Edging induced trauma
Hi, everyone! I tried to post this in the trauma section but apparently I can’t do this as this is my first post. I’m the member of the community since June 2016.
I need your thoughts and advice on what kind of trauma I might have.
My story started in April 2015. I was 18 and I was finishing my first year at university. The blow came when I suddenly found out that my girlfriend (we’d been together for 4 years) cheated on me. It was a bit depressing as you can imagine. Still, I had morning woods as usual and raging night woods, I could keep an erection for how long I wanted, with any kind of thoughts in my head and what is more important I could get it up at any time, whenever I wanted.
May 2015. After two weeks of a mild depression I decided that it was time to move on. I phoned to one of my friends and asked her if I could come to her place to watch something together and stuff. She accepted. I was so horny the day before I went to her that I edged like for 2 hours without cumming with a raging erection that I had at that time.
So I came to her the next day, we drank a bit of wine then we started kissing. I didn’t have any insecurities or anything, I was subconsciously very self-confident being sure that everything down there was already ready. But suddenly, I felt that I didn’t have an erection. I went to the toilet and saw that I was super turtled, cold and so small I had never seen it to be like that before. Finally, that day I managed to get it up but not to a 100 percent erection. She refused to have sex, she masturbated me a little bit without me cumming.
I came home being down about all that but the thing was that all that time I had not cummed. So I decided to masturbate and when cumming I had a burning feeling at the left side of my penis (now I suppose maybe it was veins). I was frightened as hell.
I slept on it and when I woke up I found out that my erection was kind of sloppy and quickly subsiding. I still could masturbate and cum but as soon as I stopped rubbing it, the erection subsided. The burning feeling at the left side was gone. The most frightening thing was that from that morning on my dick suddenly had a left curve.
I thought that maybe it would heal by itself. But it didn’t as you see and that was back in May 2015.
In April 2016 I had sex with a prostitute, cause I wanted to see if I could still use it with a woman. I could, but after 10 minutes my erection subsided and that left curve was still there.
That same month I went to urologist after reading about Peyronie’s. I had an ultrasound and it said I didn’t have any. So the urologist could do nothing about it.
I began to have insecurities as I was not big (NBPEL 5,7 and EG 4,7) but what killed me was that I could not have that raging erection at any time I wanted as I used to have.
I also want to add that I had always been masturbation addicted doing it like 2-3 times daily.
In June 2016 I found this forum and decided that as I did not have that A-erection anymore, at least I would try to make myself bigger.
I started with a Newbie routine, mostly jelqing. By December 2016 I managed to move up to 6 inches in NBPEL. Which may be some natural growth, I was 20 at the time.
Then I bought an extender (which I used for a month) and a water pump (used it here and there every second month).
Finally, in January 2017 I found a girlfriend. We have been having a lot of sex, the erection sometimes subsides and I have an impression that it is not that hard as it used to be but it could have been much worse.
In summer 2017 I we weren’t together for 3 months and I decided to use that time for PEing. After adding downward stretching to my routine I managed to move up to 6.8 inches NBPEL and the next time we had sex with my girlfriend I had much more pleasure than with 5.7 that I used to have.
The thing is I heard that when you have some EQ problems you cannot gain in girth and over about 15 months of doing PE I didn’t (which is not abnormal either, I admit).
So I want to hear you thoughts guys on what kind of trauma I might have. I will have Doppler test in a month or two, I do not have the possibility now.
I very appreciate this forum for all the information I have got (especially that of Thoughtful gold).
P.S. Also, I watched a video where somebody described types of dicks and the first type was a bit like mine, with a little curve, so it said: “that dick belongs to a man addicted to masturbation, he experiences some erection problems during sex”, that sort of thing. So I was like- maybe it is a sort of common problem for those who masturbate a lot?