Female Aphrodisiac

Dear All,

I’m now married with 3 children and on to my 40’s. How time goes by!
My wife and I had some ups and downs but are generally doing well. Of course our sex life is not the best. We’re working on it but we could use a bit of a kick. I’ve told her that I want to try putting some natural or chemical aphrodisiac in her water / coffee without her knowing to rule out the placebo effect and she agreed to try it. After all I’m her husband. She knows she can trust me.

Now, I’m looking for something that has proven effects. I would prefer something natural but chemical will also do. It must be something that I can put in her coffee, etc.

Please help a brother out!

PT141, if you’re going the chemical route.

But I’m sure others will have recommendations on herbs before you go sticking needles in your wife.

PT141 works well. But there’s no magic pill/lotion/injection that BY ITSELF will transform her libido.

The female libido is deeply reactive rather than proactive; and so you have to figure out the “keys” to getting her going, getting her to react: dirty talk, confidence, flirting, slapping her butt, etc.

One of the worst mistakes men make is thinking that women will “initiate” or that their sex drive is like theirs. It’s simply isn’t. So don’t.

I’m not a huge marijuana fan. That said my wife and I tried some and she had the most orgasms ever. Not sure what kind it was.

Viagra will make her clitoris erect the same way it makes guys erect when excited. Not sure the dose it would require. Best guess would be half or a quarter of what men take.

Our sex through the week is nice, our sex after we smoke on the weekends is even better.

I also begin flirting with her when she wakes up and throughout the day. Some random flowers too. Those types of things have delivered for me and continue to work.

These are things that you might want to try to give her to balance out her hormones.

Muira Puma
Avena Sativa
Catuaba
Suma Root
Damiana
Dong Quai
Vitex
Red Maca

If you can get it in a tincture form then that would be the best since you are trying to add it into her coffee/tea. Another thing is that a week prior and during her menstrual cycle she be the most optimal time to get her nice and rowdy since her hormones are going to be in your favour. Again, every women is different but pay attention to this. Another thing is that if she is under a lot of pressure/stress just in general, it will be hard for her to stay mentally motivated since her mind is distracted from the thing that is causing her to worry/stress, etc. Give this go, my girl responded well with the Red Maca but it only sticks around for her for about 2 - 3 days.

@ Paradigm: being in tune with her menstrual cycle is key. Good call.

Thank you all for your answers.

She’s actually in a after depression state so I’m trying to “boost” her libido. I know that the mind comes first and the body follows (for women).
I’ll try to be more romantic, caregiving, etc. But my “romantic energy” is almost depleted. Also watching the menstrual circle is a good advise but she always gets cramps, legs hurting etc. When it’s this time of the month..
I’ll try to find red Maca since it worked for you paradigm.
@Paradigm: Have you tried any combination of the things that you tested? How many drops of red maca did you use and with what intervals?

Anyone has any experience with Arginmax ?

It’s good to be caring and take care of her and be attentive and all of that. BUT, that’s not what’s really going to turn her on. And too much of it may have the opposite effect.

Agree with Platonist that soft and caregiving may only deflate her sex mood. All women are different, of course, but she might actually want a strong hand. With different women, this could mean different things. For some, it’s the full-on “tie her up and make her submit” routine. For others, simply taking her wrist firmly produces a jolt of sexual desire.

It’s one of those things that can be loosely classified as “red pill” that took me decades and one failed marriage to realize.

Thank you for your answers.

I always where a more heads on guy. Kinky AF sometimes. All my female companions where always more that satisfied, sometimes ecstatic. I liked to take their body in another dimension. With or without drugs.
The real problem is that my wife wants love before sex and I want sex before love. I can not “operate” in such environment. We were not so “compatible” since the beginning and this has grown to a big problem.
She always was the gorgeous, genius, party animal girl that everyone wanted. The thing is that she was a party animal, in bed also, with all the guys she has slept with because she was always (or most of the times) drinking OR she met guys that their were willing to offer the love first fuck later story.
When she’s sober she has a ton on inhibitions. When she’s a bit drunk and having fun she’s a real turn on. Now with 3 kids, and a 1-2 years of depression behind us she will NEVER start a thing OR even actively participate. She’s always very passive and just shits there and receives pleasure.. That’s NOT hot or a turn on..
I’m trying to find something that will help her (by being hornier maybe?) overcome her inhibitions and actively react to my “calling”.

Hello Brother,

At the moment, she uses Red Maca Powder (Not an extract version just Red Maca, brand we use is Ecoideas Red Maca Powder). She would take 1 Teapsoon per day. Everyone here is absolutely right on how to approach women. For my girl, to get her going, I would just send her raunchy text message of how nasty that I would get with her that night.

Another thing that I did with her is that I created a chain email listing all the turns ons, turn offs, type of dirty talk, fantasies, outfits, etc. I created this massive email to send to her and she didn’t realize all the things that were mentioned in there and BAM, on our next chance of sex, she incorporated some of the things that were mentioned. She also sent back a reply of the same list and it gave me a glimpse of the things that got her going and to be honest, when I incorporated some of the things she wanted me to express and say in bed, she would fairly quick prior to that email.

Here is another point and I want to be true and honest with you brother. I do not have kids or a family but would want to and I’m not your age yet. However, I truly believe that men want to fuck younger women and the same goes for women sleeping with younger men when left to their own thoughts. So I made it my mission to make sure that I stay fit all year round, I make sure that I smash those weights knowing that I’m getting some that night and when my girl sees me working out, especially my arms (she has a thing for biceps), it turns her on. So maybe for the both of you, you two should think about investing some time in making yourselves more visually appealing just to change up how you guys view each other in the light, you know what I mean? If you are not working out or resistance training, please my brother, for your confidence, go get a gym membership and be around other men in the gym. Enjoy being a man amongst other men and compete in that gym. That trait should be visible throughout your day and your wife will pick up on it. Like we are all on here because we know that women want men with big dicks, but for the most part, women do want the whole package.

Side note, my girl also tried the Dong Quai Tincture from St. Francis and she noticed a huge libido increase if you are still looking at supplements to help her. Good Luck

1. What does she or you mean by “love” in this context?

2. She may be - or surely is - either fooling herself or trying to fool you. “The real problem is that my wife THINKS she wants love before sex.”

3. Test it out by short circuiting that good girl posture

4. So, be flirty, smack her butt, have a few drinks with her, or few more - and dirty talk her into weak-kneed lust. She might see you as a bit of stranger - even a wee bit dangerous, whatever. Seriously, or whatever works.

The depression is difficult and that’s a bit complicated/complex.

Women are generally passive wrt libido; they are reactive to YOUR libidinous desires; they get turned on because you’re turned on by them - it’s a kind of virtuous emotional/erotic circuit, but the energy starts with YOU.

There are exceptions but the exceptions prove the rule. And don’t forget, many women were putting on a show when you were single: “look how hot, sexy and sexual I am. A great catch. Marry me. Etc.”

The only way you can help her be “hornier” imo is to be the man she wants you to be: super confident, aggressive, never asking but simply taking what you want, fucking her for all she’s worth.

I want to thank you for taking the time to answer.

The email idea is actually nice. She’s not into talking dirty or being very descriptive when it comes to communicating sexual desires, either verbally or in written. Nevertheless I will give it a try maybe.
Also you’re right about being fit. I need to shape up and so does she.

I ordered the red maca and premium maca extracts from The Maca Team. I plan on giving her the red one and I will try the premium one.
I also purchased Donq Quai from Nature’s Answer. Donq quai will arrive earlier so I’ll start with that one and then add the red maca when it arrives.
Any recommendation about dosage ?

1. By love I mean the soft tender lovemaking and not “fucking”.
2. So you believe that she’s fooling me or herself when she communicates the need of lovemaking and not fucking? She feels that we first need to connect to “another level” and fucking will come next. At least when she’s sober.
3. As for short-circuiting she always orgasms when I play with her. Either by hand, mouth or cock. She’s a big squirter something that I really like :) I have “short circuited” her body on some occasions leaving her lying down wondering what just happened.
4. Being flirty is something that I don’t do with her. Not even at the beginning. It’s her biggest problem. That I never flirted with her or make her feel wanted! I know that I’m wrong in this area but there has to be some sexuality in the air for me to flirt and there is NONE with her.

“The only way you can help her be “hornier” imo is to be the man she wants you to be: super confident, aggressive, never asking but simply taking what you want, fucking her for all she’s worth.”

Very powerful sentence. I used to be like that with women. That’s why I believe they where so in to me. I would allure their senses and body and just make them mine in every way. I have never done it with my wife and I really feel I’ve missed that train.

Honestly, you’re dealing with the most upsetting and dramatic—yet at the same time, most pedestrian and common—problem of long-time relationships: stagnation. No matter how hot or horny either party is, you’re still locked into long-term monogamy. There is no chase; the chase is done. Yet the chase is the thrill. That’s the paradox of monogamy. We’re expected to have sex with only one person—forever. At the same time, we’re expected to maintain a constant sexual charge, right? That’s what all the talk shows and articles tell us, anyway.

One thing that helps with me (or us) is introducing something utterly unexpected. If you’re older, if you’re married, if you’re settled, it doesn’t have to be much. Even little unexpected things take on great prominence.

Example: The last anniversary card I gave her had NONE of the usual love-dovey stuff. In it, I told her how I’d like to tie her up, spank her, and make her submit to my desires. Stuff that comes completely from left field can add a jolt to your relationship. But it has to be a bit wicked, as well.