Hey there Jza27,
To vanquish a woody, do you squeeze under the head, you know, the area where the frenulum grows. Kills it for me. Another simple way to stifle a stiffy is to take two rough bricks to bed and therewith smack your wilful Willy between them. With the threats and curses that follow, you have a recipe for flaccidity. Usually does it for Cramer and the boys, Jza27. If this doesn’t work then attaching a binder clip to the head ought to do it. For those obnoxiously redundant hardons, an alligator clip works magic but that may be stepping to the curb side of extreme. Stick with the bricks, bud.
Oh, to have a hard so persistently hard. If you’re older than 40 get out a here. I think I’ll write an ode on the thought, “Ode to a Wilful Willy”.
My advice on shooting like a warrior, you’ll be amazed to hear, is just as poignant as my understanding of the workings of a persistent boner. As suggested by marinera, work on your kegel exercises and I would add, your anti-kegel exercises, religiously, and you should see results, I am sure. Also, try quick machine gun kegels whilst ejaculating and you should get some more distance. After eight weeks of strenuous kegels (I can crack walnuts with my BC muscles) and fewer using anti-kegels I added a metre to my fertile seizures. The other night I took out an eye, my own, not a lass’s, alas.
Seriously though, Dr Kegel is the unsung hero of Olympian ejaculatory virtuosity. Besides having a piece of the ass named after him, he has a reserved table at a Tim Hortons’ doughnut shop in Come By Chance, Newfoundland which has a picture, in gold leaf, of Dr Kegel showing off his BC muscle and with full instructions for it’s practical use and improvement. However, don’t pack your bags too quickly, boy, airfare from Anywhere, England ain’t cheap.
Good luck with those irritatingly persistent standing one-eyes. Sympathies will be pouring in from all across Thunder’s Place once word of your plight leaks out.