Do I have a chance of being average?
I’ve been lurking here on and off for around 5 months, trying to figure out if there was anything I could do about the pitiful size of my dick. It has caused me some pretty severe depression, and it kind of controls all aspects of my life. I think part of this is that I had it made fun of when I was younger, both in a school locker room setting as well as by my girlfriend at the time. Because of this, I became reclusive and never showed my true face to people, instead being whatever they wanted/needed of me at the time. I also gained a metric fuck-ton of weight, which caused my self image to become even worse. Now I am a 20 year old college student who has many acquaintances, but very very few real friends because I think that if I get to close to anyone, especially women, they will learn about my disgusting little dick and will make fun of me both to my face as well as behind my back. I have never had a relationship after my high-school fling because of the same reason. I think that even if I were to get intimate with someone, I will only end up disappointing when it really matters, and I will eventually either be broken up with or cheated on. These thoughts have more than once driven me to suicide, and I have had 3 unsuccessful attempts at taking my own life. I am now on an anti-depressant called Bupropion, which is a generic brand of Wellbutrin XL. The dosage is 300MG once a day in the mornings.
At my heaviest I was 349lbs. I am 6’2”. I’ve tried to help my body image stuff by going on a strict dieting regiment (also working out more now since I don’t feel so terrible physically). I started this diet June 4th, 2017 and as of today I weight 244.6lbs. The diet was a prescribed diet by my general practitioner, and is called the Nutrimed diet, also known as a VLCD. VLCD stands for Very Low Calorie Diet, and starting out is consistently around 800-1200 calorie intake a day. I had hoped that the weight loss would make my dick seem a little less pitiful but it just ended up making my anxiety about it as well as self image worse. I didn’t know if I should continue pursuing my weight loss goal of 200lbs because the better you look the more likely a woman might find you worthy enough to consider dating, and I don’t want to be laughed at or have word get out that I have a tiny penis again.
My current measurements before P.E. Are BPEL: 5” MEG: 4”. Do any of you think that I will ever have a chance of even being average or “normal”? I really just wanna be something that can make a woman feel something instead of pity, disgust, or disdain. I have thoughts of grandeur of maybe someday being 6.5” BPEL and 5” EG, but I know that is very unlikely. I’ve tried a few of the exercises out to see what they would feel like but I have a very hard time gripping my penis for basic stretches without making the head of my penis feel painful, and I can’t really use both hands to jelq because I’m too small and my fat pad still gets in the way. I was also wondering if I should try and lose the rest of the weight to make P.E. Easier to do, or if I should be doing them both simultaneously. I have also thought about liposuction on my pubic mound, because as of right now my fat pad sticks out farther than what I have left of my belly, and it makes me even more distressed because it makes my already tiny penis look even smaller, often turtling into the fat and giving me a mangina.
Sorry about the rambling post, I just really needed some closure about this and its easier to talk about your feelings electronically than it is to try and bring it up to a psychologist or something.
Last edited by Jeffro278 : 11-01-2017 at .