Unleashing her sexual appetite

I just read an article in my local newspaper, and then searched the web for "Intrinsa" to find this:

http://www.thed octorslounge.ne … osterone_patch/
The Doctors Lounge
Testosterone patch (Intrinsa) enhances sex drive in women
Sunday, 29th February 2004

Some of our wives and girlfriends, may be menopausal, leading to several "problems", including:
low libido, lack of enjoyment, due to soreness and lack of natural lubrication. One of the interesting points of this patch is that trans-dermal testosterone seems to reduce some of the liver and other problems with oral testosterone. I have seen a similar references to trans-dermal estrogen being better "safer" than by the oral route. I asked my wife to ask her gynecologist about adding some testosterone to her trans-dermal HRT cream, any comments from our Medical members?

ANAL.

Yes, good link, sailboatracer. Here’s a more recent story:

An interesting point Sparkyx brought up about “unlocking the sexuality”

I’ve been with my wife for a total of over 13 years, and a few years back I started “exploring” into this phenomenon.. Well let me tell you I firmly believe women are just as kinky and horny as most men.

We now play games: “hard to get”, “dressup”, “role playing” etc, etc. We have starting “swinging” (soft not hard) We have experimented a little with “drugs and sex” - the list goes on and on.

Today we are very secure, trust each other completely, are very open and honest. Our sex is spectacular.
Hell, she even likes this whole PE’ing thing.

Here’s the trick: Be spontanteous, very honest, and start hinting and joking about “games” or fantasies - you will be surpised with her responses :)

Well, assuming I have to keep it clean, this will be a bit different than some of the other answers,
which I disagree with….

1) Surprise her: with flowers, cook dinner for her that’s ready before she gets home, then
lead her to the bedroom and take charge….spend lot’s of time on her, and forget about
yourself tonight. Use your imagination.

2) Compliment her body…honestly, because she’ll know when you’re lying. Doesn’t just have
to be words…touch her in those places that you like to look at, or where you think she’d
feel more beautiful is she knew those places got your attention

3) Hold her, dance with her. Women need to feel safe and “covered” by their men. The more
she can relax in your arms, the more the autonomic nervous system of her body will respond
and make her receptive. Besides, the closeness can get your motor running too and that
will turn her on when she’s relaxed.

4) Consider those freedom cushions or whatever their called, that let you try new positions

5) When you make love, make noise….don’t be bashful, let her know how she makes you feel,
and that will make her feel sexy. I don’t me words. You know what I mean.

6) Don’t assume sex is the only fun you can have with her. If she feels she’s just your ticket
to get off, she will resent you (so good point ModestoMan). I assume you know what else
she likes to do for fun. Plan a date and go do it, and you know how you can wrap up the
evening! The more fun she has out on the town or away for the weekend, the more she’s
gonna have fun giving herself to you.

I disagree with the guys that said insecurity was a good motivator. It can be a motivator, but
if you make a woman fear you, you are abusing her. If you make her afraid you’ll leave her
because she doesn’t “put out”, then you’re just an a$$h***. Only cowards manipulate women
by scaring them.

Real men charm their ladies authentically and believe me, it’s more fun fucking a woman that is
in love with you all over again than one who’s faking it because she’s scared of you.

Of course, doing PE can’t hurt. Why do you think I’m doing it. She knows I’m the biggest guy
and most satisfying guy for miles around and she’s always wanting it inside her.

Have fun with your sweetheart, and appreciate her. She’s put up with you for 6 six years! :-)

BFLR

Just to clarify, whereas I acknowledge that making one insecure can be a good motivator, I do not advocate it as a form of foreplay. Foregive me if I was unclear before. Intentionally making your lover feel insecure just to improve her performance in bed is certainly abuse.

In my situation, where I feel sexually abandoned by my wife, inflicting a little jealousy and insecurity on her feels like sweet revenge, and is very tempting. But I am just acting out of anger and frustration. I agree with BFLR that this is both unkind and a losing strategy.

Modesto,

I really sympathise with your feeling abandoned. Question - could it be possible that your wife has lost all interest in sex maybe because of hormonal imbalance? If all of the Testosterone in her body is rapidly converted to estrogen and there isn’t any T left to stoke her libido . . . well, maybe hormone tests are needed so you and she could take remedial action either with a transdermal creme or a T patch.

Not prying - just trying to help.

MrTiPS

Thanks for clarifying. When I feel sexually abandoned by my wife, I just j/o in bed with her next
to me. That always gets her attention….in a good way. Point being, I won’t deny myself what I
need, but I won’t beg for it either.

Every couple is different of course.

BFLR

LOL, I’m decently fit and decently hung.

I agree also. Not nice to do that in my opinion. Plus it could backfire badly. I would think that most women would resent being treated that way, it could only harm a relationship. I know for a fact that if I would try to make my wife jealous by telling her about some real or imagined flirtation by another woman, she would start laughing uncontrollably, then hand me a suitcase and ask for my housekey.

Funny you should mention this. My wife is scheduled to have her hormones checked next month (there’s a long wait for appointments). I’ve always suspected that she is low T. Soon I’ll know.

Even if hormones are a factor, I doubt they are the primary factor. She has a hard time feeling safe and happy, especially in intimate situations. This derives from her family of origin, which is very accomplished and dignified but anxious and not at all warm.

Great post Haha. I have to second that one.

Let your wife know it is okay to become a sexual goddess. Encourage her, nurture her, teach her and let her teach you. Mrs. Vegas loves to play ‘slut lessons.’ Heck, we both love it and it has added great spice to our sex lives.

Our philosophy is this: Your marriage should be a partnership in exploring all aspects of life together. You are in this journey together and it all ends in the same way for everyone. Don’t waste the short amount of time you have on this earth. Start today or you may wind up looking back many years from now and wishing for what you never had.

May I introduce you to an exception … the lovely Mrs. K. I’ve tried for 20 years, and have made absolutely no progress. I’ve thrown in the towel several times, only to try again and end up back where I started. I have discovered, however, that long periods of celibacy can do amazing things for one’s productivity at work, and at the gym. I’d write more about it, but I feel the urge to lift weights. Later :)

Kawaihae,

Do you still love your wife? Is she a good wife to you otherwise?

Rita

Just got back from the gym :)

Rita: yes I love my wife, we have been together for 22 yrs, married 20, have 2 kids, share an office, together most hours of most days. She is a very independant lady, I don’t think anyone would describer her as a “traditional wife” like Mrs Brady Bunch or something like that, but she is nice, everyone loves her, she has lots of friends, and she is attractive. She is very into the children, her life is dedicated to them, work comes second, and thru the years I have fallen to 3rd place. Therein lies the problem, obviously, and we have discussed it on and off for years. She has a take it or leave it attitude about this, and. I take it. The option is to leave, and I don’t want to go there. So I live with it, to be with my kids.

K.