Guys, don't let this happen to you...stay focused on PE dammit!

Chickenchoker,

Very powerful stuff, man… excellent advice.

Perhaps if I had taken your advice to view a girl as a part of my life, I would have had more long-term relationships. I usually let them go too easy if/when they start to lose interest. Some female friends have told me that this comes across as being uncaring, but I always thought it better not to fight to keep them in something they may not want to be in.

That “lose interest” behavior might just be a perception on your part or maybe it’s just that we can’t ACTIVELY care for our significant-other 24 hrs. a day with all the daily pressures of life upon us. Sometimes my wife sounds like an immature bitch when I call her at her work but I know she is a nurse working a 12-hr shift and doesn’t want to be bothered so I just let it go unless it gets to be a hair too much.

Sometimes we have to find out what they really want, what makes them tick and then perform whatever it takes to show them that we really care.

My wife is 8 years younger than I and what kept her interest in me was my willingness to change my clothing line ( fashion ) since I was still stuck in the mid-80’s ( Miami Vice era ). I showed up at her door with what she recommended and since then she saw me in a different light.

I think you’re right. I’m learning so much about women. Although we all are essentially human, women and men seem to communicate completely differently. There have been times when I thought a girl could care less about me when she was actually attracted to me. The same thing works in the opposite direction. I’ve had a girl ask for my number to find out later that she was ENGAGED!!

I think that the “lose interest” may indeed be my perceptions.

Procrastination in general is because of fear, fear of failure, fear of effort or work, fear of looking bad or fear of what people will think or say. For example, chickenchocker said he avoided sex most of his life because of his self view of his so called small penis. The reason why he avoided sex was because of fear, he feared what his partner would think of his penis, he feared her reaction and chose not get hurt. Im sorry to make an example of you CC my friend but let me just say that your avoidance was very normal. Its built into our nervous system and part of our conditioning. The brain will choose safety over potential pain or danger, our brains have been pre-set for survival its called our survival mechanism. As humans we choose safety, pleasure, comfort, rest and recreation over work, chores, pain and danger. Even though its fixed in our nervous system it can be changed. We must recognise why we arnt doing what we should be doing and deal with the cause. That doesnt mean answering that question by saying ”because im lazy” your lazy because you fear, you fear the work or the outcome. Think about it, if i was to give J386 a 100% guarantee that if he was to approach that girl he would get her (lets say i knew somehow) im sure J386 would have approached her because he knew the outcome. He has nothing to loose and all to gain. J386 didnt know the outcome and didnt want to risk looking bad by bruising his pride and he also feared rejection. The end result being avoidance of pain.

What kept her interest was that you changed your clothingline?

jelqking,

While I agree with you that *sometimes* procrastination is because of fear, I know personally that this is not always the case. I personally procrastinate with things that will increase my income, improve my body: things that I dream of, not fear, and things that I have done in the past and *know* I can do again. However, getting things done is another ball of wax entirely.

While fear may explain some procrastination, from experience, there seems to be more to this beast.

I’m one with you guys, I mean I’d do anything to put a project off, however I have not had any work to do in a few months and so have not bothered to tidy up my flat, it’s a mess, it stinks, I don’t wash dishes up, I let the mold grow over my kitchen, do I care ? NO!

However I know very well that if I had to do some kind of work, I would end up tidying my flat up to put it off, I truly believe that I am self-destructive :(

VERY VERY, self destructive,

I mean there’s this girl of my dreams that I think any sane man would have pulled by now, what do I do? Get VERY drunk whenever I see her and scare the hell out of her!
I’m a frickkin nutcase!

This also leads onto my Friday of hell (last Friday) that I haven’t recovered form :(

One thing that helps is Classical Conditioning (from Pavlovs (sp?) famous experiments on dogs). Essentially Pavlov noticed that dogs salivate when they see food and in anticipation of food. For instance, he would play a bell and then give food to the dog. The dog would soon start to salivate at the sound of the bell, even with no food.

I feel that CC also works for humans. People suggest that if you’re trying to quit smoking, everytime (without exception) that you get a craving, drink an 8 ounce glass of water. I expect that the reasoning behind that is that we begin to equate our cravings with drinking water (something that’s relatively harmless). Done enough times and we re-wire our brains.

I suspect that procrastination may be a negative form of CC. In other words, in the past, I have trained myself to clean when I get the urge to do work. This is probably why I unkowningly procrastinated. Of course, the power behind this concept is to understand what to change to correct this situation: simply re-train yourself.

Recently I’ve trained myself to hang whenever I come to Thunders. Now, every time I come, I get a HUGE urge to hang, and PE is no longer a problem. I’ve been incredibly consistant of late.

The same can apply to talking to women, doing work, working out, or quitting smoking. Try it out. I’m sure you’ll be pleasently surprised. Don’t hesitate to post your CC ‘routine’ and fill us all in.

We were just unlucky enough to train ourselves into self-destructive habits, but all of that can change TODAY.

Good luck, man. Keep me posted.

Thanks tug, things werent quite as bad as they seemed, I was suffering from unbelievable paranoia. Apparently we were hitting it off quite well (for my standards) I think i’ll post asking for some relationship advice later on, this is a real crucial time.

I also have a tangible reason to PE now and sort myself out :)

No problemo. I’m glad to hear that things weren’t as bad as they seemed. Paranoia, like anxiety, has to be one of the worst states a human can be in.

Now about the relationship advice: I wouldn’t accept any from myself. While I believe I give good advice (who doesn’t) I am not actually great at realationships so either a) I don’t follow my own advice or b) my advice stinks!

Anyway, the Classical Conditioning works. I’ve quit smoking using the water drinking technique. Every time I even THINK about having a smoke, I drink water. Coincidentally, water is doing wonders for my PEnis. This morning I measured exactly 7.75” had a thicker erection than normal (when rock-solid). To give a little perspective, I was slightly below 7.75” some days ago, so I have made some minute gains in that time..

I’m excited about CC… I’m using it with my procrastination and it’s working WONDERS! Nothing can stop me now…

This is an excellent thread! My procrastination goes back as far as I can remember.(now 27yrs. young). I have never conquered it TOTALLY. Although there is some light at the end of the procrastinating tunnel, because with some issues in my life I have overcome this dreaded disease! Unfortunately, procrastination and PE go hand in hand with me as well.(All IS LOST, ALL IS LOST!), well maybe not. I’ve gotten much better and I am still new at this. I became bored within the first few days and thought to myself maybe I should quit now to minimize disappointment later on. Then I felt this big swift kick in the ass, (better known as my conscious), saying you fucking idiot, you have already found this site, you have already set a desirable goal, (7.5 x 6), and you have already STARTED!! Quitting now for ANY procrastinator in my opinion means inevitable disappointment along with a slight feeling of yet another FAILURE. Also I have found that dynamite sex with my wife,(who just loves my dick so much!), contributes to a lack of desire to PE. You know because the sex is so good right. Yet I have to remind myself that my original reason for my very first jelq tug was because she has had BIGGER and I’ve always wanted BIGGER. (Currently 6.25 x 4.75+). Initial desire and self understanding as to my original reasons and desires drives me to keep on jelqing. This is not information any of you do not already know, but sometimes some of us just need to be reminded. Thanks for reading and All of you, please keep posting. “If you help just one, even if its only you, you have helped the whole world!!!

Eh.. taking some time off isn’t too bad.

I’ve hit the 8” BP mark.. and now I have a live-in SuicideGirl.
I’m taking some times to enjoy my gains.

Be back with you guys in a few months.
In the meantime, wish me happy shagging.

Happy shagging! :spin:

Maybe Tube can experiment on getting dogs to PE when they hear a bell :)