Wives over 50

I appreciate you bringing this up Steelbender as this is an issue that affects a lot of us…and I especially appreciate your perspective Sunshine….

How are things working out? Any progress?

My wife never went through menopause. She had a problem with her period when she was young and went on birth control pills for that but it never solved the problem permanently. Then she became a vegetarian and her problems went away. The doctor says she avoided menopause when she became a vegetarian because she substituted soy products for meat. It seems she solved her menstrual cycle problem as well.

Never experienced much of a problem. My wife is 67 and we still enjoy sex 3 or 4 times a week. This morning, she enjoyed three or four orgasms in a row.

Maybe try to have a passionate kiss every day. One that won’t lead to sex. That should hopefully take the pressure out and can rekindle interest.

Drugs? Hormones? Peing to fix your problems?

Dude, go read a good book on marriage counseling. Any book written by a woman like “Divorce Remedy” by Michelle Weiner Davis. You’ll find that this problem is something you need to be supportive with her about and how you must show her you still love her just as she is like Sunshinekid said. Putting your need to have sex before her need to feel comforted and loved is just asking for trouble. It is hormonal having to deal with a drop in estrogen as her reproductive cycle ends for good, probably after a few years of a high testosterone high sex drive - which is confusing for how asexual she is now. HRT or not, you need to be prepared to for less sex in your marriage as you both age. It’s going to happen! But that doesn’t mean your marriage will be anyless enjoyable and the sex won’t be fantastic.

I ended up marrying my fuck buddy after she railroaded me. I felt obligated to take care of my family, but I should have listened to my best friend who told me she was evil and just paid child support.

We had great sex while I was going to school in Minneapolis, but I never considered anything more. I moved back home and got a call a month later.. “Meet me at a this NOMAL party in Wisconsin”. I was horny as hell, so I did, and later found out she “forgot” to take her birth control AFTER a entire weekend of non stop fucking… liar, and my bad for believing her.

So fast forward 22 years, two kids , one house , mini van , $200k and toxic empty nest later.. We are both depressed and want a divorce after all these years of regrets.

I’m not concerned with her, except for the fact she just started working (after 20 some years) and will probably suck me dry for even more money in the future.. Its me who need attention. I’m a mess.

Wrap it guys! And hope the women you fall in love with, or the women who targets you, doesn’t turn into a ice cold vampire witch

Wow! GiantScale, sorry about that. Sounds like you both let your marriage become quite toxic.

Shit happens. But I never lied about my true intentions..

What sucks the most is I’m still living with her because I haven’t found another, second house to buy.. Talk about miserable.

Some women don’t loose sex drive as they grow older. I wonder if its more hereditary, or if they take care of themselves..

No, sounds like she’s out for money. Another man for the grinder, sadly.

How old is she? Could it be that she is going through menopause? My wife was pre-menopausal for years and those were the most
difficult years of our marriage. Since her hysterectomy she has become her old sweet self. Those were hard times. There was many
nights that I sat in my garage with a cold beer in my hand wondering if I should just give up and quit and get out of the marriage. I just
find myself doing it because I truly do and did love her. We have been best friends for such a long time.

We as males have to realize that when our wives go through menopause, we as spouses have to go through it with them. If you say
“I do”, you have to mean it. I also believe that men have to understand menopause and what it does to a female.

What I don’t understand is when you approach your wife and she turns you down or ignores you it doesn’t make any sense to me. What does she have against an orgasm? Seems like she would stop initiating but to turn down an offer of physical pleasure doesn’t make sense to me. What am I missing?

She’s 47.. And I think the part your missing, is instead of the waves of pleasure during youth.. Its actually uncomfortable, or simply hurts, to have sex during or after menopause.. According to my wife.

Its hard to comprehend how the vibrant young attractive frisky women I fell in love with who just generally wanted to make me happy and did.. Who would wake me up with a BJ, want to swing with couples and females, ask me to nail her in a porta potty etc etc etc .. . didn’t happen yuck
How she could turn into a … ice cold vampire witch who’s only interest are to serve our adult age children she just moved back into the house. Im chopped liver.. My old friends, even her Mom, say something happened to me. Hmmm? wonder what happened? lol

The last five years feels like Im living with a male room mate instead of my wife.

If I understand you correctly, your saying that because she feels uncomfortable and or it hurts that she no longer wants to have an orgasm. Can anyone shed perspective on whether or not female menopausal women masturbate?

Talking about uncomfortable or hurting, what about vaginal lubes? There some out on the market that last for days. Between that and hormonal supplements it seems that we should demand that they do as much as they can to find what works if for no other reason but to maintain congeniality in the relationship.

Is it any wonder that guys will divorce their menopausal women for younger stuff? Sticking it out with someone who is neglectful of our needs to feel close and have a physical relationship seems extremely selfish, self centered and overall abusive. That kind of shift in personality is deviating from the woman we married originally. For Better or Worse is one thing but to live in abject misery doesn’t seem practical. Life is too short.

Mine turned fifty in May and the month before all hell broke loose, and she asked for a separation and camped out in the guest bedroom.

That lasted about a week and then she said she couldn’t do without me.

I’ve been gunshy since even though we seem to be past the worst of her insecurity.

She was on an I.u.d., which regulated her cycles and controlled fertilisation and after her birthday she removed it, bringing on a nightmarish bleeding that she said was the way things were before the device was in inserted.

I asked her to have another one put in, but she doesn’t want to.

What do you do?