Various methods of overcoming pre-ejaculation.

For a long time i’ve been obsessed with having the staying power and complete control over when I cum. Like many, I started off being a 1 minute man (probably closer to a 30 second man and that was if I was going SLOOOWWW). I’ve come to realize from my own experience and from reading,that staying power is intimately tied with the BC muscle. Many of you know that when you squeeze that muscle the urge too cum becomes much greater quite rapidly. I’m aware of other methods of preventing premature ejaculation (numbing creams, jacking off beforehand, etc) but these are inconvienent and shift the focus away from simply enjoying sex and KNOWING that you are in control and dont have to resort to some “trick” to last for XX amount of time.

In my experience there are 3 ways for ME to delay my orgasm.

1.) Working my BC muscle regularly and practicing squeezing it at the PRECISE moment to prevent ejaculation. Once I do this perfectly the urgency of cumming fades for a while and I can go fast/hard/longer either solo or with my partner. I’ve found this BC squeeze technique much harder to master with a partner however. The con of this technique is you must train the BC to be strong enough AND you must squeeze at the precise moment to prevent cumming. If you dont do it correctly, you might cum anway or some cum might dribble out.

2.) Edging. Stopping ALL movement right as you reach the “point of no return”. For me, if I do this enough times, the urgency of feeling like I am about to come fades away and from then on I can go as fast as I want with my partner untill I finally come (if I choose). This is the technique that I use currently. Sometimes (probably more than 70% of the time) a little bit comes out anway but I still have a normal orgasm at the end. I am unsure of WHY this technique works. Why does the urge to come greatly decrease after you stop all movement enough times? I dont know if its just my youth (I am 21 years old) that allows me to do this? I hope someone else can chime in on this.

3.) And finally what I think COULD be the holy grail of the techniques. Simply MASTERING when the BC muscle contracts or not. When I go relatively slow during sex, I can focus on relaxing the BC muscle…but only for a while. Eventually if I become more mentally aroused or start more vigorous thrusting the BC involuntarily contracts and the urge to cum greatly increases. It is my opinion that the techniques of “think about baseball or your grandmother or do long division in your head” work too some degree because you arent thinking about the great feelings and your BC relaxes on its own. However during vigorous sex its hard too keep thinking about grandma…and why would you want too? I feel sex should be a fun, enjoyable experience, not a time too think of anything BUT sex to avoid cumming.

So how does one go about being able to completely control the BC muscle? Practice, practice and more practice? Maybe. However, I dont know if in the heat of some amazing sex when she (or he if you swing that way) is moaning and thrashing about, you can make yourself relax that muscle. That is why, for me, I continue to use method number two. For reasons unknown to me, if I pause, stop all thrusting ENOUGH times, the feeling to cum dissipates and I can go as fast and hard as I want for quite some time. My fear is that it is only my youth that is allowing me to do this and eventually when I am older my erection will go down after I do my pausing routine. Also, my girl only orgasms (vaginally) when I tease her extensively followed by SLOW, deep thrusting. The problem is I get the feeling to cum and have to start doing my pausing technique which semi-ruins the feelings she is having. I’d love to be able to better relax my BC for these first sessions, and rely on my other method if she wants the hard/fast routine.

I would love to hear anyones comment on my theories and methods as well as my concerns. /breathes :)

Great post! I agree with you, as I have the exact same problem lately. Maybe this is completely irrelevant but one thing I have noticed is(I’m really big into weight lifting) is when I’m the strongest and most explosive for my body weight(don’t do cardio at all just lift as heavy as possible) My orgasims happen almost instantly, without warning almost, I edge too. I have a strong PC muscle as I can stop cum but still have an orgasm most of the time but my erection usually goes away unless I pound as hard and fast as possible even then I cum again within a minute of doing this. At times when I’m in good cardio vascular shape, (been cutting or just changing things up in my routine to get a better heart) I can honestly last just about as long as I want and when I do get the urge to cum I can see it from a mile away and slow down or pull out and change possitions. I went from always giving my girl an orgasm sometimes 3 if I go down on her first then give her two more by sex, to lasting no more than a few minutes of SLOW sex. This could be all in my head as on some subconcious level I believe this to be true therefore it becomes true… Or it could be all about the nerves. Right now my nervous system is tuned for quick, strong, heavy movements, so they shoot signals fast and agressively, catch my drift?? It’s like all of a sudden I’ll be inside her with a good hardon then boom the feeling overtakes me and I bust a nut in a flash if I keep it in there a fraction of a second to long…

Maybe this has nothing to do or little to do with it, could be mental.. Now that my PC or BC is strong I still cum fast as ever it’s almost like I’ve trained it to contract when I feel stimulation and I have an explosive nervous system it’s not a good mix..

I just really wish I could pound the shit outta my GF like my body is capable of, and not have to worry about my lame BC firing to fast you know what I mean… SUCKS ASS!!

Maybe weI need to train the BC to not contract hard but train them for endurance like a distance runner slow and steady. When I do kegals I realize I’m contracting as hard as I can, maybe this is a no no for me.. Idk but I’m looking forward to becoming sexualy mature so I can pound pussy like I know I can.

Good stuff. I would also suggest learning some basic meditation techniques, especially breath oriented. If you are brand new to this anything will do. Spend an hour using Google and find some very basic breathing meditations and give it a try.

Another thing I thought of was that my ex roomate whom I work with aswell is known for his “amazing” performance in the sac. Could be experience, yeah, but also he’s really big into running and has ran marthons..

I’m gonna try that edging thing. I’ve tried every other thing, the trying to control the BC muscle, the breathing, the trying to think of something else, and all of them failed miserably.