HELP ED is ruining me

A potted history,

I ‘m mid 20’s and was single for a year after a 4 year relationship and in that time I’d a good few one night stands and no strings sex, some of which was good and some which I couldn’t get hard. I’m now 2 months in to a relationship with a girl I really like and we’ve only had se where I’ve finished 3 or 4 times, despite having sex a good 15-20 times.

Basically I can’t get hard, or I get hard and as soon as it comes to actual intercourse I lose my erection and I’m left with trying to make he most of a semi which makes me feel extremely inadequate.

I’ve talked about this with my new girlfriend and shes cool with it but its really frustrating me and no matter what she says I’m sure she would be rather having great sex.

Looking back over the years this issue has been a big part of my sex life I’ve just never really considered the severity of it.

I just want to have good sex!

I’ve read all sorts on the subject about not mind fucking with myself but its still an issue. I’m now considering viagra just to try and build my confidence up again? But I’m scared its not healthy at my age.

I’ve summarised below a few points which I think influence my situation:

- I constantly think I can’t pleasure a girl
- I think about how amazing it would be to have a pornstars dick
- I watch porn probably 2 or 3 times a week.
- when I’m masturbating I can get really hard
- I’ve had a verosil operation on my testicle to sort out the blood flow but I’m sure this isn’t realted to blood flow to the penis
- I’m not gay but I like t-girl porn now and again
- We use a little bullet vibrator when having sex 50% of the time.
- I suffer from anxiety disorder in general life. This started about 3 years ago, but I’d had issues with EQ prior to this
- I stay fit and healthy

Any help and advise is greatly appreciated.

Why can’t I think like a post I made in the past Size doesn’t matter - THIS DOES!

>> - I constantly think I can’t pleasure a girl
- I suffer from anxiety disorder in general life. This started about 3 years ago, but I’d had issues with EQ prior to this <<

I think those points are part of the problem. If you had EQ issues before the anxiety disorder, either there is another concurring cause or your anxiety was already there just you weren’t aware.

>>- I watch porn probably 2 or 3 times a week.
- when I’m masturbating I can get really hard <<

Try avoiding masturbating and watching porn for a while. Masturbartion and porn are not the cause of your problems IMHO, but coupled with your anxiety can make your problem worse. Basically when you have sex you compare reality with fantasy, a relation with another human being with a self-satistfying mode and at the first sign that the two ‘worlds’ (fantasy and reality) don’t match you are put down.

The other points are not related with your problem IMHO.

Beside that, the general advices: check your blood pressure, hormonal levels, glycemic index.

Hi 19052010,

I’ve been where you are at one point. It eventually led on voyage of self discovery, because I was prepared to look at anything to get my erections back. So I became interested in psychology and looking at events in my childhood. But along the way, I found a little trick than Marinera alludes to above: Stop all masturbation and porn for 2 or 3 weeks. If you must play with it, do not ejaculate! Ejaculation is the key. What will happen to a guy of your age is that abstaining from ejaculation will cause the hormones to build up until your body just won’t care about any little anxieties in your head. You will want to fuck with every fibre of your being. Solo ejaculation (in fact any sort of ejaculation), drains of male desire.

My advice to any guy in a relationship where plenty of sex is available is, don’t ever solo masturbate to ejaculation. Edging is fine, but if you have a willing partner, save your seed for her :)

Porn stars don’t have pornstar dicks. They cut together a lot footage to make it look like they pound and pound.

And newsflash, most females don’t want to be pounded and pounded. Most of the satisfaction comes from what you do with your hands and tongue.

I say never tolerate dry friction to your glans. You could rub yourself raw.

Sounds gay.

Nothing wrong with that. Like ?

Those keep an erection firm also.

Good. My adivce is give her ar least one orgasm before you attempt penetration. Don’t worry that you’re not imbued with a giant thick pornstar phallus. That’s silicone toys are for.

Don’t sit their flexing your kegels the whole time trying to look hard while you do. Then have her put the ring on you and tickle to erection and if you happen to be standing tall and she gets the urge to hop on,… see what happens.