Its Too Big!

>>> I feel you. Totally.

Please, don’t. ;)

I had a revealation today. I manipulated by flaccid dick to about 6”. I suppose it was around 5” girth too, at the time. I told her that this was the average erect size. She just said “You’re bigger than that…”

LOL! She has such sharp deductive skills! This is one of the many reasons I love her…

Either it doesn’t matter to her, or she really just does not fully comprehend the difference. I am getting over it. She came twice tonight, so I am content :D

I do know how you feel base. I’ve always made a point to tell my wife how sexy and beautiful she is at least a couple times a day. However, for the first couple of years we were together she wouldn’t reciprocate. Finally I asked and she gave me basically the same answer - she didn’t want to stroke my ego too much for fear I would get a big head and possibly go out looking for a better looking woman. It took me a while to talk her through this complex and reassure her that although I was a ‘guy’ I needed the compliments as well. Honesty and openness are necessities to a solid relationship, no matter what the topic. Without it there is no way I would be practicing my PE as openly as I do, as well as taking part in this forum.:)

Hey secjay - is it possible that size just doesn’t matter to your girl? What I mean is, size can be a relative thing. Your size obviously pleases her, so what does she care how it compares to the rest of the general population.

secjay: Yeah, all the way baby, there and back! Have you been working out? :D

APN: If I would start to talk to her like “You need to compliment me”, she would just turn it into a fight. Women are good in that. We’ve been together for couple of years now, you would think that it goes without saying that one needs positive feed back once in a while.
I guess she would see more point to it if I’d came out the PE closet, but I am not ready for that. Don’t know if I’ll ever be.

Maybe it is true; maybe she couldn’t give a crap what I am like, compared to others.

But, even if that is true 100%, there is always the compliment factor mentioned by others. We all like to be complimented. And when it’s all one sided, it seems a little unfair.

Not that somebody should expect to be complimented by giving out compliments, but well, thats what I mean.

APN, great post. I feel like I need a cold shower about now! :) That night is the stuff memories are made of.

APN and especially Base, I’ve experienced beyond what you guys have. The first ten years of my marriage were steamier than any Penthouse Forum could ever dream of. Sex on a fire tower 60 feet off the ground, sex on a rock overlooking Interstate 80 between Wendover, NV and Salt Lake City, UT, sex on a motorcycle, sex in haylofts, sex in a sleeping bag beneath a falls in a fjord in Northern Norway above the Artic Circle on a three week motorcycle tour. But the second ten years went considerably downhill. And this drove me crazy. At that time, I was pretty much out of shape and I made myself a promise to get into the best shape I could possibly get in. I thought this might be the problem. I was out of shape (not her) and we both were taking each other for granted. So started a whole new life of watching what I ate, doing free weights and running. And a good dose of PE. Over the next year I made a pretty amazing conversion. From 270 down to 200, packed on a lot of muscle and PE gave me some good gains. And throughout that conversion, my wife was right along side me doing the weights, cardio and laughing at my PE. The compliments improved but the sex wasn’t any better. Then I started obsessing trying to find out why her libido was so low. Everything else in the relationship was great. She didn’t have any trama in her childhood that might have caused it and her libido was the same in good times and in bad, tired or rested. It wasn’t our two wonderful kids either. So after reading about potential physical problems, I sat her down and we made an agreement to go to our respective doctors and get a full checkup. And whatever the outcome was, we made the agreement to follow it to the end. And she was sure my doctor was going to find that I had too much testosterone, but I knew better. Her doctor found that her testosterone levels were extremely low, almost zero. So to make a long story short, she got the shot and several weeks later she’s calling me from work saying she’s horny as hell and can’t wait for us to get home. A complete turnaround. We went from having sex maybe once or twice a month (basically charity fucks) to five times a week.

But even though the sex is great, there are still a few things that need fixing. I give her a lot of attention, affection and a little sexual grab-ass but I don’t get any in return. It shouldn’t be all one way. Don’t get me wrong, she’s very receptive now, I reach out and she’s there. But I’m hoping for a maybe 75-25 or 60-40 split rather than a 100-0 split. But from what I’m reading, this doesn’t have anything to do with anything medical. It is something that has to be learned. And it can have a lot to do with how she was raised. So we are working on it and making progress.

So I’m soaking up all I can on this right now. If I can get this fixed, I will feel like I’ve died and gone to heaven. Everything else is just wonderful. She’s a beautiful, caring and intelligent person and is a tiger in bed. I’ve just got to get her into the habit of reaching out to me.

And there is a great website on these kind of issues. The information there can make a good relationship absolutely great. We are all obviously interested in addressing our physical needs (PE, working out) and this site can help you address any emotional needs between the two of you as well. It’s worth a look and a bookmark. It’s called "The Marriage Builders" and the link to "How To Meet Emotional Needs" is http://www.marr iagebuilders.co … mbi5520_qa.html .

Take a look and the best of luck going forward with your efforts.

Hey guys,

We seem to be opening up a topic deserving of its own thread. I wish everyone the best of luck in working this thing out with their g/f, wives. It can be very depressing when you feel taken for granted. I say this from experience because although I have been sharing experiences from my relationship which are very positive, it wasn’t always so. About two years ago we came very close to separation. Basically I was being very stubborn and pig headed but luckily my wife loves me enough to talk me into seeking counseling. Well, we both learned a lot about ourselves and our interaction together. This specific topic of ego stroking came out and we both realized how important it is to a solid relationship. Now I’m not saying everybody needs to run out and get counseling, but don’t feel uncomfortable as a man for feeling the need to be complimented especially on a sexual level.

Carl - Thanks for posting your experience and congratulations on getting back in shape! A motorcycle, wow! I’d like to hear about that one. I’ve had a couple of BJ while driving in the car but damn, you’re living on the edge.

Carl,

What kind of test did your wife take to find out she had low testosterone levels? And how often does she have to get shots? Are they given by a doctor/nurse or can they be administered at home.

Did she go in for a general tests, or was the doctor specifically looking for reasons for a low sex drive.

Very intersting.

prolab7881,

>What kind of test did your wife take to find out she had low testosterone levels?

Her GYN did a blood test.

>And how often does she have to get shots?

Every three months. She had an option to take the daily pills, but opted for the shot to my surprise. The shot is given in her butt and it hurts like a SOB I’m told. As well, the dosage is well within the average testosterone levels for a female so she shouldn’t experience any of the side effects.

>Are they given by a doctor/nurse or can they be administered at home.

These are administered by the GYN’s office staff. I’m not aware of the shots being available for home use. And if it was, I probably wouldn’t do it out of fear she would take my head off when I gave it to her! :)

>Did she go in for a general tests, or was the doctor specifically looking for reasons for a low sex drive.

She had a full physical several months before, but they didn’t check her testosterone levels. She went to her GYN with the complaint that she felt tired a lot and her libido was very low.

>Very intersting.

Her GYN kind of rolled her eyes when she heard the “low libido” complaint and made an off-handed comment that all men think women should run around in crotchless panties. She said less than 20% of her patients are diagnosed with low testosterone levels. I remember feeling like I was doomed. The normal level of testosterone in a woman’s body is 20 to 25 ng/dl. My wife’s level was 2. Just for comparison, a guy’s testosterone level should be above 400 ng/dl.

But contrary to what her GYN said, I’m reading that low testosterone in women is a much more common problem than what was once thought.

The shot made a remarkable difference. Her energy level has picked up considerably. Sex is a 1000% better. As a result of the shot, she gets aroused a lot quicker. The way it was before, she need quite a bit of foreplay to prepare herself to take me on. Now her breathing and pulse increase, her nipples get hard, her vagina swells and opens up and shes gets very wet in very little time. And at that point she’s good to go! Since the shot I’ve seen her go from first touch to orgasm in three minutes with just my finger!! Varoom!!!!

Thanks for the reply. Wow! That is great. I hope things continue to go well for you and your wife.