Ok, ok, so I keep hearing about being a 'better lover'

But what does that mean? A woman goes not for the size, but for the better lover. But WHAT IS a better lover? Can someone explain this one for me? I’d love to become a better lover with my average pecker.

Position, tempo, foreplay, touch, etc…

Learn them, love them.

Great concept I love it, care to expand on this. Don’t spare us the nitty gritty details, please!

Well the short of it is simple:

Position - Is she in a submissive mood? Does she want to take control? What is her favorite position, did you have to ask, or did you hear the moans?

Tempo - If you need Barry White just to keep a beat, that is a bad thing. Learn how to work her into a frenzy — start of slow, be gentle, and work her into it. If she looks sassy, skip the romance, and tame her.

Foreplay - Men are lightswitches, in such we can be turned on, and off (lol) almost instantly. Women are like a car engine: you may have started her, but she won’t be hot for a bit. Just remember not to finish before she heats up.

Touch - Kiss her, alot. Explore her neck, stomach, thighs, butt, and lower back with your tongue. Stay away from her armpits, and feet though, not only do they smell, but women are very self conscious! Remember, even though you stuffed her like a turkey, she still has feeling elsewhere. Show her you can actually do two (or three!) things at once when you have an erection.

Here’s an excellent thread by cheeva: Dick Control: A Primer

Here’s a good book:

http://www.amaz … /dp/0446677620/

ESO: How You and Your Lover Can Give Each Other Hours of Extended Sexual Orgasm
by Alan P. Brauer (Author), Donna J. Brauer (Author)

$10.20 at Amazon. This book changed my life. It will change yours.

Just bought that book, sta-kool.

You should be a salesman, I end up buying everything you recommend.

HA HA. Well, it is a very good book, so I think you won’t regret spending the $10.00 bucks. You can’t even get 2 Starbucks drinks for that. Plus hours and hours of orgasms have to be worth at least ten dollars, right?

Get your girlfriend to go through it with you. She will love it.

What the other guys have written.

Be in half way decent shape. It helps if you can move her around on a bed and support your own body weight without using hands.

Have some endurance. As far a sex in a LTR goes, (one where you are committed and have both been tested), you can switch back and forth between oral and penetration without messing with a rubber. Guess what? If you can last 10 minutes without popping your cork you are now a marathon man! Very, very few woman will object if you stop humping her every 10 minutes and go down on her for a bit.

Be empathic. This is actually top of the list so I put it last. This is something that you can improve on by working at it. Work at it.

You mean, like, bipedalism?

I second the recommendation of switching between vaginal and oral. Eagerly diving down with your mouth after fucking her brains out for a while shows a certain enthusiasm about her pussy that chicks tend to love. Same as when a girl starts sucking you dry after humping you for a while.

Good analogy, para-goomba.

Refresh9 — if you master oral, you have become a master.

In addition to switching between oral and vaginal, I recommend doing oral ONLY now and again.

You know how much you like that when she does it to you. Well, she likes it too. So Get down there, take your time, be enthusiastic, make her crazy. Keep her on the edge for a long long time, take her up to the point of no return several times. Then relentlessly take her over the edge. If she’s multiorgasmic then keep at it.

There are good techniques in that ESO book I recommended for oral and manual stimulating a women. It is called “Extended Sexual Orgasm” for a reason.

Like painting a car, it is all in the prepwork that makes the final product look good. Foreplay starts when you see her. If you can control a state of sexual tension, the sizzle sells the steak.

Out of curiosity I looked at the Amazon site for it and found it cost $80.00!!!

Nope, it is $10.19. (I guess it dropped a penny from the other day) Probably worth eighty dollars or more, but it is only ten dollars. Maybe you were finding some rare edition or something.

Here is the direct link I got from a google search:

ESO: How You and Your Lover Can Give Each Other Hours of Extended Sexual Orgasm (Paperback)
http://www.amaz … /dp/0446677620/

But beyond even technique is one thing you can work on, and one you can’t.

The thing you can work on is getting into her head and finding out what really rocks her.
The thing you can’t work on (as far as I know), is chemistry. When the chemistry between two people is strong, they turn each other on very easily. So if you are not already in a relationship, look for a woman who makes you hot when you are simply in her presence. It is not really a visual thing, it is more on the level of smell and pheromones. Chances are, if she makes you hot, it is reciprocal. Under this definition, there is no such thing as a generally hot woman. What is hot for you, will be luke warm for some other man. The same goes for how you will be perceived by women.

As far as technique goes, not all women like the same things, so you can’t learn a “killer” technique to slay them all with! Enthusiasm is a good turn on though. Get the woman to tell you what they want in bed.