More energy, happier state of mind?

My god man, you’re describing my story exactly. I guess it’s probably not too uncommon an experience for late-adolescent boys. I’ve never experienced anything as intense as the desperation and sorrow I felt when she abandoned me. I got MAJORLY fucked up (and, like you, did some things that could have landed me in jail) and took three or four years to fully “recover.” If I ever did fully recover, which I’m not sure about…

Maxtro, KinXXXize’s words are wise. Being in a romantic relationship when you don’t have other social support is a recipe for emotional disaster of the highest order.

While prescription anti-dpressants are powerful, if the problem has bio-chemical roots there are a thousand things to tune up before resorting to them. They are dangerous and have permanent effects on your brain. Getting off them can be Hell. Each of the dick herbs that Max is taking has insomnia as a side effect, so stopping those is a place to start. As a 23 year old he has plenty of testosterone and sex drive, the problem is that he psychologically is blocked from expressing and fulfilling them. And that causes backed up energy that results in frustration and the need to explain it away. He needs to learn to fulfill that drive in a constructive way that jibes with his other positive values. I’d recommend manifesting some will, even if its against the inner self-talk which is mostly ego-protecting, self-serving, fearful mind chatter. Having a man (father) or men (male friends) around would prick, annoy, prod, shame or exemplify some action out of the boy. If I wasn’t pretty sure T’s was the only place he was getting some maleness I would recommend staying away from here for a long while. Unless you’re already well-situated mentally, focusing on your dick size this much is probably an expression of some warped inner shit that needs to be addressed directly or may soon cause it. Granted if your dick size is the ACTUAL problem then here’s the solution, but I suspect that this is extremely rare. But in truth getting maleness through a verbal/textual Web interface pales next to being aound it, in its raw glory and messy clumsiness. Maleness is NOT the idea of maleness like Sex is not the idea of sex.

Regarding the biochemical stuff, the simple answer is to go natural, the more complex one is to use the right supps and exercise. Right supps? Check out Seven Weeks to Emotional Healing by Joan Matthews-Larson. She takes an organized approach, but fix your diet first. Any of the carb moderate, protein adequate, nutrient wise diets will do. But I think just setting a goal and achieving it, any real "shape your world" goal will teach a young neophite testosterite alot about what makes him tick. Success is a very powerful anti-depressant for a male. It will lead to sex, another one.

Here’s that book:

http://www.amaz on.com/exec/obi … 7689309-6099008

Also check out Personal Ecology for Men by Mark Cunningham:

Damn rakishly it’s like you hit the nail on the head. How do you know so much?

I honestly thought I had lower testosterone and sex drive than normal. So it’s all in my head and that’s why I have the need to write about every detail of my life? Freaky. How do I manifest will? My self-talk was described perfectly. My dick size is an issue. No man would like the thought that he is below average. I’m under 6 inches. But it’s not that big of an issue because I have no problem or any embarrassment about it when I’m naked in front of a woman. Of course I wish it was bigger but I have more important issues. The only time I think about my size is when I hear or read about size being discussed.

I have little exposure to males, well more like everybody. Thunders is the only place where I have “contact” with grown men. I don’t talk to my father that much and I’d never tell him about what I’m going though. I know he cares but the way he shows it is to look down on me. I have a few male friends but I’m rarely around them. There are a couple of guys that I’m cool with at work but I don’t see any of them out of work. I don’t know how to be a “cool guy” and I’m not extroverted enough to invite any of them anywhere. I’d gladly go anywhere if invited. I want more male contact but I’m too proud or embarrassed to ask for it.

I’m going to research the books & cd’s.

To everybody that thinks having a girl won’t help,

I have had a “girlfriend” for a brief period of time and it really hurt when she left me. But what stung the most was that I never got to have sex with her and also the fact that I wasn’t able to replace her. There is no doubt that being able to have regular sex will do a lot to boost my self-esteem. There’s no doubt that physical intimacy with a woman will make a man feel good. And it felt so good to make out when I had a girl. In the brief moments of my life when I’m actually around a girl I want to be around I feel much better and the effect lasts a while after she’s gone. The major point is that I haven’t been in a serious relationship so its one of those things that I won’t find out about until I’ve done it.

Man, I’ve gone over this issue so many times here that I’m getting almost as sick over it as everybody else is. But when my life is so boring that I stay inside the house the whole fucking day all I can think about is how much I hate my life. I want to have fun but when I know hardly any people and have little money (enough to buy small things) my options are limited. As much as I hate staying inside everyday I’d rather do it than go someplace alone.

Para-Goomba I will never fully recover, I’m always comparing her with my new girlfriends or I’m questioning my self what I did wrong. Perhaps it’s just a lesson that you won’t forget. Thinking about it now, it doesn’t hurt but I still feel bad and the point is, I think it could happen again, one day. So I’m scared to love a girl that much, the fear of a deception is too big.

Maxtro I’m not a real extroverted guy but as soon as I get to know people and they start talking to me, everything’s that easy. Perhaps I was like you when I was 14 because I had a lot of problems in my family and it was kinda tough. But since then I always tried to change my self and now today everything’s cool. But look I’m with my gf for 30 months now and I think I got a crush on another girl. I feel bad and I feel just like you because I don’t know what to do, what to tell that other girl, the fear of rejection is too big.

I think the easiest way to change your life is, you have to know somebody who knows how to talk with people, stick with him, study him, and you will get to know more and more people.
BTW I would never go alone to a club or a bar, I always go out with a bunch of friends.

Why don’t you invite your male coworkers out for a drink after work? Instead of waiting for them to
invite you, invite them.

BFLR

BFLR,
Unfortunately the guys at my work are only 18. There have been several times where we all get off at 10 pm and go our separate ways. I don’t have a clue what guys can do together and I’m afraid I’ll look stupid if I try to put something together. Now that I look back at my life, I’ve been in this situation many times. I’ve had coworkers that were friends at work but we never saw each other out of work.

LOL KinXXXize,
You’ve been in a relationship for two and a half years and you feel like me?! Dude I’ve only had one girlfriend my whole life and that only lasted 2 weeks. Either way I can tell your confused but I’m not going to even try and give advice because I’m the last person on Earth who should.

Maxtro, check your pm

BFLR

I agree with rakishly that you need men in your life (although I definitely would not give the Freudian explanation :) ). As several of us have been saying, you need a social life before even thinking about getting close to one particular woman. I also agree with rakishly that you should quit all these dick supplements — and I would strongly, strongly suggest that you never even think of taking any “supplement” beyond nourishing food again — until, at least, you have the money to blow on this stuff.

I do not, agree, however — nor do medical studies — that SSRIs are “dangerous.” I’ve made enough long-winded arguments on this forum recently (cf. the anti-gay vote thread!), so please forgive me for using a pathetic argument from authority here: My career is in psychology research. I know the literature in and out. SSRIs and cognitive-behavioral therapy are safe, effective options for helping people to break out of depressive ruts and establish the successful life (including social life) necessary to maintain a sense of well-being.

Relax, do more kegels, concentrate (relax at the same time) on pc instead of bc muscle. Soon you’ll feel warm even hot energy rising… Human body has an amazing mechanism to adjust and adapt without resorting to artificial drugs. Works for both men and women, BTW.

I tend to remain a lurker on most boards, instead preferring to gather info for my personal consumption. But I feel compelled to throw my 2 cents in the mix here also:

The first thing I feel compelled to comment on is; Maxtro, you say that you are 23 years of age, work out several times a week, and in a “perfectly healthy” condition. Therefore may we assume you are a “normal” 23 year old male? Then I have to ask why are you putting that other crap into your body? And “crap” IS what I prefer to call it. If you’re 23. healthy, active, etc. Then my friend, you don’t need the crap.
You’re at an age where eating a healthy diet, regular exercise, and cultivating a positive attitude should be all that you need. I’ll be 40 years of age this year. I’m healthy, happy, active, fit and trim, and look like I’m half my age.At approx 5’6 I’m also of short stature. I’ve always looked very much younger than I actually am. It is a blessing in some respects, and a curse in other respects. ie; people thinking I’m not qualified, experienced enough in respect to employment, etc. This is easily enough resolved with my credentials. Where it becomes a major hindrance is with women of my own age. It’s not really a respect thing, but rather I get the impression that they think I’m a young stud with lofty ambitions - lol. My point is that I’m old enough to remember when the whole vitamin/supplement thing got started back in the mid 80’s. It really was the result of several enterprising young entrepreneurs looking to get rich. What better to sell than the promise of good health? They promised the world. But even your dogs vet will tell you the number one health issue with people’s pets are conditions cause by owners feeding them unnecessary supplements. You also have to remember that often times the intake of one vitamin / supplement causes the depletion of another corresponding element. Those popular zinc lozenges? They cause the depletion of a host of other essential minerals with in the body (I forget exactly which ones though). Although, I’ve taken these myself and they do seem to shorten the length of time I have a cold, flu, etc.
A better example is lysine and argonine. Amino acids essential for the proper growth of cell structure. However they work in conjunction with each other. L~lysine (the L~ in front denotes that it composed of natural ingredients as opposed to synthetic) is taken a lot by body builders to limit the length of time they ache from the fact that their muscle fiber is repairing itself. So it’s assumed that it speeds up the rebuilding process. There are also some post on this site in regards to lysine & PE. L~lysine is also taken by people with herpes as an alternative to valtrex. It reportedly is a very real alternative for people with herpes that indeeds works the same way valtrex does. Why? well I did some extensive research on this after I came down with a recurring case of shingles (on my left leg, yes very painful & stress related) and my a-hole doctor refused to give me a second dose of valtrex. It seems that herpes, shingles, and all the other “related” viruses, require the amino acid argonine in order to cell division and growth. The only way to stop it, is to temporarily limit your body’s production of argonine by taking lysine (cause and effect) thereby limiting and or stopping the length of time your afflicted. And as an added benefit of taking the lysine is that you get a nice complexion and a bigger load -lol. Since arogonine is also an “essential” amino acid, it is therefor not wise to continuously take lysine just for a “bigger load”. Healthy diet, good rest, limiting your smoking & your masturbation will also give you the same effect. You said that you don’t feel any different taking your supplements then there are 2 things I feel compelled to point out: first why would you continue to take it then? and the fact that your complaining about not sleeping good and your describing what seems to be to most of the people who responded as a mild case of depression.

I feel compelled to comment on the melatonin as well, since I’m very familiar with this stuff also. My oldest daughter suffers from mild ADD. The medication for this was causing her to have sleep issues also. Mainly it took her a long time to fall asleep. When the Doc suggested melatonin I was upset for the fact that he wanted me to give her meds in morning to wake her up and deal with the ADD and then give meds at night to put her to sleep. DUH? at 10 years of age ? what’s wrong with this picture? Well I researched this also. Melatonin is the naturally occurring brain chemical that is responsible for making you feel tired and going to sleep. The Melatonin they sell is all natural (hmm… where do they get it then?) it’s very fast acting, and wears off usually in less than an hours time. it’s mainly an aid to help you “fall” asleep by momentarily boosting your natural melatonin levels. And unlike any other “sleep aid” it causes no trouble with waking up the next morning or making you worry about sleeping through the fire alarm, since it’s out of your system in less than hour. I still don’t like having to use it with her and I don’t all the time, but the above facts did make me feel better about it (slightly) . O’ and it is very inexpensive.

From my own experience: One of the things that helps me to fall asleep is a relaxation technique I came across many many years ago in a book and still continue to use on an almost nightly basis. I’ve also seen variations of it on some of the self hypnosis / seduction sites.
Basically what you do is get in bed, ready to go to sleep, and close your eyes. Take a long deep breath while counting slowly to 4. Then exhale again slowly counting to 4, and continue to repeat this pattern. This will get you into the proper breathing rhythm for sleep. Now to clear your mind, visualize the number 5 in your mind and say it mentally on the exhale 4 times (this helps to keep the breathing rhythm going while clearing your mind). Now repeat this again with the numbers 4, 3, 2, & 1 at which time you should feel completely relaxed and soon drift off. In the beginning you may have to start with the number 10 or even pause, say between the numbers 3 & 2, and repeat the word “relax” to yourself 4 times instead and then continue with counting down. Like I said, I discovered this at about the age of 12 and I still use it 4 or 5 times a week. I actually prefer to use it because over the years I’ve also learned how to use it to “program” my mind (with things like positive affirmations and even things like “hey I’m growing / developing the penis of my dreams-lol). I get a much fuller, richer, deeper sleep & even better dreams. I also use it even if I just taking a short nap. I’ve done it for so long that it’s become second nature. Although this is the first time I’ve ever mentioned it to anyone.

Sorry if this was a little long winded, and Maxtro please don’t take it as a personal attack.
Take what applies and file rest for another day. Just wanted to share my experiences with you.

~Tork