For young guys with erection problems - Scienceguy's method

LMAO, though I understand it completely. I mean, it seems that the different genre or even styles of porn have distinct energies that….correlate to distinct areas or levels of our brain.

Like say, for instance, you are watching Lisa Ann getting DP’ed - maybe this triggers pleasure in correlating sex to DOMINANCE (or “Violence”, you tell me?). In juxtaposition, I guess we have a scene where three HOT librarian lesbians in an ass-eating train - perhaps this stimulates a SENSUALITY area in our brain. I actually give these examples because they’re scenes I’ve viewed, nothing particular about them, simply that in my perception, they elicited different energies as I watched them.

I feel more guilt by watching DP’s, than I do by watching hot lesbians, after I bust. Can I get an amen!!? I’m not quite sure how to elaborate much further on the idea..I shouldn’t have smoked that bowl. Anyway, maybe this is tangential, but I was saying it because ScienceGuy said he DID consider what Tossed Salad said, and I just figured it was because of his overviewing of porn, and let’s just face it, the higher dick to pussy ratio, the “gayer” (sorry to offend anyone with that word, not sure what else to use :( .).

Wanted to say, Scienceguy, your Friday night with this girl sounds similar to one I had a few months back. I knew I was out to “pull some hoes” that weekend, so I got my PE on M-W and kegeled throughout the days leading up to that night. I met this girl at the bar, we talked a lot (she was more tipsy than I, but not terribly so) and there was attraction (as well as an irritating, shot out jealous buddy). I went back to her friends place and we watched Big Lebowski and talked about movies, music, lightly on politics, and our jobs. We began to watch Full Metal Jacket (I know, great choice right? Weird bitch.) and we had a slow makeout session which ultimately led to manual stimulations: Neither of us came, though. And then we fell asleep for a few hours, on her friends (actually, her married lesbian friends) couch, her head on my chest and my leg twixt hers…and THIS is where our stories Fork….

She got up to use the bathroom and right before she entered she let out a HUGE rattling fart! Then she shut the door. I Fuckin’ put my stuff on and left. Never got her number either.

By the Way, ScienceGuy, how is it going with this new gal? You said you think you’d “be in good shape with her.” Good Luck!

Amen! (sorry, couldn’t resist. Oh internet)

Sounds like you’re living a wild life man. Would you have had sex othewise? You think the old boner would’ve worked?

We’re going steady now. The irony of working out my issues with first-time sex ED. But she’s a keeper, and I’m at that point in my life where when I come across a keeper, I actually try to keep her.

It wasn’t too wild. She was a Kindergarten teacher and she didn’t behave or hold herself like a “Skeezy.” She gave a good handy, and got me hard. But anyway, I had unconsciously “employed” albeit half-assedly, your ‘method’ the week following up to that evening. Sigh, if she had used some discretion, she might’ve been MY keeper.

I’m sure the old boner would’ve come through for me. If not, I would’ve choked the sh*t out of him and beat him up later.

Considering your username, I expected more science…

Nah, not this time. Just saying what worked for me, as is generally the case around here. There is surprisingly little good science on curing psychological ED - probably because a doctor would rather prescribe a pill than hear about all your insecurities and addiction to porn. And it’s not like a guy is gonna admit those things in person anyway.

I’m really glad I stumbled on this thread inadvertently.

This sounds like the story of my life, and in the very same way it was always comforting to have another classmate be late for class rather than knocking on the door on your own, I felt a good amount of relief reading this!
I’ve always had trouble getting a good erection the first times, and it has always gone away after a while, but sometimes quite a long while!

My really first “love” story happened when I was 14, and actually I’d been in the same class as the girl for 3 years. We’d been flirting and fighting like cat and dog but were too shy to admit we felt something for eachother. When we finally did, her lack of confidence added to mine made so that we didn’t dare a “french kiss”, which was the furthest we could have gone at this point in our lives. She dumped me couple weeks after and I felt crushed, self confidence took a dive of abyssal proportions… I never felt confident around girls and wrapped myself up in some kind of uninterested or “too good for you” attitude as a cover up, which didn’t help with girls as one can imagine.

I met my first real girlfriend when I was 19. Yeah I know, that’s a bit on the pathetic side but I can’t do anything about it now. She was a virgin as well, and after a couple of weeks of making out, one night she finally asked me what I’d come to fear “let’s make it!”. Well, believe it or not, it took me 8 months, 8 full months to finally overcome my fear! Well to be frank we didn’t have that many opportunities to sleep together with us still living at our parents’, but there you go, I would find an excuse whenever it was possible not to face the situation. We broke off -well she dumped me once again!- 4 years later, and I went on to meet my future wife and mother of my two childs. I don’t recall having much trouble with her, because I knew I could do it. I was still a bit scared, but I became comfortable with her quite fast. 10 years on and she dumps me for another guy, admits to me I never made her come… ouch! I was hurt in my pride but most of all, I feared I wouldn’t be able to seduce someone else, my self confidence was quite low… and I knew the old “fear of the first time” would rear it’s ugly head with any new girl i’d lure into my bed.

The next one I met on the web, and as usual I couldn’t get a hard one the first time… well, not before a couple of hours, I still made her come half a dozen times eating her out, and when I finally managed to stay hard long enough to penetrate her I got a cramp on my calf. I had tensed my muscles all night trying to get an erection! We ended up having great sex for three years, friends with beneftits and all that but in the end she wanted more so we had to move on.

During this time I spent a couple of weeks with a very small blonde girl, and after that had an 8 months relationship with a gorgeous brunette, 85D breasts. Both girls I had troubles the first times. Actually, with the blonde girl I only managed to come twice. All the other times I would lose erection before, she had a cute face but was built like a child, that was a turn-off. But it destroyed my confidence because with these two girls I used condoms, which I weren’t used to, and that was putting another erection killer on top of my performance anxiety. With the brunette girl, though she had everything to turn me on (I love tits) it took me one month and a half to fully make love to her.

Next one was a former high school mate of mine, a girl with a really awesome body, 90D tits with great shape, nice butt, she had it all. But I was scared, because I knew she was way more experienced than me, at a rough guess she’s likely had 30 men in her life before me. So the first time I ate her out nicely, but couldn’t get past my stress. The second time I could, because she handled it (pun intended) like a champ, blew me, nice hand job, sat on me and rode me without fail. Once I was in with her awesome breast rubbing my chest there was no turning back! One year later we broke off, that was my call this time.

Next one I still had the first time stress and I once more couldn’t penetrate her on our initial date. My timely excuse was being drunk, but the truth is that once more I couldn’t handle the condom, and actually the next time we had sex without. Not very clever, but that was easier for me not to add another difficulty. After that time I was able to have sex with her with condoms, which we did a couple of times and then she moved on because she was looking for a serious relationship and I wasn’t.

The last and current one is the very first one. Yes, my first love, the girl who broke my hart when we were 14. We had found each other back in 2002 through the internet, and she was in the same situation as I’d just been : unhappily married, plenty of questioning. We’ve came really close in the last couple of years, comparing our life issues and so on. So when she finally divorced we knew we’d try to have sex, and we did. As ususal it was really difficult for me to get a good hard on AND a condom, I still managed to enter her but I could feel I was only like 75% erect and I finally had to give up, much to her distress. As she is someone I can confide to, I’d already told her about my “condition” so it helped her not feel to bad about it, she knew it wasn’t about her. Because let’s face it, girls are as insecure as we are, if not more. The next time I managed to keep my hard on with the condom, and I haven’t had the problem since.

So what to make of all this? This trouble is due to lack of self confidence, fear of not meeting the expectations. I’m on this site because I hope that a bigger tool may help me feel more confident when I’m in a situation where I have to drop my trousers, but it may not be enough. The problem is in my head, not in my underwear.
I certainly have missed plenty of opportunities because of this. This may sound like I’m bragging (but after I’ve bared my sould in front of you guys you will know I don’t bragg) but I think I’m rather on the good looking side, 6’ tall, reasonably built, not dumb, cute face. I’ve had girls hit on me and didn’t seize the opportunities by fear of not being able to live up to their expectations. I have never tried to play the womanizer either, because of this fear. Yet, when I’ve really wanted a girl and tried to have her, I’ve had her.
So here I am standing at crossroads. I’m 37 in a couple days, there’s plenty of nice years to be lived. I haven’t enjoyed life and girls as much as I should have, and I know that’s entirely my fault, no one to blame but me. What I’ll do with the next 10 years is also down to me, I hope writing this black on white will help me get rid of this stupid fear. Almost all the girls I slept with since my ex-wife have had orgasm with me, the last two have made me the “perfect cock” comment when I didn’t ask for it so I guess this PE thing is working a bit. A bigger dick is not going to solve my lack of confidence by itself, but it’s a step in the right direction.

Thanks for reading, hope it helps someone as much as the OP helped me.