Told friend about PE, girl says size does matter...

You shitting? Now that I got caught “cheating”! Now I know why I don’t feel guilty. Sorry I hurt her but not guilty! I did apologize to her for the hurt and lies. We are reading a book called “After the Affair”! basically a slow read and we discuss everything together and share our feelings and thoughts. It is helping a lot. We fuck like mink! She confessed to being abused as a child and made to suck her brother’s cock! Now she gives me head whenever I ask and even when I don’t. She’s the girl I married again and more! I do all those things for her so should I not so she doesn’t fail again!?!?

I hope that you and your wife have a Happy life together.

It is not easy dealing with issues of abuse and affairs, but with strength and communication you can both see this through.

It is rare to read of such a good conclusion to such a series of challenges.

Not to turn this into a couch session but do you think her response to you now is simply reactionary or a coping mevhanism?

It’s an opportunity to learn to be together in a way that both people can be comfortable with.

She is both reacting and coping, but arent we all?

Most of all of our actions are a re-action to some prior stimulus.

Now its a couch session!

Eh … true. But from 0 to 60 like that …. whatever works, I guess.

0 to 60?

This may not have been so sudden.

People can process things for years before they make a decision.

You are correct. Things can certainly progress over time.
But to go from something like ‘no oral’ to ‘unsolicited oral’, that’s a pretty big jump, I’d say.

Yes. Nice change for our colleague, given his history.

The catholics say that an affair can save a marriage, and while I disagree personally, I have seen it work.

And Memento, sorry to discuss you in the third person, my apologies.

I am a confirmed Catholic! So is my wife. I think her confession to me about her being raped and abused in her childhood got rid of whatever told her NOT to suck my cock! I’ve told her for years that it was all I wanted for Christmas. Halleluia!

I thought at first it was reactionary as she was trying to keep me! We’ve discussed that in therapy and I expressed my fear of the honeymoon ending. We may have slowed down a wee bit as I needed some sleep but she is raring to go. She has even begun sending me work emails from her job during the morning. She is the general manager so she can finally do what she sees fit. She certainly WANTS to spend time with me now. Our therapist asked me how much time I need her to spend with me. I said 100% but I know that is unrealistic so I’ll settle for the most I can get.

She rode me for an hour this morning and then realized she had to get to work. I suggested she shower alone to speed it up and she said “no way! You’re showering with me!” That’s something new we’ve started doing since the affair ended. Looking out for each others needs 100%. We are sooo lucky. We both feel like we have won something in all of this! :)

Wow. That’s really cool. At least you never got to the point to where you just wanted to have nothing to do with her and the attraction was gone. It’s obvious you two still loved each other throught the affair, and you came out the other side better for it. Nice.

No, women are just better liars. They can lie without compunction or guilt and keep that lie on lock down better than most of us guys. Guys get guilt ridden easily and get sloppy and found out more often than females. Then those females know how to reveal & exploit our guilt while keeping us in the dark about them. Love ‘em but I’d NEVER fully trust ‘em, ever.

I’m not sure whether gay men or hetero women are better liars, but I know women lie for profit and for effect, while men seem to lie when cornered and run wounded as a result.

(Not a scientific study, some restrictions may apply. Not available in all states.)

The worst females are the ones who accuse you of all the shit tricks they are using, and petition friends and family and your own kids to take her side while her lawyers steal your money.

I shake my head.

So if you meet a pretty little thing and she has a big house and new car and she only works part-time and her kids are always somewhere else, you can guarantee some other dick is footing the bill.

I dated several of those, and they got defensive quickly when I asked questions.

They’ll still fuck if they think you have some cash somewhere that your ex didn’t get at,. So dinner isn’t ruined with a few pointed inquiries.

But you have to know who you are dealing with.

Quotable material there. Depressingly true for both sexes.

I have lied by omission for three years about my membership and activities here.

I long to be able to tell my wife what I’ve learned and attained, but she saw the thunders page open on the desktop some years ago and dissed the entire thing.

Not the way to encourage open discussion about anything.

Excellent advice!