding PE itself, I lurked on this board for a while a few years ago, but I never seriously committed to PE for fear that it wouldn’t work and I’d be stuck with what I’ve got forever. I finally figured out that I’ve got nothing to lose by doing this. I think I’m mature enough at this age to take it seriously without getting obsessed and letting it take over my life. We live in an increasingly superficial culture that makes it easy for sensitive people to feel insecure about their perceived flaws. I want to work on those flaws without buying into the superficiality. In a weirdly counterintuitive way, I think walking around with a bigger rod goes hand in hand with shrinking my ego and image-consciousness. I just want the confidence and peace of mind to be myself wherever I go and not have to worry about pleasing people or overcompensating. I can definitely relate to what you’re going through.

So, to make a long story short, you’ve got an ally in the fight. Good luck, man. I hope you find what you’re looking for.

PiP

Amazing post men, just amazing.

Mr Chill:

You are far from the smallest man on this forum, you are just one of the smaller ones that had the balls to post. Most smaller men like me are ashamed of being born this way, the bigger boys get all the ‘Thunder’, (Boy I hope this is Okay in pun) with their big units.

I am also 5.5 BPEL, in the small side of average. I am also following a man that was an estimated 8.5x6, it a tough act to follow physiologically, but it can be done with your physical anatomy. I am living proof that bigger is not ALWAYS better. I am as ‘big’ as my lady’s Ex in other ways.

Imho, the penis is not the biggest sexual organ that any man has, no matter what size he is. It his brain. It has worked for me, it can for you as well. Take heart in what has already been said here, it is valuable advise.

I would be willing to bet that there are hundreds of men reading this feeling similar to what your are for no reason other than their minds are playing tricks on them. Don’t let that happen to you, my friend!!

I will be your ally as well, I’m on your side.

The spirit of the people on thunder´s is so incredible, you guys rock!!!

Always wanting to help others, I´m so glad to have found this site :) .

For me I do not tie my confidence to my penis size
It’s tied to something else (not going to discuses)
I Can not feel psychological pleasure. Example: Porn does nothing for me at all.

I also consider my skin to be the biggest sexual organ for me…
As my skin has high sensitivity in a good way. guess it’s compensating for the loss of psychological pleasure.

even my nipples are very sensitive feels just as good as my frenum does

Being gay, I see it from two perspectives.

As a man, I want to walk into a room - any room - and KNOW that I’ve got the biggest dick in that room.

But as a GAY man, it just doesn’t matter at all. It’s the overall package that’s important. The body, the face, the personality. If I had the option of being with a funny, good-natured, good-looking guy with a 5-inch cock, or some ugly fat mess with a bad personality and a 12-incher, I’d choose the first guy every single time.

And 5 inches is a perfectly good size. The only issue with penis size would be if it was so small that it made sex difficult, or it just looked completely out of proportion with the rest of the body. But at 5 inches, unless you’re 8 feet tall, you really don’t have to worry about either of those.

So just get on with it. You’re in the prime of your life and you’ve got absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.

Dude, get yourself a girlfriend for a year or so in order to gain some invaluable sexual experience. Meanwhile, do some PE. Namely, to help your girth out, do some light pumping. Maybe 3-4 HG’s for 20 minutes or so daily. Learn how to use your tongue and don’t feel bad about it— it doesn’t matter if your dick is 9x6, the tongue is still the superior sex organ and you can make women go CRAZY with it even if you don’t have a dick. Why do you think women get off on other women so much??? Guys are obsessed with the dick when really it isn’t about the dick. No matter how big a guy’s dick is, it is never the magical sex organ that he imagines it to be! There’s a good book called Lesbian Sex Secrets for Men (I think that’s the title). Go find it on Amazon.com!

If you want a gay guy’s *honest* opinion on your appearance, feel free to send me some self-pics, baby ;-) I’ll let you know the score.

superchill, there is little left to add to the previous great posts. So I’ll repeat what already was said countless times on this PE forum: most girls don’t care at all about dick size, or have it buried deep at the bottom of their priority list! There are little chances to be rejected on matter of size; if that happens though, it means you’ve chosen a shallow one and she’s not worth dealing with…
Go ahead and find a girl, leaving behind this unfounded inhibition! If she falls in love with you, she’ll love you as a whole.
You may also do PE for your own, but that is secondary and by no means it’s a must for having a girl!

Just a short funny story that happened to me, supporting what has been said:

Recently, after I’ve crafted a re-sized dick thanks to Thunders, I decided to test it in the real (and wild) world. I went for an announcement on the web of a woman looking just for sex. It’s the kind of woman you expect to care a lot about size and that was exactly what I wanted for a real test. At the first date we had the surprise to find out that we use to go to the same gym. She’s a gym freak, going there on an almost daily basis. Very athletic build, you might imagine!
All went well on that first date, but big surprise at the end: she said we might not be compatible physically! As she is taller than me (and even slightly heavier), the first thing crossing my mind was “yet another woman who thinks height is an indicator of dick size!”. I instantly replied smiling that the missing inches from my height were added to another body part… I looked into her eyes waiting for her reaction, which came instantly:
- You’ve misunderstand me! I don’t care about the size of your penis, I don’t care if you have a penis at all. I was thinking if you would agree to give oral!

Hey man, I’m going to try and top your story. I have a dick that varies between 4-4.5” EL, and so so girth. It looks small, although after doing PE for a while, it seems to look bigger, although the ruler is saying otherwise. Fuck the ruler. I also have a larger concern than my small penis. Lol. That is I was also born with a thing called hypospadias, which is where the urethra doesn’t develop during the womb, so the Doc’s have to pull the foreskin over your penis to create a kind of canvas which forms a urethra. However, over the years, it fucked up, and looked like a red, raw, scraggly hunk of deformed veiny skin on my cock. I’ve recently gone through 2 operations to have it refixed properly, the first of which left my dick as a split sausage when they removed the ‘canvas’. No joke. And I was doing PE at first, because I hoped it would not only get bigger, but stretch the loose skin so it looked more normal.

Anyway, I have grown up with sexual inhibitions, naturally, but as I got older, I’m 22 now, I’ve begun to stop giving a fuck. It’s looking better, but it’s still small, and I’m sticking at PE too. One thing guys always say on the internet is ‘When you meet a girl who loves you, it won’t matter’ and ‘You can use your hands and tongue to satisfy her’ etc etc. Yeah, thanks guys, that’s exactly what every guy wants, to be a domesticated love puppy, who gives everything a girl wants by going down on her every night. Wrong. I don’t even like going down on girls. In fact, like most guys my age, I’m not really looking for ‘the one’, at least not really, I want to hook up with hot babes and have one night stands, have three ways and get head off drunk girls at parties. And I can. The first thing you need to do, is change your mentality, and for this I’d seriously recommend looking into the whole pick up scene, maybe read ‘the game’ by Neil Strauss. It’s the same kettle of fish we’re all eating from, except it actually helps you change your mentality from trying to play up to these standards we *think* women require of us, when in fact if you take the old saying ‘fuck it’ to heart, and start appreciating yourself, you’ll be able to be the best, and possibly most successful lover in the world.

Basically, don’t be a self made pussy. We all come here initially because we’ve had idea’s of masculinity shoved down our throats that have severely coerced our egos into doing PE, working out like mad, trying to sleep with as many women as possible, getting into pointless fights, etc etc. Liberate yourself from these idea’s, and in turn liberate yourself from yourself, and then you won’t sweat about this stuff. I’m not saying give up PE, but I’m saying do it for yourself, rather than stretching for five years and walking up to a women and saying ‘Is this good enough yet’? Women ARE NOT gods. Fuck it, they don’t even know what they want half the time. And at the same time, they are the most loving creatures you could ever meet, and that’s why we come together in these little online groups and try and win them over. My advice to you would be start doing the unthinkably scary things, such as trying to sleep with a women WITHOUT explaining yourself if you get her back to your place with ‘Oh, yeah, about my penis.’. Be bold, break your comfort zones, and walk into the fire, and feel brave afterwards. Remember, bravery only comes afterwards, everyone has to do the things that they fear whilst shitting themselves. But often less than five minutes in, the fear transcends to a dizzy rush of exhilaration and freedom, optimism and opportunity.

So yeah, voyage out of your safety zone, and embrace your life. Make the big dicked guys wish they had small dicks, so they could be like you. Remember dude, we’re all going to die someday, and there’s no such thing as seriousness in eternity, so live the life YOU want to live because NO ONE, and NOTHING has the power to tell you otherwise.

Thanks,

Dozed.

Hey superchill, I’ll chime in on what others have already said - DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT! Keep it up with PE, but in the meantime live your life!

I had a roommate when I was in my early twenties, he was a small guy in stature, and I don’t know exactly what his stats were, but he couldn’t have been more than 4” or 5” bp. I was so jealous of him, though, because he got more girls in a month than I’d get in a year! Also, once he had them, they kept coming back for more, they all seemed to fall in love! I’ve personally heard more than 1 girl say he was the best she’d ever had!

Good luck, man!

Superchill

Fall in love and have fun my friend. I have been married 13+ years. I learned a lot in those years. I have actually turned this marriage around to the point she ask/comes to me for sex 70% of the time.

Just always get her off first, regardless if its your dick, hands, or mouth. If you get her off before you have your fill you are setting yourself up for consistent sex.

Your like me and most members on this forum, regardless of what we grow our dicks to we are going to be chasing more. My NBPEL is now considerably longer then my starting BPEL and I’m still pulling, jeqling, stretching and hanging away.

Get in shape physically, never let yourself go, always get her off first, treat her with the up-most respect and keeping PEing my friend and you’ll be able to hold damn near any women who gives you a shot for life.

Find petite women or keep PEing and use your personality to attract wifey material women and be happy.

You gained half an inch which is really good. A woman that will care for you as an individual and want love will see a big cock as just a bonus. Their are things you can do if you feel like you have to make up for it.

1. Become a fantastic pussy eater (I recommend sticking your tongue in and out your mouth everyday for 30 seconds as fast as you can)

2. Gain more stamina (can be done by practicing edging)

3. Give good foreplay.

4. Use passion to create a more intense atomosphere.

5. Make her as comfortable as possible. Some girls are uneasy of their scent and how their bodies look. While doing foreplay and having intercourse giving them compliments on their smell and how attractive they look makes them hornier and more comfortable.

6. Aim for the gspot (This is a special spot that when rubbed upon can stimulate and give a girl an orgasm)

7. Multi-task when your having sex do more things then thrust into her. For an instance while making love gently rub her clitoris or fondle her boobs. Maybe even kiss her neck.

8. Explore her body. Every woman has different things that turn on and get them horny. Some women want to have their brains fucked out while other want it gentle and slow. Some want to be kissed while you fuck them and some don’t know what they want. Make it your role to exploit these weaknesses.

I guarantee if you follow some of my rules you will see that having a big dick is just a fraction to the equation of love making.

Believe in yourself and you will achieve your gains and in all become a better lover. Life is about more than having a huge dick! Find your own way for successful sex and good luck!

There are plenty of penis-less lesbians that can rock the world of another woman…think about that!