Y’know, reading the Captain’s story reminded me of a story an ex gf of mine who told me of shaved pubs, (she prefered them shaved, and she gave more bj’s as a result) and one of her old boyfriends. Anyway, she brought up the subject with him, as he had quite the bird’s nest down there. She even volunteered to cut and shave him—which he initially declined, but after a few minutes of subtle blinking and the cutest whispering, she convinced him that it was all for the greater good. So she gets the scissors and begins to trim, snip snip snip, all the while this big lug is staring on with saucer eyes, tensed and braced for impact, when disaster strikes.
She cut him.
She went down a little too close to the scrotum and snipped maybe a 2 cm slit in the baggy flesh. There was the barest of pauses, as she realized “Omigawd, I cut him,” while his eyes went even wider “OMIGAWD SHE CUT ME!!!”
The world then went upside down as he threw her off and raced for the bathroom as if his balls were afired. Apparently however, there was very little blood from the “little” boo-boo. Her words, not mine.
Needless to say, I declined her offer for her to mow around my own wildlife reserve, which I now do on a regular basis. And with regards to the nurse, good strategy on the hospital’s part to send in a nubile young thing to do the deed. If she snips flesh instead of hair, if harder to get upset… or run to the washroom.
Captn…you might have regretted it at the time, but I believe you were a VERY wise man to shave your peaches by yourself.
