Mental Illness ED

I was doing jelqing pumping and traction about 6 years ago. From what I remember i was doing jelqing on the erect side of things because i could barely touch myself without getting an erection and I don’t think I was aware of the fact that erect jelqing should be avoided. I was getting really great results from jelqing. After about 2 years of jelqing i stopped and kept dabbling with pumping and traction. At the time I was with a girlfriend and I noticed my erections getting softer. I didn’t think too much of it and looking back I think I was slipping into depression, that could’ve been the cause. A few years later I had a bottle of wine with a girl at my place and I couldn’t get it up. It really scared me after that. My anxiety went through the roof and I couldn’t keep it up after that. I went to get a penile doppler ultrasound exam so i could learn what was going on with me. Before the exam i got a shot in my dick to induce an erection. As i was in the back tugging on my dick watching porn on my phone to get hard for the exam, things were not working. I felt like i was walking the blank, I couldn’t beat the softness out of my penis. The exam showed no fibrosis, no venous leak but some arterial deficiency( peak systolic velocity 20cm/sec). I have a history of depression and anxiety. After that things went downhill fast. I ended up in a full blown depressive episode with severe anxiety. Two years later i ended up on the psych ward for 3 months where I ended it up getting two rounds of ECT(electro convulsive therapy). Now two years later I’m still dealing with some mental issues and ED that really doesn’t help. I can’t help slipping into occasional devastation when I think that my jelqing stupidity has given me ED for the rest of my life. I know I’m not well mentally and have become very aware that mental health severely impacts erectile health. I read that chronic stress can permanently activate your sympathetic nervous system which would work against erections. I can’t get fully hard or stay hard and i don’t get nocturnal erections even with 5mg Cialis daily. I’ve seen 3 urologists and they all say i look fine even though my peak systolic velocity shows ED. Arterial blood flow being under 35cm/sec reflects that(mine is 20cm/sec). I know Dr. Google doesn’t have a medical license but from what i read on there it shows low Arterial blood flow.

I suffer from Bipolar disorder, this whole thing has really triggered bipolar depression.
Here are my questions. I read jelqing can give you fibrosis or venous leak which i apparently don’t have, but can it damage your arteries?
My second question is does anyone have experience with ED and mental illness? Have you had a mental health recovery that helped with ED?
Has anyone had Mental Health problems that abolished nocturnal erections?

Also FYI all 3 urologist didn’t seem to think jelqing can cause ED. But it seems experience guys says it can?

Good evening, I’m going through the forum looking for answers for a situation similar to yours: after a period of deep stress 6 years ago, I completely lost spontaneous and night erections, and I’m unresponsive to Cialis and Viagra. My erections are of very low quality.

My situation is slightly more complicated, since 15 years before (when I was 20) I went through penis straightening surgery, that didn’t cause me any problem for about 10 years. I lost 3cm but I was blessed with a 23cm penis in the beginning, so not a big issue.

I started doing some stretching (30min sessions with extender, for about two months) to improve the curvature when I was 30 yo, since even after 2 surgeries it was still there, but without big improvements, so I stopped. Meanwhile I was going through a time of very high stress, so my erections become first weak (stopped stretching immediately) and then also kind of painful. Pain recovered during time, the erection didn’t.

I completely lost night erections, but accord to medical exam both blood flow, blood hormone values, tyroyd, hypofisys. All is perfect.
I’m unresponsive to Viagra and Cialis, my erection is weak. I have been to many (more than 10) doctors, I tried every sort of therapy, including sessions of shockwaves and all kind of supplements, but it didn’t work. I went to the psychologist for half an year and it was just pointless, since I’m a very mentally stable person with deep self consciousness.

I tried long periods (weeks) of abstinence but it didn’t help, just made me nervous to don’t unload.

I’m out of ideas, I think my symptoms is of nervous origins and my stressful life and very stressful job fucked up my sympathetic system forever, just like you. Doctors WRONGLY prescribed me paroxetine and duloxetine to "relieve stress", but it just made me sleepy and weak, while I was looking for the opposite effect.

3 years ago I had one good girlfriend with deep sexual connection and sex was great, I was even recovering, until she decided to ghost me while we were planning the marriage. That definitely killed me.

I don’t want to resort to penile inflatable prothesis (I already had bad experiences with penis curvature correction surgery), I’m thinking about every possible way to restore my serotonin and adrenaline system, but doctors are not helping me. I even have been to the psychiatrist, begging for help, that didn’t come.

I’m so desperate that I’ll think I’ll try microdosing to try to reset my nervous system. I can’t be so hopeless and left alone at 35 :(