A letter from a desperate guy who's looking for help from his fellows..

Hi there guys.

I’ve been a member for quite some time. I’ve been doing jelking and hanging on and off. I got some progress but because of work i just can’t find time anymore…

I’m writing to tell you a bit about me, my problem and the eventual solution(s). I know that there are some out there, but I need an opinion by someone who did it..

My problem …. I watch a lot of porn, I have low self esteem because my unit is not very big (6.4 bone pressed and not very thinck) and i have been masturbating for the past 12 years NON STOP, sometimes up to 5 times a day…

I was in a long relationship, the only way I could have sex was taking generic Tadalafil (which is what cialis is made of) in small drops in a drink, and having a headache and muscle aches… Imagine more than a year , just to maintain a good sex life.
2nd - I can only have sex WITHOUT a condom. If I put a condom I just cannot feel anything, and I lose my erection EVEN with Tadalafil (Cialis) …

I broke up with my EX… and found an amazing 19 year old girl (I’m 25) … she has the most amazing body on the planet, we’ve been fooling around and we tried having sex 2 nights ago… i was on Cialis (a lot of it) i had an errection (she performed some oral stuff on me) then I put the condom, penetrated her and …. I just lost my errection.. She was very wet, the condom made me feel NOTHING, it was really dark in the room so basically for my porn-oriented brain it was like I was sleeping…

To sum up, I’m a heavy masturbator, heavy porn user, can’t have sex without tadalafil, cannot maintain an errection even WITH tadalafil (cialis) and this is ruining my life. It is just ruining me , because I’m successfull in my studies and work, I’m a good looking guy but when a naked hot 19 year old girl in her panties hops on me I CAN’T get an instant erection…

When she was giving me oral pleasures, she did it really slowly and gently.. Because of the lack of vigurous activity I’d say, and because of the slow speed I started loosing my errection ON Tadalafil… I came to the concluson that, because I masturbate very very quickly by brain is used to extremely quick motions and can only maintain an errection with those quick motions/movements and the unit should be DRY… opposite to real sex, when there is sucking and everything is wet….

This is my sad sad story and this is my simple explanation for it.. at least this is how I explain it to myself.

LIGHT in the tunnel : She left for 16 days to see her parents and family in another country. I have 16 days to do something and try to change it so when we meet again I can have normal sex… I know that 16 days won’t fix it , but please PLEASE if anyone has been in the same situation share your story and help me opvercome this…. I’m extremely desperate…

To this forum and all it’s members : Thank you for existing..

Cheers.

- Drop the porn. Completely. CTRL-A and delete it.
- Start and stick with the newbie routine. Start gently, apply heat generously. Stop hanging for the time being.
- Keep a log while you’re at it. “Dear diary, measurements today are .. and # days of no porn.”
- You’ll find plenty of men all with varying sizes to suffer from the bloodstopping menace that is a condom.

Eat well, sleep well and find some sort of intellectual and/or bodily pursuit (Beyond marathon wanking). You could add simple breathing exercises before going to bed. Lay down on bed, put on a silly grin, in- and exhale deep and slowly. I find it helps with stress and helps winding down from a long day toiling around.

My issue with jelking is that every time I jelk, I get a boner (+ porn) and I have to ejaculate..

Another question - Won’t something happen to me if I don’t masturbate and don’t ejaculate at all for weeks and weeks ?

Cook , Domxz gave you excellent advice , Stop watching porn for the next 16 days start their and don’t masturbate and when she gets back your story will be different and that will encourage you that you can do this . If you think about it in the context of ” i can never ever masturbate or watch porn again ” you will probably fail . just make it 16 days and see how that works out for you. Then go from there. Your story will be different.

Yes something will happen to you, You will be able to have great sex very often with your lady friend

@plaidshirt I just don’t believe that. I just think that it will be harmful and unnatural and maybe harm my testicles ?

Seriously, can someone tell me what happens when you don’t ejaculate for let’s say 2 or 3 weeks ?

Your story sounds very familiar, although my hottie when I was your age was 24 years old. Going cold turkey for 16 days without porn or jerking off is definitely the right first step for you. It should help you cut out the cialis but it likely won’t magically make the condom insensitivity disappear. Bill Gates is publicly committing money to find a new condom because condoms plain suck for many people. From my first hand experience, this is what I would recommend for you:.

1. Quit binge masturbating and only masturbate when it’s truly an authentic sexual (non-porn) stimulation. We can force ourselves to watch porn, get hard and masturbate more than 5 times a day but it’s no better than watching a grossly obese individual binge eating junk food out of boredom, loneliness, stress, etc. and refusing to change their behavior.

2. If and when you do masturbate because you haven’t had sex in a while, use a Fleshlight instead of your hand. Better yet, use a Fleshlight with a condom on as well.

3. Not all condoms are the same. Try some of the better reviewed thin/sensitive ones that you can order online rather than just taking what’s on sale at the drug store.

4. As much as I enjoy PE, stop doing it until you have better control of your penis. Effective PE requires you to monitor your PIs and right now they’re saying go f*ck yourself”

5. If you take cialis, try to cut your dosage. When you don’t have a medical issue, a lower dosage may give youthe benefits without the side effects. You can buy a pill cutter at the drug store and take 1/4 of a pill.

Changing long established habits takes some time. A monogamous relationship with the right girl on the pill so that you don’t have to use condoms would be very helpful while you take these corrective steps. That’s what worked for me.

I am going to do this, I promise. But I still think to take a 1/2 cialis before meeting her in january. I just don’t trust myself…

Can I at least do like 150 jelqs every 2 days, because if I don’t masturbate/exercise, my unit kind of swrinks down. Apparently because if lack of testosterone I don’t get erections during the day and I pretty much don’t get any blood circulation down there so.. I need to at least force some blood, at least at the beginning ?

Any ideas of supplements, foods or activities, or even books I can read to do the “restart” faster ? I just want to do the optimal thing. I read all these wonderful things of people “rebooting” and that even changes their way of thinking etc..

I am so desperate, because I just felt powerless and we are talking here about an amazing 19 year old 115 lbs girl with the tightest ass on the face of the earth…. and I have to squeeze my cock at the base to maintain it hard enough :/

Have you been diagnosed as having a medical issue or are you just reading the boards looking for an excuse for erection issues? Your original post sounds like over-use and anxiety.

If you don’t have a medical issue and if you give up porn and masturbating for the next 16 days, I suspect you will start having spontaneous erections, especially at night, well before your girl returns. I can appreciate not wanting to mess up your new relationship but tend to think that 1/4 pill is enough. If you want to be careful, perhaps 1/4 pill the day before she returns and 1/4 pill the day of her return might help you find the right level that prevents the side effects. Your penis won’t fall off if you let it rest for 16 days so skip the PE until your normal erections return. Use your new found free time exercising instead of masturbating and your whole body, including your penis, will thank you.

Check out the origami condom Origami Condoms. I can’t vouch for it because I’ve never used one but it’s an interesting idea and you get to feel movement against your penis.

Other than that, I can’t offer better advice than that given.

I assume what has happened to you is dopamine receptor desensitization. It is very common. It is also referred to as porn induced erectile dis function. So at this point you need ask yourself whats more important masturbation and digital woman or sex with real woman. I’ve been in the exact same boat as you. I know how it feels dude. I’ve been struggling to stop looking at digital woman for about 8 months now. It has been the hardest challenge of my life. Also not masturbating will also help, and don’t worry about not lasting cause that’s better than not getting erect. One last bit of advice too much masturbation can cause mineral deficiency. I feel so much better when I take a calcium magnesium zinc supplement before bed. I have also noticed much more well being from drastically reducing masturbation frequency. There is hope dude just keep your chin up.

Stop beating off you moron. You can only get an erection when you masturbate because you wore your whole system out

My friendly advice

1. Break it off with the 19 year old. She’s 19 and she doesn’t need some guy who has self esteem issues and there is no fucking way you can love someone when you can’t love yourself.

2. Sort those issues and find a reason to love yourself

3. Fix those issues

4. Stop beating off 10 times a day. The death grip you have on your dick is frying any chance at having normal sex

5. Stop asking random people on the internet for advice. You’re not gonna take it anyway. You know what to do unless you’re mental or something, you’re just procrastinating

6. You’re not gonna do any of this anyway so stop crying you piece of shit and stay away from the 19 year olds. Those are for me and normal people who can handle themselves.

7. take a deep breath and pull your head out of your ass.

8. stop wasting everyone’s time

PS
everyone on here is too nice to say it
your welcome,

Some fucking guy

You already know the problem, the porn, just leave it or reduce it only for the PE sessions.

To answer your question about not ejaculating;
Short answer; no, not ejaculating isn’t going to impede anything. Stop porn, stop using to jelq with and simply start.

And while Jubbyrob’s answer was pretty colourful; he’s got a point. This is all in your hands now (Punnnnn).