Vets weigh in..

Where do I start?

First of all, I completed the NoFapNovember challenge along with the NoNutNovember chalenge. Some of the ideologies I’ve heard floating around about them have speculated that by completing the challenge it, will increase your sex drive along with other things, by raising your testosterone levels. Some other ideologies have centered around porn addiction hindering a mans ability to be attracted to actual women.

I probably should have done more research on the matter beforehand but, I’ve been crazy busy and, there’s really just not much concrete science on the subject.

Here is my personal experience on the matter:

The first week was absolute hell. All I could think about were the most hardcore degrading pornographic images that I was typically consuming. I was crazy horny all the time but, I was horny for porn. I would look at women in public and, have extremely pornographic thoughts about them. It was a stark contrast to the week prior when I virtually never felt this way.

The second week I started to notice some of the changes other men said would be coming such as: excellent morning wood and, night wood, more intense attraction to actual women, more frequent and, higher quality erections and, more overall drive in life. This was very refreshing. I got a lot of work done in my personal life and, started speaking to women more in real life.

The third week my body and, entire life force had a metamorphosis. Call me dramatic if you must but, I honestly cannot describe it as anything less than that. My drive was, at that point, higher than it had ever been, at any point in my life. My level of self actualization and, self awareness were, at lifetime highs. I found what I believe is, my true purpose in life and, I discovered what I truly want out of a relationship.

Now before I can tell you about week 4, I have to say I haven’t been with a women in over a year. The last time I was, the sex was just overall bad. I blame myself entirely. I was(am) obese, as such my eq was terrible AND, my penis was small(average? 5x5). It kind of fueled what I now believe was a porn addiction that I used as a coping mechanism for my small penis and, ed. I had been attracted to women but, only as sexual objects.

So then comes along week 4. My testosterone levels are sky high. My body’s been physically aching for touch non-stop for days. I crave the taste of flesh. As I look inward I see that my taste has changed completely as a man. I no longer want this fake porn look of perfection, I crave hot sex. It’s all I think about. My penis is hard all week long.

At this point, I’m talking to women in the real world, with new found confidence and, vigor. I’m having no problems whatsoever, with confidence or displaying direct sexual energy. My libido is basically 17 at this point and, I’m using these dating apps almost around the clock.

I finally arranged a lunch date with a girl on the 30th. It was for a couple days after the fact on a Sunday. The way that I kept thinking about her and, the date made me super hard and, distracted me so bad that I couldn’t work. I told her that and, told her that I wanted to hook up that day.

This is such a stark contrast from October 31st it’s not even real. That me would have never. That me would have paid for like 3 expensive cringy dates and made some half pass IF, he even got the number, IIIIIIIF he even said ANYTHING.

Naturally she said yes and, I picked her up and, brought her back to my place.

My change in taste changed my sexual behavior completely.

I used to do that whole netflix and chill bullshit. Make a pass, run the bases, makeout all the way to the bedroom type of shit. No. Not this time. I brought her into my room. As soon as she put her purse down I interrupted her sentence by making out with her.

I stayed on her. I undressed her completely over the course of a couple minutes while making out with her furiously. I was completely dressed. I made sure to make a comment of this.

I then started to undress, slowly, while playing with her with my hands and, making out with her. As I was completely undressed I made her cum the first time. I then went down on her and, made her cum almost immediately the second time. It boggled me how much making her cum turned me on as, before I kind of saw it as a chore.

I stayed on her while I put condom on and, as I made her cum the third time I climbed on top and, fucked her missonairy through it. It was absolutely fantastic. She rolled through orgasms the whole time we had sex which was maybe 45 minutes or a little bit longer.

This brings now brings me to sexual health part of this post.

After she came maybe the 5th or 6th time, she went down on me. I asked her if I could cum in her mouth and, she said yes. She then proceeded to give me the best, most focused, appreciative, head I have ever received. This head was so good it would have made me cum like a racehorse a month prior.

I couldn’t cum.

We have since had sex like 6 times since then and, I still have not been able to cum from either the sex or the head. I’ve told her everything that I outlined in this post; from the porn addiction, to NoNutNovember and, she’s been very supportive.

Right now what I’m wondering is; should I just masturbate once to kind of, kickstart the ejaculatory process and triggers or, just let nature work it out? I really do want to experience this now 44 day load with her as I’m sure it will be the largest volume and, most powerful orgasm I’ll experience in quite some time, probably until next December.

Also, I’ve suffered from some ED at times and, other times I’ve been absolutely hard as steel, like 11 out of 10 erections. Does anyone else have any experience with that and, what steps can I take to become more consistant.

Stay away from the masturbarion. Keep playing with your girl and you will eventually cum. I feel sorry for her when you do, lol.

Take the focus off of ejaculation and enjoy the moment. It will happen when it’s the right time.

Perhaps you are suffering from the “death grip”.

Is she tight?

Just to rule this out, are you guys drinking alcohol before you hook up? Btw, it’s fine if you are, but that could certainly make it a little more difficult to ejaculate, at least for some men, including myself.

Great advice from Titleist. And also the fact that you seem open with her on an emotional and honesty level will also help you achieve climax.

Before I was with my wife of now a year and a half, I had not been with a woman for 7 years! Imagine the complications then! It was difficult for me as all I knew of sex was masturbation and porn, which I have both ruled out of my sexual activities. Porn because it is unhealthy for me mentally and physically, and masturbation simply because it is unneeded.

Also, I believe alcohol can inhibit sensation and make good satisfactory sex more of a challenge.

Thanks guys!

Titleist,

Thanks for your reply! That’s what I’ve been trying to do. I’ve done no masturbation and, consumed no porn since before November. I’ve been trying to relax but, it’s been crazy. The reoccurring ED situation has added a small aspect of anxiety but, I know stressing over it won’t help.

ehlolol,

Thank you for your reply!,
The tightest I’ve ever encountered. I was trying to stretch her out a little bit once beforehand and, she just flat out pushed me out. She has also told me that past lovers have accused her of pushing the blood out of their penises. I wouldn’t have believed her had she not done that to me some 30 minutes later.

LittleEngine,

Thank you for replying!,

She drinks every time. I drank once with her and, my eq was absolutely trash. It was awful cause my horniness was through the roof. I now limit myself to two drinks absolutely max. I prefer not to and, for her to drink liberally and, I told her specifically it’s because she gets super horny and, it has a negative affect on my eq.

lapsslap,

Thank you for your comment!,

I think you really hit the nail on the head. I haven’t been in a meaningful relationship in so long I almost completely forgot what it was like. I can look back now and, clearly see that I developed an unhealthy porn addiction that, led to me masturbating instead of pursuing women. I feel like this caused some damage in terms of my libido and, overall attraction to women. Now that my taste is now aligned to reality and, not fantasy, I’m having a time trying to get my body to realign with it.

Thanks again to all for replying!

You can try some supplements if you are interested. Some have helped me regaining my confidence and deal with ED. The main remedy in my book, however, remains talking about it and accepting it. If you an your partner accept the possibility of it happening, it already puts less stress on the both of you, and then if it does, a little patience from the both can be all that is required.
I love a glass of wine, but when I want to have the best sex, I wait until after. A glass can help loosen me up, but the line is thin and in most cases I just find the sex is better without! My wife will have a glass or two and then knows what to expect when I tell her I’ll wait…

And just my two cents, I don’t think refraining from ejaculation of extensive periods, say over a week is in any way beneficial. I understand the edging and holding off as a game. It can be exciting! But No Porn is always a good idea, for me at least!

Thank you lapsslap for your reply!,

I agree with you. I’ve been very upfront with her about my EQ and, the problems I’ve been having. She’s been very supportive and, engaged as PE in general is very foreign to most women. I told her my complete PE journey, my experience here at ThundersPlace and, everything.

The first time I experience my erection quality started to fail, I was certain it was from overtraining (which I still believe to be true). The next day, I told her this. She was very quiet but, afterwords she poured out about how honest I was and, how appreciative she was of that.

The last time we had sex, I hadn’t jelqed or stretched besides pisspulls (one per, strict). It was honestly the best sex I’ve ever had. I was hard as a rock the entire time. I was noticeably bigger to myself before I penetrated her vaginally because I normally don’t fill a magnum all the way around. This one was perfectly snug.

When I took it out the first time, I swear I wanted to measure it right there. It was remarkably bigger, possible half an inch or so longer almost as much around. I could easily see my dorsal vein through the condom, which was a lifetime first for me. I fucked her so savagely. I was choking her and, flipping her into different positions. I put her legs up by her head and, gave her the first orgasm from actual intercourse that she’s had from me.

I was so turned on. We had sex for about 3 and a half hours. I stopped counting her orgasms. I never even came close.

It’s been a strange ride but, I am having a lot of fun.

This reminds me of sex I used to have.

I didn’t get back into orgasming with women until I was allowed to give some harder core (still safe) face fucking. Then it got to be more regular but still not every encounter. Jitters certainly doesn’t help. So, I would give it more time.