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Lap dancer has given me some sort of awakening. Whats going on?

Originally Posted by Buckfever
I never took it as an illusion. If so why would you be working towards obtaining the ability to achieve the highest levels of intimacy, where it was not forthcoming. I took it that you had learned from your circumstances, to be prepared for the opportunity. Hopefully we learn not only from the successes but from the shortcomings of others.

The rollercoaster I refer to above has me swinging from, yes there is hope, to being shattered again this morning.

I also wanted to say that I am far from perfect and acknowledge that to her. I am, however, trying.

😞

As for trust. I went to the strip club with mates and I told her I was going and I was there. Texted her from inside saying the other weren’t telling the wifes so don’t say anything. The others didn’t tell their partners.

Months later I went by myself as a treat at the end of some time off. She phones me and I answer. She asks where I am. I tell her and she goes off. Tell the mate I was with the first time and they say don’t tell her. So I don’t. Apparently it is fine to go with your mates but not by yourself. Go figure.

As for the Goddess I showed the wife the website and pointed out no intercourse and not just a happy ending. She said nothing.

Originally Posted by Shaunbaby
As for the Goddess I showed the wife the website and pointed out no intercourse and not just a happy ending. She said nothing.


I can’t tell from this, just how much info you gave her…

Anyway, about YOU:
I was in a similar situation in the past with my 20 year marriage. Thanks to help form a member on this site many years ago, we did make huge progress. However, the relationship later ended, when she met someone else. But *menos mal, (as they say in Span) - I got to go out with 2 other women! And the sex was electric, though different in both cases. I’m older now and I can see that some of the issues with my wife were self created, and some were due to sheer incompatibility, and other reasons nothing to do with me. We are good friends now and really look out for each other. We have 3 great grown up kids.

Oh sorry, I said this would be about YOU, ahem… :D

I think you could have a much more fulfilling relationship with your wife. However, if you make it all about fixing her - it will mostly get worse! If you really want to know my thoughts, I will tell you, but I don’t want to waste my time and yours. Most of my advice would involve changing the one person you have total control over - yourself.

From your story about how your massage of her led to great sex quite easily, it’s obvious your wife is quite responsive. Or put from another perspective, you have not quite blown it yet. The fact that there is not much touching in her family speaks volumes, so I’m not saying it’s all down to you. It would be interesting to know your ages.

*Menos mal means literally “less bad” but is normally used after mentioning a bad situation, to mean: But looking on the bright side… and then a description of the bright side follows :)


I'm fed up of having a signature!

Originally Posted by Shaunbaby
Well I had my first session with the Goddess.

Wow.

It didn’t happen as was outlined above.

First when I arrived she sits me down and asks why I am here. I tell her it is the awakening I had with the lap dancer and a desire to increase intimacy in my relationship. That is all fine and then she asks if I know what is going to happen. She explains that I will be nude and was that OK. Of course, I say. She then kind of asks it I am OK with her touching me. I am totally comfortable with this. She then goes to the bathroom and tells me to undress an hop onto the bed, which is a massage table. She knocks and comes back in. So in under 10 min of meeting the Goddess I am naked straddling a massage table as instructed. Well that is a first for me.

She checks my PC strength and says I have some work to do. She then checks again and asks me to flex as hard as I can for as long as I can. I go about 10 seconds to which she replies, that is not bad. But I still have work to do.

She then goes through the chakras which I mostly know, forgot Solaplexes, and said I am making her job easy. When then did a small meditation designed to get us into the present moment and leave other things outside. She explains that we are gong to do 5 min of eye gazing and that blinking is fine. She instructs me to look into her left eye and she will look into my left. She explains that her face will change in appearance to me and that I may see her aura. We hold hands and begin. (She puts on a 5 min long song) It was a really nice experience and the 5 min goes quite quickly. Her face did change and I saw a dark colour that I thought was black. I wondered at this point if she was evil and that was why I was seeing black but went with it. She asked if I saw an aura and I said yes. She said was it purple? I said yes, it was a dark purple (and not black as I had thought).

Now we go into Yab Yum, which she puts her legs over mine and we move into an embrace. She places a towel over my penis so we do not contact each other. She explains that the aim is to connect my second Sexual Chakra to my Heart Chakra using breathing. She is only wearing knickers and no bra. We embrace and I follow her breathing. Breathing in I am suppose to visualise the energy from my second chakra travel up my spine into my heart chakra. To aid this she runs her had up my back as we breath in. On the out breath I was supposed to release. I did not realise at the time that the release was supposed to spread the energy, I read this in the book after the session. We do that for a few minutes.

Now to the Tantric massage. She says you penis will do what it does and there is no wrong or right response. I actually was surprised that I was still flacid. She said you can also flex the PC muscle on the in breath and relax it on the out, but just the breathing is enough for now. I tell her that I am confident I can do the PC flex and will go back to breathing only if it gets to hard. (never been so grateful for flexing the PC muscle and blood into my clamped penis) She said that heaps of men blow and if that happen it is fine. She instruct me that if I get to an 8 out of 10 to simply say 8. I lie face down on the table and she begins to massage me with oil. It is really nice and the but cheeks get some attention. During this I follow her breathing which is sucking in like as if you were using a straw and breathing out with an Ahhhh. During this time you visualise the energy coming up into your heart and releasing on the out breath. Then she asked me to turn over. The body still get a massage but so does the penis.

She is stroking my penis and it gets hard. We are still doing the breathing and PC. After a while she says I want to to breath in and hold it and hold the PC muscle. And that is what turns out to be my first edge but I did not get to the edge. More body massage and then back to the penis and repeat as above and I still did not get to the edge. The third time I was thinking , shit I am gong to blow and was just about to say 8 when she says to breath in and hold like before. She has dialled me in and can tell when I am approached the edge. (I want to ask her how she knows I am approaching the edge.) We do another edge as I spread the energy and the pleasure is rising. At this point I am having spasms in my abs and in general jerking, which she said may happen. We get to the 5th edge and she is really stroking fast. The pleasure is amazing. Again just as I am about to say 8 she says breath in and hold it for as long as you can. Bliss and the session has finished.

Now in any other situation with the speed of her strokes there is absolutely no way I would not have blown, bit I didn’t. Truly amazing.

She leave and tells me to relax then get dressed. I get off the table and I am shaking a little and have to sit back down. I get dressed and she returns. I try to pay her and my brain is just mush. We sort it out, she gives me a cuddle and a kiss and I thank her and leave.

WOW! That was a nice read. The purple aura thing gave me chills, i want to try this when i am high. Seriously.

When you hold it as long as you can she keeps stroking? I am asking this because its easier to decrease the urge to cum when you kegel hard but only when there is no stimulation. If the stimulation is intense and i kegel hard that makes me approach the point of no return faster.
Visualization maybe is the answer.

No stroking on the holds. Sorry for the short answer. Just about to get on the bus.

The tanteic practices is something i am very interested in but as someone who is married and has an absolute no tolerance on contact with another woman philosphy, how would you recommend practicing this solo?

I can edge for 20 to 30 minutes easy but i can’t seem to achieve non-ejaculatory orgasms.


Starting: 9/1/18 NBPEL 5.0 BPEL 6.5 EG 5.0 Current: 3/8/19 NBPEL 6.25 BPEL 7.25 EG 5.5

Goal: NBPEL 8.0 BPEL 8.5 EG 6.5

My progress pictures thread.

Same breathing and flexing the PC muscle as I described I suppose. It just that you would be providing the stimulation. I’m too early into this to be able to comment further.

I’m probably way out of line here so take this with a grain of salt. And I’m not going to be all that crudely direct, because I feel for you. If you want to continue to gain more skills that’s fine, but I think you got plenty.

I think you should focus on ravaging your wife. Gently insist on it, till you get there, don’t capitulate, seduce her. I think she’ll give you everything you want. But YOU are going to have to make it happen.

Just my opinion.


Big cock, tight abs, fit body, strong mind.

Originally Posted by Buckfever
I think you should focus on ravaging your wife.

The doctor has just provided you the prescription.

Now take it:-)

Btw, there will be bumps along the road, such is life.


Once upon a time (2015): 6.40” x 4.50”

Today: 7.25” x 5.00”, Thunder Cocks Unite!

I think we can...Little Engine’s Climb

Originally Posted by Ph33rme
The tanteic practices is something i am very interested in but as someone who is married and has an absolute no tolerance on contact with another woman philosphy, how would you recommend practicing this solo?

Why do you need to practice solo, is this not inefficient?

Practice with wife and we develop together, right?


Once upon a time (2015): 6.40” x 4.50”

Today: 7.25” x 5.00”, Thunder Cocks Unite!

I think we can...Little Engine’s Climb

Originally Posted by Buckfever
I’m probably way out of line here so take this with a grain of salt. And I’m not going to be all that crudely direct, because I feel for you. If you want to continue to gain more skills that’s fine, but I think you got plenty.

I think you should focus on ravaging your wife. Gently insist on it, till you get there, don’t capitulate, seduce her. I think she’ll give you everything you want. But YOU are going to have to make it happen.

Just my opinion.

Nice idea! Have thought about it and tried it. No good. I appreciate your intentions though.

With a couple of issues:

1. It’s what a man wants to do.
2. Tried it.
3. She is so repressed she won’t touch herself, not even for cleaning, there has to be cloth between her fingers and genitals.
4. It requires her to let go, refer to three.
5. Tantra teaches that a way to a man’s heart is through his cock. The way to a woman’s pussy is through her heart. See one above.

That is why I wanted to start with eye gazing. All I wanted was 5 mins. The Goddess sugested to start slow. Nothing has worked to date so i am trying a new approach. And now she is off out again tonight. Hurt again.

Thanks for the support, I know your intentions were pure.

Can I make her cum, yes. Can I make a dancer in a club cum, yes. Am I big enough not to have issues, yes. Do I want to explore what more is out there, YES! I want to explore what I am capable off, ideally with her. I have so much sexual energy and pleasure that I wan to give and to be able to receive similar.

I am realising that repression is such a powerful issue in my society.

SB

Im also readung a book called The Ethical Slut. Polyamory. There is a great show on YouTube if your interested. And yes she knows, the book is in plain view and I have discussed it with her.

Originally Posted by Don Logan

I hate to hear that. That’s rough. What do others think: Is this a pattern among women, where they are close and intimate at first, but then grow physically more distant? I think that women do that more than men.

Yes! Yes! I have my thoughts on this. It’s about power. I’ll write more.

Originally Posted by Shaunbaby
Let’s take last week.

Do you want to come back to bed for a cuddle? Out of her mouth, I don’t want sex. To which I reply, we won’t have sex until you ask for it. We go back to bed and I give her my version of a tantric massage. So mostly a body massage with occasionally moving across erogenous zones. Then as I am massaging she spreads her legs and ask if I want sex. I say, you have to ask for it. She does.

She can cum through penetration but it’s not as intense. So I offer to go down on her. She is pretty hot and warmed up and in a few mins I have her orgasming with her shuddering as the contractions hit.

Anyone wonder why I fell like I am on a rollercoaster?

SB


This is going to be hard to do, but you have to reclaim your power, your mystique. All guys should stop asking for sex and pretend you don’t give a shit. She’ll start to wonder why you don’t care anymore. Guys who get girls clamoring after them are not asking for sex, yet it’s offered. Guys who ask, expect, sulk, whine, text and beg never get it. Become mysterious again. I’m not saying this is your issue, you sound very well self-aware, i’m writing this to the general public. Guys who are asking their wives for sex are going down the wrong path where they continue to lose respect and eventually she will fuck someone else. And yes, it’s a bad pattern when you first meet a girl and suddenly sparks are flying sex is happening constantly and then they stop. This is true of the stripper, the massage therapist, the girl at the shop etc etc. After they hook you in, they have measured you, now you’re stuck and become a fraction of the man you used to be. Next time you’re in the situation where she asks you if you want sex, say “nah, maybe next time, I have to do ‘xyz’ (insert your own alpha excuse). Act like you don’t care.
We are not meant to be beggars but fucking kings. Take it back and be a king.


Last edited by Nudgetracker : 02-11-2019 at .
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