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I was blown away! Need advice

I have been thinking about your original post and your concern and I think this:

When we get into PE in a serious way, part of the fallout of doing what we do is that we begin to define ourselves by our penises, so focused on them as we become.

We forget in that gain-thing that we are a wealth of other marvelous attributes: our senses of humor, our sensitivities, our warmth and our capacities to share and give to our partners. It is these qualities that attract women (or men) to us primarily. Maybe we need to focus more on them sometimes than on how big we are?


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avocet8

This has been a very humbling experience for me. I also want to thank each and every person so far that has replied to this thread. I hope to be able to support you all more as I intend to be more active with my posting here. I cant explain how appreciative I am for the responses.

Reading all the replies has really genuinely made me accept what happened and I am ready to move ahead with this girl. I did speak with her tonight on the phone and I didn’t mention it, but I felt good when I got off the phone with her. I guess it was foolish to feel the way I did but as most of us know it is a sensitive subject when dealing with our manhood.

BTW I did ask her if she thought I was small and got the stock answer of course. ( Are women all in some kind of union together?) But hey I know she wants me and that’s good enough. From here on out when I bang her I’m gonna do it with au-thor-i-ty.

Like a man with a 12x10 pussy punisher!

Don't bring it up or use it on her

Hey guys,

I am going to have to decent a little on this one.

1) Why did she tell him about these toys in the first place. I mean, why not just keep her mouth shut. If I had a girlfriend come over with some harmless toy, I am not going to drop some hint about a toy that I have only to pull out two sets of giant rubber tits five times the size of hers with a little coaxing. I mean, common, she didn’t know that this would make him feel shitty? I just can’t help but wonder if this is just another manifestation of the classic, “your lucky I am with you” relationship maneuver. How many of you guys come across women who have no freaking idea that guys tend to worry about the size of their penises like women do their breasts. They all get the fucking add 3 inches to your dick emails just like we do. They all have some guy or other asking how he measures up. I know some will claim, “Oh, I had no idea guys worry about that.” Makes me want to ask them, “Oh, did you know we put a man on the moon?”

Maybe I am naive.

2) Don’t use it on her. It is my opinion that you would put yourself in a subordinate position by doing so. If this is a power play, it is sort of her winning. Shes the mama, even if she is very submissive in the act.

3) Don’t bring it up because the cat is out of the bag. There is no putting it back. The best and worse that could happen is that she would reassure you that you are all the man she needs. You would then feel safe and secure again. IOW, shes’ your mama.

I don’t know, maybe I am totally wrong here but this is how I see it. I might better understand this if you guys are like 18 or something, but if you are both over 30 and have played the field, I would have to say that your going to have problems with this girl.

Cheers,
PS

Because you watch porn videos that feature girls with massive boobies if one of those girls came along would you leave your girlfriend for her?

penismith,

I can absolutely see your side of it. No I am not naive, I did pretty much assure her beforehand that I wouldn’t care what they were. She brought them out very cautiously. I know I didn’t say that in my post but she did.

She does however as I mentioned before have a large vagina for a girl her size, but then I have been with chunky women that were tight as hell also.
She gets me off, I get her off. She is someone that suffered through 13 years of a cheating marriage and I’ve seen those genuine tears well up in her eyes just talking about it. She respects me and had those toys before she met me I would suspect. Thanks for the input though I have very good powers of observation and no one will put anything like cheating over on me ever again.

Quote
Originally posted by oldpunker
penismith,

I can absolutely see your side of it. No I am not naive, I did pretty much assure her beforehand that I wouldn't care what they were. She brought them out very cautiously. I know I didn't say that in my post but she did.

She does however as I mentioned before have a large vagina for a girl her size, but then I have been with chunky women that were tight as hell also.
She gets me off, I get her off. She is someone that suffered through 13 years of a cheating marriage and I've seen those genuine tears well up in her eyes just talking about it. She respects me and had those toys before she met me I would suspect. Thanks for the input though I have very good powers of observation and no one will put anything like cheating over on me ever again.

You might leave a few pictures of porn stars with massive tits sitting around to level the playing field a bit. Other than that, you sound like you are coping with it okay.

You are a good man, Oldpunker. It shines through even at this troubling moment.

Keep in mind that 99% of her that you love and adore and this insignificant 1% will end up in its proper place.

It sounds like you have found someone very special. Hang on to that. You deserve it.

Thanks Capt. Yeah she is an incredible woman.

This is an incredible forum.

Thanks again.

When I masturbate, I often squeeze my hand in a manner that it is tighter than any vagina I’ll ever find. I enjoy it and think it’s fantastic, yet I still like sex with a real woman much more—even if they’re very loose (I’ve only had one of those). If you girlfriend is enjoying sex with you, don’t worry about the kind of sex she’s having with herself. If you’re concerned that you could be doing more, ask her. Don’t be afraid to have a woman teach you how to pleasure her better than you already do, which I’m sure is quite enough as it is.


"Only enemies speak the truth; friends and lovers lie endlessly, caught in the web of duty". -Roland, in Stephen King's The Last Gunslinger

oldpunker,

Like you see in this thread,

No!! I couldn’t resist

I did confront my ex-gf with the size issue. It was painful, but the worst part was the time in between getting to know that she had bigger than me and the day when I told her I really had a problem with it. Because it REALLY got to me.
I just had to talk to her about it, because my imagination went crazy, seeing things that wasn’t real, like her being with huge guys, screaming and going crazy over their enormous dicks…. So I asked her to be more specific, how much bigger were they, was it better etc. When i had let the cat half ways out of the bag, there was no turning back for me.
It made me feel a lot better when I addressed it, our relationship didn’t suffer from it, she told me that she hadn’t been with someone with a "King’s size- dick", it wasn’t that much bigger. She also said that sex with me was the best she ever had, and that SHE DIDN’T WANT ME TO BECOME ANY BIGGER, and that the PE I do is completely un- necessary. She even said that if I was going to move in with her, she wouldn’t let me do PE, she’d make me have sex with her instead.
She told me many times that she will never lie to me, even if the truth can be painful sometimes, so I believed her. that was a turning point for me.
I wish, however, that I’d never brought it up in the first place. Not until I’d reached my PE goal, which will make me confident when it comes to dick- size, confident enough NOT to be threatened by bigger dicks, anyway.

In your case it’s about a rubber- device. Nonetheless a B I G rubber- device.
You wonder; "Would she prefer me to be 10" x 8"? "Is it better with the toys inside her?" "Has she had someone that big in the past?"
I can understand your feelings here. But your girl loves you, and you beeing here in the first place, indicates that you intend to catch up with the dildos, right? AND you satisfy each other sexually.

So keep working, slowly and steadily, and you’ll gain confidence in your size as you grow, and in the mean time, love her like crazy!

My advice is, if you can put it behind you and it’s not a problem anymore, don’t mention it to her. If you keep thinking about it and it takes away you joy, like it did for me, then adress it. In Norway we have a saying; "Most trolls die when the sun rises". When you adress something you have a problem with, it turns out that you didn’t have anything to worry about. 90% of our worries are unnecessary. Trust me, I’m a worrier.LOL

It’s my humble opinion, anyway.

Good luck!


January 2009: BPEL: 8.6" EG: 5.7"

Goal for 2009: BPEL: 8.75" EG: 6"

Ultimate goal: BPEL: 9" EG: 6.5"

Hey Plunker, no one hereis going to lie to you and tell you that size does not matter. After all that’s why we are all here. But it’s like it’s been said no plastic can replace a real dick. They may ad fun to the situation, and you should partake my pe brother. Remember she is seeing you, proof beyond any doubt, that she needs you!!! End of story. CJ

Quote
Originally posted by oldpunker
penismith,

I can absolutely see your side of it. No I am not naive, I did pretty much assure her beforehand that I wouldn't care what they were. She brought them out very cautiously. I know I didn't say that in my post but she did.

She does however as I mentioned before have a large vagina for a girl her size, but then I have been with chunky women that were tight as hell also.
She gets me off, I get her off. She is someone that suffered through 13 years of a cheating marriage and I've seen those genuine tears well up in her eyes just talking about it. She respects me and had those toys before she met me I would suspect. Thanks for the input though I have very good powers of observation and no one will put anything like cheating over on me ever again.

Based on your response here I don’t think you are a victim. I can also see that my opinion is very much in the minority here so I have to be honest and ask myself why that is. Also, most of them are probably older and more experienced than me. Based on this, I am questioning my assessment that you will have problems with her and that this was a power play.

I would still advise against using them on her or talking with her any more about it. I just don’t see how any good can come from it.

I wish you the best of luck!

Cheers,
PS

>I would still advise against using them on her or talking with her any >more about it. I just don’t see how any good can come from it.

> wish you the best of luck!

Point well taken. I respect your opinion . I have no intention of using the homewreckers on my girl. But I would watch her use them on herself :-) As far as discussion, I haven’t mentioned it and probably never will.

Thanks again.

Thanks. I like posting here. You guys are the coolest. I had been lurking for a long time after I posted my starting/initial gains post. I Plan on being more active here because it’s like a brotherhood. Yup a brotherhood of PE and real life situations. Where can you get that on the net or anywhere else for that matter? betterman.com? eh…

Later,

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