I want to start to kegel. Give me your best advices and tell me about your results!

I believe that by strengthening the BC muscle, length gains become harder to achieve. This is why many try to reverse kegel while stretching, to negate the effect of this muscle. I figure the weaker it is, the less interference it will have on length exercises.

Firefox has a great built in spell checker now. You can add words immediately too, which is cool.

More back to the topic,

I have tried stopping my orgasm through kegeling. I must not have the !@#$%^&*() to do it. I will say that when I try (to a point where my ears almost get sucked inside out) my wife loves the increase in girth (i think) so much so that she usually cums which then makes it even tougher to stay focused and then whammo, it’s all over. I guess that is a good thing but I would sure love to learn how to control that. I have read most threads on the topic but still no help so if anyone here has the magic thought process to help me out that would be great.

Thanks to all of you for your advice. This thread is excellent. It’s why I stay around here. And the spelling/grammar exchange is quite amusing too. Seriously, thank you to all.

Geez Thunder, stay on the topic. Who even cares about this grammar/spelling crap anyway. The nerve…Don’t you know who the legendary kdoc is??

wow, thanks rushmore. I feel better now. I guess as a senior member you can be sarcastic

Who else thinks this way? Hmmm… Interesting perspective…

I haven’t got enough experience to talk about that. Actually I hope that the stronger the muscle gets, the EASIER the gains come!

Last night I was trying to do erect reversed kegels. It worked pretty well, but delaying my orgasm didn’t go that well.

So when I was really hard, I did a reverse kegel and hold is as long as possible. Like I said, the orgasm trick didn’t work as supposed to, but I had a lot of veins and my penis felt very hard as well. I really want to have full control over that muscle so I can do a super kegel during sex or masturbation.

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You’re a piece of work, rushmore.

Thunder is always on topic. Check the logo at the top left corner of any page here, that should clue you in.

The spelling ‘crap’ is enforced because we have an international site; many people are reading English as a second or even third language, so by using standard English we help mitigate confusion to some degree. It’s also easier to translate when that is done.

And also, Thunder just plain likes it that way. :)

It’s his place. When you get your own place you run things the way you want.

So your idea is that you’ll have an easier time getting length gains with a weak BC - or at least a BC that is ‘not strong’?

You should think that through a little. The logic behind it is flimsy.

First of all, why would it be desirable to have a long, but weak erection?

Second of all, reverse Kegeling does not ‘negate’ the effects of the muscle. I believe with a reverse Kegel you are just using a somewhat different group of muscles and therefore using the BC differently.

Lastly, we have many people here who gain length just fine and also have good muscle tone from doing a Kegel regimen. They have long strong erections. I’d say that’s the goal. First priority to higher function, next to desired size is a good rule of thumb.

The idea that reverse Kegels could be of help to promote length gaining is a novel one, though. Anyone else have any ideas on that?

I think the problem you are having has to do with arousal and stimulation. Kegeling is one piece of the puzzle, but the trick to lasting isn’t simply about clamping down on you BC muscle when you’re close to ejaculating.

The Kegel is one technique to be used to help prolong erection and stave off orgasm. There are others as well and you have to find a way to integrate them so they work for you. What is your approach to this?

Have you done much edging?

How is your breathing? Do you find you hold your breath? Does your body tense up as you try to hold back? Can you describe your experience step-by-step?

If you answer the questions it would be a help to give you more specific pointers.

It is very, very difficult, and sometimes impossible, to withhold ejaculation while still thrusting (or with a hot horny woman grinding on you, as the case may be.) In most cases you will need to STOP all movement while performing the “super Kegel.”

It is also difficult to do if you are in all the way to the hilt. If you have good communication with your partner you can ask her to stop or slow down as well. If she stays still and relaxed while you perform the exercise, you may be able to stay balls-deep and pull it off. But I recommend trying the exercise outlined below first, to get a feel for it.

Withdraw to the last inch, or with just the head in, and then perform the “super Kegel” (strongly clenching all of the muscles of the pelvic floor), inhale deeply, hold the breath for a second, then take three to nine very slow, deep breaths while holding the contraction. If need be, relax and re-clench again and repeat the breathing exercise. No thrusting!. The urge to ejaculate should pass, and the erection should subside somewhat (quickly regained by resuming activity.)

If you have to, withdraw completely in order to accomplish this.

A big part of it is in the mind. Try combining the clench with a mental command—Simply say “stop” to yourself as you do the exercise. You are literally willing yourself not to come.

And don’t forget to breathe!

Good luck.

I’d say that’s right on, cheeva.

Good communication is key - even if it’s non-verbal.

When doing a lot of thrusting, particularly fast thrusting, one tends to feel the heat of the friction. This will bring you to the edge very quickly, sometimes more quickly than you realize. You can withdraw, and change positions, and while doing so Kegel hard - even flex the Gluteous Maximus as well. This will pull blood away from your erection which will help to calm things down and then you can resume.

By changing positions you don’t have ask her to stop or slow down too, which might be desirable.

The idea is to find away to ride the wave between stimulation and arousal.

Mr. H.
Ok, here it goes.
No I have not done much edging. Just getting into it and not overly successful. I can go about 10 minutes on the edge and then it is over we go.
During sex it is business as normal (since pe my staying power is substantially better) until we get that “funny feeling”. At that point I try to slow down a bit and think about baseball or checkers or anything as long as it is not pussy related. That is usually when I suggest a new position. During that time is when I try the super kegels. Once we resume it is seconds before I am back to the same edge and usually over. One of the problems is that once we get back to it my wife usually yells something like “do me harder” (cleaned up a bit) and then my mind takes off and baadah bing.

To be honest with you I am not sure if I breathe or not, I know that sounds stupid but I really can’t tell you. And in answer to your question about tensing up… hell yes. On a good evening I might even lose consciousness (over dramatization but you get the point I hope)
My homework is to check breathing during sex? Might take me a few attempts but I will give it the old college try.
That in a nut sack is the step by step process. All help is appreciated

Cheeva,

You said it correctly, as soon as you resume the feeling comes right back.

Maybe I’m wrong but I’m looking to prolong sex for maybe 15 - 20 minutes. You hear about guys who just keep going until they “decide” to orgasm and then they just let it happen…are you kidding me, that would be spectacular.

Again with the breathing thing. How bad is it that I don’t know if I’m breathing but be damn sure I will know the next time if I breathe.

With regards to movement, I think there’s something else that bears mentioning, just in case it’s not completely self-evident to everyone.

You are (or should be) in control of your dick at all times, not the other way around. The decision whether, or when, to come should be yours, not your dicks. You ALWAYS have the option to stop, slow down, change tempo, etcetera. It also drives your partner crazy (in a good way!) to change things up.

While porn is not generally a good template to follow for what great sex is really like, it can be instructive to watch how male porn stars control their arousal level. You see them pull out completely and do several long, slow strokes, pulling out each time, in between bouts of faster thrusting. Or they’ll pull almost all the way out and pause for a few seconds. Sometimes you will see them pull out and squeeze the base or shake their dick for a second before resuming. They’re practicing basic dick control, and so can you!