QL’s No Porn/No Fap Challenge

14.5 weeks in right now, I feel fantastic! I am starting to “think” myself hard and can get hard with my wife from almost nothing, she can just stand there naked and I’m popping wood. Good energy, no feelings of guilt that I wasted time watching whatever porn-related, and the only outlet for anything sex-related is my wife.

But I have to confess, at times, maybe once a week, I check the r/bigclit sub Reddit. I marvel at how big clits can get and I’m fascinated by human genitalia. I don’t get hard or masturbate while looking, although it is arousing sometimes. Also, I think 6 weeks ago, I was deleting a lot of porn on the harddrives and I just popped wood from it suddenly since I hadn’t tried to stimulate myself with anything video or picture-related. I gave in and fucked my fleshlight for a minute or two and didn’t really pay attention to the screen, I turned away from it, and got off. But after that I realized how lame it was and it wasn’t even exciting or erotic or hot or anything and I haven’t done anything since. I haven’t even tried to delete more porn since then since I feel like I might want to see what I’m deleting. I have a LOT of porn on the computer! Its been over 3 months and I don’t miss watching it, I don’t even know what I have downloaded at this point, and I don’t plan to ever see it again. But its weird to think about and thinking about getting rid of it makes me think of porn and I just want to not be thinking about it at all. Tricky situation!

All in all though I’m off what I used to be on a lot all the time: chatroom sites and Pornhub-type sites. Completely off that stuff. Deleting my profiles on Chaturbate and MFC felt so fucking good, it was liberating.

Hey cheeba, more than a little late responding(!), but thanks for the last input you shared and amen to all of your comments & observations. Curious what your longest stretch has been since that post?

Previously it was a deal of wow, I shouldn’t be doing this and wallowing in the shame that giving into an addiction brings.

Like you mentioned, I found some Youtubes on the subject that were amazing in their claims but the more I read and corroborated what was being said, the more open I’ve become to trying to quit porn/fap for all the BENEFITS the stoppage eventually accrues!

Good to hear your experience bears this out too. I wish you the best in the effort because it can be very difficult. At the same time I’m looking for the mindset shift that reportedly occurs 90-180 days in where the numbness starts to lift as one’s brain’s nuerochemicals & processing systems begin to return to design specs.

QL

Hey pumpedmember! That’s crazy-awesome - where I want to be (14.5 weeks and eventually 14.5 years) having only my wife as my sole fascination & outlet sexually. Thanks for sharing all of it. Always good to know we’re not the only ones with “interesting” triggers. :)

Similar deal where I’ve so sexualized life that many, many things push me over the edge even like you said, the act of cleaning out porn (and bookmarks and notes to self and receipts, etc.). Glad you’re hanging tough and not that I want you to fail (and hope that I’m always 14 weeks behind you), but game on!

Best,

QL

Thanks QL!

Thanks QL. Sounds like this isn’t going to be easy but to not succeed would mean being dysfunctional for the rest of my life. When I started doing porn I didn’t know it could have these kinds of effects but, now that I know, there’s no way I’m going to let it ruin my life. Wishing you success QL!