I thought I broke it

Just a moment ago I disided to do my last pe routine for this week and get it over with. I warmed up and applied vegetable glycerin all over for a good seal after stimulating my self to 100% I put the cylinder on and started to pump. Pssst psst psst I looked down and the needle had not moved so I tried to pump faster thinking maybe I had a slow leak. I could see my erection deflating like a wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube man and was like WTF?! You see a few days ago I tried wet pumping again and got water in my mityvac piece of sh*t pump so I turned it over and bailed as much as i could out. I tried several methods to check the seal including pumping on my leg to see if maybe it was pubes were in the way and pumping the air out of my mouth with just the hose, everything checked out fine. I even went over the problem area on my body with an electric razor.

As a last resort I decided to unscrew the the female connector and lube around the O ring. Once all assembled and back on my lubed member it kept pressure after a few pumps again. Thank god I thought I was going to have to disassemble the pump and attempt to fix a cracked seal or worse yet, pump by mouth pressure.

Thank you for your post, it will be helpful to some people I am sure.

I had to laugh when you made the “wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube man” reference. Not laughing at you, but rather the image you put in my head. Haven’t seen one of those things for a couple of years, I wonder if there are many still around?

Best wishes, stay safe!

The weird thing is that my pump actually works better now. Without taking it apart it’s almost like the tuner seal was sticking before where now it glides smoothly. I’m thinking about living it with petroleum jelly or axel grease, whichever is safest to use with rubber.

The wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube man joke was in reference to to Family Guy. I havnt seen too many of those in recent years either. I have seen a lot of crudely drawn,not so funny, plywood, folk art. Just look for the sort of ben & Jerry’s looking cow in Weekapaug.

Hi “TheGreatDivider”, that’s not so weird at all! Many products are now made in places that just don’t care like China, Philippines, Taiwan, etc., but most often they are just made in a hurry! Most times manufacturers in these places do not go the extra mile, and so the item needs a little extra attention from the end user… just as you have found. A good example is the harbour freight vacuum pump which is a quite cheap pump yet not too bad. A lot of people who get that pump often find it not quite “finished”, sometimes with burrs, or metal filings in the chamber, etc. Just a little work brings it up to spec comparable with much more expensive pumps. You yourself have put in just a little effort and reaped much greater performance!

You might need to be careful about using petroleum jelly or axle grease with some types rubber. These could make some rubbers deteriorate fast. I think you might be better off to use a silicon grease instead. Do read any instructions first before using anything, just to be safe!

Thanks for that! I’m not a “Family Guy” sort of guy, so maybe did not get the reference as you intended.

“You might need to be careful about using petroleum jelly or axle grease with some types rubber. These could make some rubbers deteriorate fast. I think you might be better off to use a silicon grease instead. Do read any instructions first before using anything, just to be safe!”-mch

I came to my senses and went with a thick glycerine based lube to grease the piston. For a while it made a queefing sound but now even that’s lightened up a bit. Like I said my hand pump is a junker only held together with a few nuts and bolts and a lot of hope, I even took the spring out so the handle wouldn’t snap again.

For my next big project I’m thinking about building a smart pump out of a few spare parts and equipment I can find at hardware stores,aquarium stores, and online for less than $200-$300 when complete.

Your post was a little hard to read, but was this a picture bright cylinder? I have 2 and they are junk both leak at the end of the tube near fitting because it is not one whole piece. My tubes both leak at the joint where they matted the flat disc part to the tube itself. Its glued only like half way I tried to fix it but keeps leaking eventually. They refused exchange because they were used and no longer had original package. Picture bright can kiss my ass sorry for thread high jack. I just threw them both out a few days ago because they really would not stop leaking going to buy a new better quality cylinder and new pump start over buying cheap you pay for it in the end.

No I never heard of picture bright. I bought my cylinder on sale from a gay sex leather store when they were having a going out if business sale. It’s an LA cylinder with a large flange at the end, and everything is melted on. Not a bad cylinder but can get a little incomfortable at the pubic bone so I need to find something to cushion it that will allow for the wide 90deg angle flange.

If you are looking for a good replacement cylinder try either lapdist.com, or vacu-tech. I’ve seen pump toys does have a nice line but rather pricy. If you need to replace any on the quick disconnect parts cpc plastics company has everything you will need in regular, medical, lab grade, and food grade parts.

On the other hand if you wan to go the cheap bastard route you can just get a 2” aquarium gravel vacuum sump for about $15 (>$10 at wal-mart) and tape the end to cushion your self from cuts. Attach a $5-6 air check valve for a 1/4” tubing from CPC to the end with the bulb and you have a complete system (minus pressure guage) for under $30. I don’t reccomend it though.