Dry Orgasms

Hey all,

I just wanted to share that after 15 years of practicing ejaculation control and some Dao, as described in the excellent cheeva’s thread Dick Control: A Primer, I unexpectedly learned dry orgasms. Not that I haven’t had a lot of fun before, and not that I now have much more fun, but this is just a completely different stuff. Way different. Let me explain my experience:

Ejaculation control, edging, riding the plateau, all feel good. You can have sex for hours, and at a different pace after some practice. You will feel lots of energy, and after half an hour of such sex you will feel a good partial relief, and after an hour or two of it you should even experience a satisfaction. This is good stuff. Gives you lots of energy, sense of well-being, confidence, and huge bonus points with women.

Dry orgasms seems to me just like the usual wet orgasms. Except no ejaculation. I have to keep the prostate tight, but also be relaxed to not have the muscle spasms that cause the ejaculation. Weird, and I never believed it was possible, but turns out I have been so very close to this for years without realizing it.

How do I do it? When going over the PONR (point of no return) I just relax, but I keep the prostate tight, and channel the energy up my spine (see the cheeva’s thread). I get an orgasm, which feels pretty much like a normal orgasm, and I get an immediate relief with some loss of erection if I am fully satisfied. The standard thing. The main thing that is different about dry orgasms is that I am not getting the full-blown fatigue that I get after wet orgasms.

I can have 3-5 of these distinct dry orgasms in a session, if I try. Masturbation or real sex, doesn’t matter. When masturbating, I can pause for 3-5 seconds, then stimulate myself a little more and have another full orgasm right away. Really cool stuff, I thought only a few girls can do something like this. The best is getting an oral while having a dry orgasm. The girl does not change her pace because there is no risk for her to choke or drown, LOL, and the oral stimulation is so gentle that I can relax better and have more fun. Try it!

I am just a newbie in this area, so maybe others can share their thoughts and experiences. I think I have one muscle tight but most others relaxed. Maybe the prostate tight, and all others relaxed. Or maybe the prostate and the PC muscle tight, and all others relaxed.

I had experiences similar to this many times before, but I wasn’t doing it right. Somehow it my brain I had it that if I go over the PONR, then ejaculation is inevitable, and stopping the semen flow is a bad thing. I tried stopping the semen, but I was contracting way too many muscles, and it did not feel good at all, and it did not work very well, and it hurt, and it felt terrible, and I wished I’d rather ejaculated. What I did not do is relax properly and channel the energy up the spine. I am doing it better now.

I think it’s an interesting subject, but it just seems like high risk to me after reading Kingpole’s progress thread where he mentions some people can completely fry their nervous system if they go overboard with ballooning / dry orgasms.

Good post! I think the key point is channel the energy up your spine!

I had experiences similar feeling before, but I push it too close to the PONR to trigger my orgasms. Now I will try stop a bit earlier from PONR and get my orgasms by channel the energy up my spine.

I wonder if in fact the sperm goes into the bladder?

I mention this because if you hold your penis tight when ejaculating, that is what happens, and then you pee out the sperm at your next visit to the loo.

That can happen sometimes, but if you start the “keeping the prostate tight” thing (which is a strong pulling kegel, incorporating the anal sphincters) early enough, the semen doesn’t move into the urethra and thus stays out of the bladder.

One of these days, I’ll get it.

Cheeva, I have my kegels down these days pretty damn good. I can kegel right before the PONR and completely hold all of my fluids in and have a dry orgasm and still be hard afterwards.

BUT, I find I have to discontinue all stimulation in order to do this. Are you seriously capable of continuing thrusting while kegeling to hold back your cum and have a dry one and keep on thrusting? That just seems inhumane haha. Teach me if you can please. :p

I love to edge, but I just can’t do this stuff without ejaculating. Oh well, at least I enjoy the practice…

spaghettidick,

That’s great, man! Stopping all stimulation is fine. With practice, you should be able to continue stimulation while going over the PONR, but thrusting is indeed very tricky. I usually stop thrusting. If I’m practicing solo, I will continue mild stimulation through the orgasm, or if I’m with a partner and she’s on top, she can keep on riding (but in all honesty I’ll often have to have her slow down.) The thing is, you do have to really cut back or stop the stimulation for awhile afterwards in order to cycle, so you can continue.

For others trying to figure this out, I should maybe talk a little more about the kind of “kegel” you do to achieve a dry orgasm. A kegel is involved, but really it has to do with the inner sphincter. Sorry for going on about the ass so much, but it really is the key to this. while doing a strong kegel (clenching as tight as you can), you should also clench you anal sphincters in such a way that your tail bone is pulled inward, and it should feel like you’re giving your prostate an internal massage. Practice doing these like you would normal kegels, i.e. when flaccid, and do reps. There should be a mildly pleasurable sensation in the prostate when you clench and release. When you contract the anus, really pull it up and into your body in a kind of sucking/pulling clench. Also, do the contractions on the inhale and release on the exhale. As you inhale and clench, visualize the “energy” being pulled or sucked from your genitals and into your spine through your tail bone. With time, you should actually be able to feel this. Or, you can visualize the energy ‘swirling’ up and around your prostate. The main thing is to think “in and up.”

When you actually try doing this right at the PONR, you hold the contraction through the PONR and orgasm, and continue holding until the orgasm subsides.

TIP: Remember to rest your tongue lightly on the roof of your mouth behind the teeth when you do this. (Just in case that crown chakra stuff is real, I don’t want anyone frying their brains on ching chi.) (:
And afterwards, do some kind of cycling or spreading meditation/exercise as outlined in “Dick Control,” please.

Good luck.

One more point that I think is important, and which I don’t think has been touched on yet. In order to pull off a truly dry orgasm, and not have a "retrograde ejaculation" where the semen goes into the bladder, you need to do the strong pulling kegel/anal clench thing right before the emission stage. The emission stage is the first stage of orgasm or right before the PONR (expulsion stage.) These stages are discussed on this site about edging . As they describe edging, you are cutting off ejaculation during the emission stage, but before expulsion (ejaculation), which means that the semen has entered the urethra. If you end an edging session without ejaculation, semen will be ‘loaded’ in your urethra and either end up in your bladder or expelled during urination.

In order to properly pull off a dry orgasm, you need to start contracting/pulling the energy in and up just before the emission stage or right as the emission stage is beginning so the semen doesn’t move into the urethra.

If one can master the great seal one can stop ejaculation during the process. I find this increases the amount of dry orgasms. It has become so easy to just hold the kegel it is automatic. I start out lite and pull in tight when needed. To me this triggers the contraction like a wet ejaculation but it is dry. And it seems I can induce them at will.

It is hard to explain.

Wow, so many posts in one day! My experience has been exactly like cheeva describes. I do not ejaculate into my bladder. I would not have this much sperm to ejaculate so many times in such a short period of time, if I was indeed ejaculating anything, LOL! And I can’t do any thrusting while at it, although I can take some light stimulation in the middle of it, which feels very good.

That “frying the brain” is interesting. I haven’t paid attention where my tongue is during all this. I do not think it is there because sometimes I have to scream very loud. I will remember to start putting it there if I smell something burning, LOL!

Kingpole is onto something. You do have to hold a light kegel all from the beginning. Else you will start oozing too much precum and even some sperm, which will make it too hard to keep it “dry”.

Interesting though, these dry orgasms do not feel to me energy-boosting like edging, or riding the plateau. After a few of these I start feeling tired and very content. So I try to delay these. I remember one book was saying something that you should do 1,000 thrusts, or maybe 5,000 before an orgasm. I do not remember if they were talking about a dry one, or about ejaculation. Anyone wants to chime in?

Yes, but it’s a different kind of tiredness/contentedness than what follows a normal ejaculation, is it not? I think the overall charge in the body is higher, but diffused by cycling between higher and lower states of arousal.
Edging and riding the plateau feel more ‘energizing’ because the energy stays concentrated and focused in the genitals, whereas after a dry orgasm the energy is diffused throughout the body, so it’s not as obvious (although the same amount of ‘energy’ is still present in the body.) After three or four cycles, I think the body reaches a kind of energy equilibrium where it’s content and satisfied to sit at the new overall energy/charge plateau. Next session, you should be coming into it with a higher base level of energy/charge.

It’s encouraging to see so many guys getting deep into this and having success. :thumbs:

Yes, Cheeva, it is definitely different than a wet one in the fact that my dick will remain hard and I will be able to continue to fuck instead of have that 5 minute period where my dick is so sensitive to touch.

Oh and thanks.

Yes, absolutely! Normal ejaculation sucks if I haven’t been riding the plateau for a few hours, straight or cumulatively, prior to it. I never liked ejaculation all that much, and now with dry orgasms I can honestly say I think I do not even need to have a regular orgasm with ejaculation ever in order to get a full relief and a full satisfaction.

My sexuality has changed over the years. In the very beginning just some mild but extended edging sessions were very satisfying, and I felt lots and lot of energy in my whole body, not just in the genitals. Then, when I became better at controlling my ejaculation, I enjoyed many years of great and very intense long sex sessions. The high intensity of it alone, with all the numerous muscle spasms that I experienced in the process, felt way more satisfying than any number of wet orgasms that I could possibly have. I had tremendous amounts of energy in my whole body. But the energy in the genitals was still building up, and even though I was able to channel most of it out, I still had to shoot a good load every once in a while in order to feel more or less normal again. After it, I guess as I was getting older, the general levels or energy reduced both in the genitals an in the body. The overall result was interesting. I was able to have sex for hours and days without ejaculation, and that drove most women crazy, but it also somehow felt somewhat less satisfying to me than before. It felt somewhat more mechanical, routine, more like masturbation rather than sex, in a sense that the intensity was lower and sometimes not high enough to feel the overall satisfaction and the associated sense of well-being. It was still good, but not as intense as when I was younger, and full of cum, and felt like I would explode or fry my brain if I do not shoot twice a week. So before I learned dry orgasms, relieving the genitals from the built-up energy through ejaculation often felt not very healthy.

Well, now that I learned dry orgasms, I have that problem solved. But I have to be careful. It feels like I should still ride the plateau for at least an hour, straight or cumulatively, prior to a dry orgasm. If I have a dry orgasm too early, then I feel a little tired without being as satisfied as I should be, similar to as if I had a wet one. I’ve got to balance it. Can’t have too much of just one thing, still want lots of sex prior to, or together with it.

Well… it’s all good. I am glad I now have one more tool in my arsenal. Just need to use it at the right time. Recently I was unlucky to have met a few women who could not take more than 10-20 minutes of sex a time. So I used some of this dry orgasm technique to finish a little earlier. Else I would have been way too frustrated, but now it still felt good! :)

Thanks, cheeva, for posting these topics here, and making us all think and share on the subject. :thumbs: