Fact: People who never smoked die of cancer.
Conclusion: Not smoking causes cancer.
Just kidding, damn your eyes. Just as many smokers die as non-smokers.
How much longer must we suffer this all too familiar scene:
“Bob’s in the hospital…doesn’t look good.”
“What happened?”
“He sat down at a bar next to some maniac who was……”
“Who was what?!”
“I can’t…I…”
“What, damn you say it!”
“Smoking a cigarette!!”
“Oh my dear God! Poor Bob.”
“Crazy bastard. I’m gonna miss him.”