PE and Mental health - Maybe you can relate

First, to the mods, if this is in the wrong place please move it. Thank you.

Maybe you feel like me. I’ll come right out and say it: PE is a double edged sword. It obviously works and Thunder’s is a great place to get information, but at the same time, I feel inadequate and that I won’t reach my goal of 8x6 fast enough (I’ll explain that in a second). The second thing I worry about is whether or not 8x6 will make me happy. What if I get to 8x6 and I still don’t fill my gf up? I don’t have ANY problems making her cum right now, so why do I feel this way? I remember about 2 years ago, her friend bought her a vibrator for laughs. It was 8x6. We played with it and she took both the length and the girth with no problems. That day totally wrecked my self-esteem. I can honestly tell you that I never had any ‘small dick’ problems before that. She stuck it ALL the way inside to the hilt. My penis is 7.25x5 basically. Only an inch away from my goal in both length and girth, yet I feel very inadequate. What throws me for a real loop is the fact that I’ve bottomed out on her a couple of times. And the first time I did she came so hard and so fast. BUT SHE WAS ABLE TO TAKE 8 INCHES THAT OTHER DAY!! WTF?? She says my thickness is not too big and definitely not small seeing as how I make her sore after about 20 minutes. BUT I SAW HER TAKE 6 INCHES OF GIRTH THAT DAY!! WTF??

I admit, I have a terrible problem with patience. I don’t have any; but I do understand that PE takes time. Just like weight lifting, you can’t get huge in 2 months or even 6 months unless you really dedicate yourself. So, in a way, it’s like a form of slow, reverse torture.

Like I said, Thunder’s is a good place for information, but at the same time, I get depressed/jealous/intimidated when I read about some of the stuff on here. Such as

People that already have huge dicks (I’m just jealous haha)

Guys that take more than a year to gain 1 inch of girth. (What if I take that long?)

Guys that get really big then find out that they still aren’t filling their wives up.

All of different theories (Quantity v quality, masturbation effecting gains, tunica v lig stretching, ect)

All of the different ADSs and other devices (which one is the best/most comfortable?! I don’t have money for them all!)

And most notably this video xhamster.com/movies/176070/big_dicks_amp_lusty_chicks_comp_vol_5.html (HUUUGE self-esteem killer)

I know I’m not the only one that feels like this. It’s really affecting my life. When I’m at school I’m thinking, “damn! I need to go home so I can PE”. When I’m at work I’m thinking, “damn! I need to go home so I can PE”. I’m always thinking about my dick. When I’m home on the weekends, I usually spend about 4 to 5 hours on yahoo searching things like “8 (9, 10,11) inch cock, biggest dick in the world, thick penis, does size matter” and other related topics. My dick and it’s lack of size is always on my mind. I am very aware that I technically have a larger than average dick, but one thing TOTALLY overshadows that: I SAW HER TAKE 8x6 WITH NO COMPLAINTS AND I KNOW MY 7.25x5 CAN’T POSSIBLY BE AS SATISFYING!! I mean straight up ramming that mother fucker inside her.

What’s funny is I remember my biology teacher telling us that he watched his wife give birth. He said he saw how big her vagina got and it messed him up in the head, forcing him to feel like he would never be able to satisfy her again. He had to go to counseling over it. They didn’t have sex for a year, he said. I feel like I have a mild version of that.

I don’t really know why I’m typing all of this. Maybe to just get if off my chest, but it’s really getting to me now. I wish I could have just been born with a big dick, but it wasn’t meant to be. I wish I could have enough self-confidence to not let my size bother me (like I said.I’m technically larger than average). I wish I wasn’t obsessed with my penis. I wish PE was just a matter of popping a couple of pills, but it’s not. I wish it didn’t take so long to get bigger. I wish I wasn’t around when she was playing with that toy that afternoon.

Thank you for your time. You don’t have to reply, if you don’t want to. I’m really just getting shit of my chest.

No direct links to porn, please.

So said, probably PE is not the ultimate answer for all your confidence issues; it’s not the cause of them either. It seems the cause of all your problems is that damn vibrator.

Synopsis: He is impatient and the pain of waiting for an 8x6 is almost too much to bare.

I feel your pain man.

But on the bright side, PE is a long process, and with age comes wisdom, so I think you will be OK.

Sorry about the link. I think you are both right. Damn that vibrator!! But what can I do about it? The image is burned into my head!! Damn my impatience!! It’s the McDonaldization of out culture!! We’re too used to getting everything fast!! Fuck my life!!

However, when I DO get 8x6, it’s gonna be the best performing 8x6 in the world!! I’m gonna do it!! I HAVE to do it!! For myself! For my gf! For the universe!! For FREEDOM!! Everyone put your dicks in the middle! Dick Team on 3! 1, 2, 3! DICK TEAM!

First of all, LOL.

Secondly, if your girlfriend took an 8 x 6 dildo(I am assuming you measured it yourself) with ease, then she needs to start kegeling. It will help things a lot.

You’re laughing WITH me, right? I hope not at me.

And no I didn’t measure. The box did that for me. It actually had the girth in circumference instead of width, which I found interesting. I clearly remember 8x6. I put on my crotch area to see what it would look like to have one that big and it was fuckin HUGE looking.

She’s not interested in kegeling. I’m not worried about that though. What if things don’t work out with her? I’d better be able to fill up that pussy by own means!

Hey Beaver, damn good post. You said it all quite well. I know exactly what you’re talking about and I’m sure I’m not the only one who can absolutely relate.

Not sure what to tell you but it sounds like you’re in school so you’ve got to be pretty young, which means you’ve got a lot of years in front of you to fuel this obsession of yours.

I’ve been there. Kind of still am from time to time. Its not a fun place to be. In fact it may as well be hell.

Google BDD. Its for real.

I PE for health now. I do not believe 8x6 can be achieved by everyone. I don’t know why but I’m pretty sure its not about time or effort. At least not for 99.9% of every averge sized man on the planet. I do believe; however, that .1% of average sized PEers will get there and maybe you’re part of that segment.

Add another 1/4” to your girth and you should be living large. Should be doable. When I went from 5” to 5.25” you would have thought I was an entirely new man. Almost every woman I slept with said I had a big cock. Before then that never happened.

Lastly, try and let the dildo thing go or mark my words in less than a year from now you will have driven that girl of yours away.

I’ve been around for many years. I know this world and am just passing along some wisdom I’ve gained along the way.

Again, great post.

I think we all feel (or felt) the same way. As men it’s in our nature to strive to be the biggest, thickest, longest, and baddest dude. We want to be able to fill up every beautiful woman on the world if we wanted to. As an Asian man I have the extra mental burden of trying to show the world that Asian guys can have gigantic penises, too. But face it, there will always be some guy bigger than us, and some girl who can take more meat than you can dish out. Do it for yourself and just be the best man you can be!

I could get to 8 x 6 if I wanted to, most definitely. Do I want to? No. It’s too big in my mind.

Good post. I can relate, man.

Obsessive behavior. I get it too. Can’t stop thinking about something and it blocks everything else out.

I think you’re setting yourself up for failure though. Both on obtaining your goal and possibly an injury that puts you out of the game for a few months. Now that would torture you to wait for it to heal!

When I get this obsessive behavior going myself, I try to replace it. Figure out something else to focus on that might drive you to the point of distraction. Maybe not possible, but worth a try.

BP-

This too shall pass. I was there.

If you want to fix your head then stop watching big-dick porn— there be dragons.

Many moons ago I wigged out while having one of the few successful copulations with the WWWV when I found most of my XXL glove wearing hand inside her and her loving it— it too fucked with my head long and hard, taking what was an already tenuous sex life and, shall we say, not improving it.

Now, more than a decade on and having semi-retired from PE the day that I tagged 8*6 [just that day, BPEL, post PE/ pump— but I DID IT] and having gone down a fisting road for a while as well as having non-pro sexual relationships with adult industry women, I’ve learned that while size “does matter”, it doesn’t matter in the way that we think it does, and that you can make a woman your sex slave without even unzipping your fly if you come to her correct.

Now I can dig extreme penetration porn with only enjoyment and no negative reactions, having gone extreme myself at times [“clap” “can’t” “tight, huh”] and am here to tell you that once you come out the other side you’ll only shrug and smile knowingly when “size” come up.

Wow. Thanks for the input, I thought this was gonna be one of those “shut the fuck up and get over it” type of deals, but it’s good to know I’m not the only one, and that others have gotten over it.

Baywatch - I looked up BDD, and I think you’re TOO right. I probably do suffer from that. I think the only cure is getting a bigger dick, though. Maybe I won’t get 6 in girth, but I want at the very least 5.5, I think that’s doable. I know I can get an inch in length, that seems to be the easy part.

GFang - I know you feel what I’m saying, maybe even worse. You have the Asian stereotype to fight. Honestly though, that kind of makes it easier, because if you whip out a smaller sized penis, the girl is just gonna think, ‘oh well, that’s what I expected”. However, I know you want to change their minds, so good luck!! Don’t go crazy like me though!!

Man-of-10 you’re a lucky boy!! Though, the idea that 8x6 is too big for most does kind of make things easier. Maybe I should shoot for 5.5. That eases the stress on my mind a little.

Esc & onenekkidguy - Dicks in the middle! Dick team on 3! 1, 2, 3 DICK TEAM!! Let’s get to our goals and not go crazy doing it!! I have way too much stuff to worried about for my dick to get in the way. I’m a musician, and I don’t practice that much anymore because my fuckin dick is always getting in the way (not literally, of course. If it did I wouldn’t have this problem!)

Andro - Wow. That’s all I can say. You’re a very confident man. If my fist were to fit inside my gf, I think I would go off the deep end. She’s not into that though, so I guess I’m lucky. I think I need to avoid porn, period. Lately I’ve been PEing to erotic stories (which might be worse than big dick porn. Every guy in those stories is ‘long and thick, allowing her to feel every vein of his huge throbbing cock’). My goal is to not watch porn, masturbate or really do anything to my dick until it’s time to PE. I’m gonna try this for 2 weeks and see what it does.

Thanks for your help guys!! I do feel better! I can’t really talk to the gf more than I already have about this. Her lack of a penis tends to make her not understand how I could feel how I do.

To sum it up -
PE not for her, but for myself.
Don’t be concerned with how big I want to be, just do the shit and get bigger. Period.
Don’t watch porn that makes me feel inadequate, especially since those guys are seeked for having huge schlongs. “There be dragons” afoot.
Get over the vibrator issue (I think I am mostly, it happened a while ago. I just think about it every now and then and it still kind of gets me)
Most importantly, the gf loves me and already finds pleasure she can’t get from any massive toy through my penis.

However, in all honesty, I know I’m not going to feel better until I get a massive dick. I’m gonna go for it and just not let it make me crazy. It may take years, but this is a good teacher for patience and discipline. Maybe this actually for the best?

Great honest post. A few pieces of advice, some of which you touched on..

1) Don’t put anything larger than your dick into your girlfriend unless you are 100% confident about your dick size. Do you think your girlfriend would fuck you while she wears an Angelina Jolie mask? No, because no matter how hot you think your girl is, she knows she’s not as hot as angelina, and she’ll be the one to get a complex that you seemed more excited ‘having sex with Angelina’.

2) In bed, you are more than a pussy-filling device. You can do many things to her that the vibrator can never do, and in fact, the vibrator is one of the tools in your arsenal. You’re the one who brought it into the bedroom, something that many men don’t even bother doing. She probably considers it an extension of your sexual relationship

3) You’re pretty big already.

4) Don’t worry or overthink, just PE and you’ll get huge eventually.

5) After you watch big dick porn, switch it up occasionally and watch japanese porn. Those little guys do more with 4 inches than I can do with almost 8. Even when you see japanese girls with monster cocked black/white guys, they don’t make the girls cum and squirt like the japanese guys do generally. In fact, much of big cock porn has no female orgasms. Ever notice that?

6) Remember, SIZE MATTERS but it’s just ONE of MANY components that blow a chick’s mind in bed. Get her to squirt a couple of times with your fingers and she’ll forget all about that vibrator :)

Thanks, bro. You’re 7.85 BPEL?? I don’t have a fat pad, so all of my measurements are NBPEL. Our dicks are the same in length and you are not that much bigger than I am in girth. A reachable 6 month goal. You sir, are my new inspiration. I recall reading a post by you explaining how most of the women you’ve fucked are more than satisfied with your size. I’m glad I posted my thoughts. It is a fine day.

1. LMFAO. You must know my gf or something!! Personally Angelina isn’t THAT sexy to me. Now, put a Christina Milian or Meagan Fox mask on and she might have a problem.
2. Her friend gave it to her. She actually ended up throwing it away. Since then I”ve bought her a g-spot vibrator. She kinda likes it, but she’s really more into those finger vibrators.
3. Technically
4. Good point.
5. Damn the Japanese!! They always use our stuff better than we can!! That’s a good suggestion though. I need to learn to wield my long-sword the way the Samurai wield their Katanas. (That was such a nerdy pun, but it’s actually applicable) Great suggestion!! Mwahahahaaaa!! Honestly though, I wanna get thicker so I can fill her up. I don’t want it to be like insanely massive or anything. She gets sore fast already, so I don’t think she can really do that much more. Plus that night with vibrator we had literally been fucking like all afternoon so she was very relaxed already. I do want 8x6, though. Gonna shoot for 8x5.5 first. But I must also learn new tricks, so that I can drive her wilder than I already do, and by the time 8x6 gets here; let’s just say she should go ahead and throw all of her panties away.
6. I’ve gotten her to squirt before plenty of times. What’s SUPER crazy is that the first time I made her do it, I was fucking her on like 30% erection after we had fucked for like an hour. I felt something wet on my balls and thought I was sweating. I looked down and noticed the whole side of the car and the ground was wet. I guess the softness of my dick kept repeatedly rubbing her g-spot perfectly and it made her squirt. Sex is weird at times.

Great reply, brother!