Well, I am pretty new in this forum, I ‘ve been doing lot of reading and today I read all of this post.
Here is my story.
I am pretty young, and recently I had my first long relationship (it lasted for almost half a year), in which all I did with my girlfriend was sex and only when we couldn’t go more we did something else. Pretty weird relationship that was.
The funny thing is, since I had really little experience in sex before her and that was not any good, I was too worried about how good I would perform for her. What I manage to do , was for almost a month, I lasted from 2 to 5 thrusts. This was really awful.
First time we had sex, I lasted for 3 thrusts (count seconds :P) and I thought to myself “crap, well, anyway I ll get a second chance and not having sex for months is a good excuse for her”. I did, but second time was exactly the same. She said it wasn’t so important , we could work this out together. I got anxious and avoided to see her for 3 days during which I asked everyone I was close with, how to deal with this, I kept reading on the net about my problem. After 3 days of studying I had pretty much every known way to try to hold myself. Be that masturbating before the session, relaxing, thinking other stuff during sex, trying to use BC. I tried everything on her but nothing kept me going for more than 10 thrusts (count the seconds again :P). I was like just spraying on her.
I got really disappointed, since it was going on for about 3 Weeks, so I tried some of this condoms that are supposed to desensitize you, which helped the first time I used it ( I kept going for almost 5 minutes) and the next time (10 minutes after the first session stopped) it did nothing, I sprayed again !
Meanwhile, I used to give her hand-jobs, oral and every kind of foreplay there is, I found out how to make her come and she liked it, but I didn’t feel alright.
Anyway, needless to say I got really disappointed. In fact, even though I am at my twenties and have perfect health, there was a time I couldn’t even get it up from anxiety.
It was almost a month, I was dead tired and hadn’t slept good, when she came over my place and at the time I was wearing the condom I thought “What I have in mind , won’t take more than two minutes” (A line Chandler uses in “The friends” series to define his skills ), I thought what was about to happen as a joke. To my surprise, I didn’t spray her, I went more than 10 thrusts and thought to myself “wtf is that?”, I kept going and going, increasing speed , altering positions and at sometime she got really aroused and started acting in a way that made me lose control. Outcome was I lasted about 35 minutes. That was something new to me and I was really happy about that.
After that, I stopped thinking about my duration and every time (almost daily) we got together I lasted from 15 to whatever minutes. We even went for it 6 times in the same day sometimes. It was really great.
Bottom line is I think it is really about what you think about it. Being worried about being good gets you done in seconds. I have examples of my friends (similar to something someone posted before) that think really low of girls that they have sex with them and they can’t even come, I mean they go for whatever time and eventually just stop, or masturbate to come.
Also, about energy drinks, breathing is important, you have to be relaxed so you don’t climax too fast (IMO), and energy drinks cause your heartbeat to increase. I used to drink vodka + red bull to get both effects awareness and relaxation :P. The only thing I got was hands shaking from this dreadful combination.
Well, stop worrying and have a sense of humor:-)
Sorry if that was too long.
