Quitting Porn

I used to think back in the day that porn has some “social benefits”, but nowadays I just think is plain bad. The world was better without porn I believe. Or at least, very hard to get. I grew up in a world without internet, cellphones, social media, nothing. At most me and my friends were able to come across a magazine that somebody stole from his dad, and a full high quality vhs in those days was a dream that I only accomplished a couple of times lol.

But I strongly believe that our sexual health would be much better without porn today. Certainly porn causes a great degree of desensitization. Our brains kinda get used to see pussy, ass, tits, of all and, sizes, shapes, colors, etc. We can easily find online he girl of our dreams completely spread eagle shoving dildos up. If we did not have access to that, all of it would be in our imagination only and when the time comes to interact with a real human, our erection level would be 200% with the libido and desire of a stallion.

I totally agree with this. Unfortunately, some of the reason behind why the camera and film was invented in the first place was because they wanted to capture nudity and depictions of sex on film. Sad, but that’s partially why we now have TV, photos and movies/film. I think a lot of this desensitizes men and makes their genitals act accordingly, which is to act less than ever before. When I was growing up I had a magazine that showed bikini models, that was my first glimpse at “pornography” although there was no nudity, it was a mild start. No porn in high school it just wasn’t available and then I got a VHS tape with 4 scenes on it, one was with Peter North, and I remember seeing it and saying “wow I didn’t know cum could shoot out like that, how does that happen?!” And my eroticism of pornography began although it was always light use and seldom, not but maybe once a week of looking at stuff even after high speed internet was available. However, my wife’s menopause paired with Covid last year brought me to my heaviest porn use in my life, while in my mid-40s, which I consider later in life than most men suffering from this addiction and affliction, but it was enough to destroy my hard on when it was time to finally start having comfortable and regular sex with my wife again. Literally a week after quitting porn I was hard for her again and after 6 months my erections are felt so deeply inside of me that I wonder if I’ve even been this hard over the last 20 years of my life!!! I will agree that my wife and I both learned how to do things to each other because we watched porn together, like new positions or blowjob techniques, etc., but the social aspect of it is beyond denigrating anymore and its entirely gross to watch. Last night my wife and I had sex after a 4-day break and when I pulled out to cum it was such a massive volley of jizz that it not only destroyed a section of her hair but it hit the pillow under her head with a loud “thump” sound we both heard. I’ve been having immense, extremely strong orgasms and ejaculations the last few months and its a feeling I haven’t felt before and I’m sure my Os and ejaculations are intensifying now I’m off porn completely.

I agree the world would better without porn. I think I’ve been watching porn since I was 15. I’ve tried to quit several times, always gave back in at some point. I think I’m definitely suffering from a case of porn infused erectile dysfunction. I will get morning wood and have wood throughout the night, but as soon as I wake wake up it runs and hides, I want to get back to the days of my teens and early 20s where I’d wake up and have to figure out how to angle myself so my piss would make it into the bowl.

I was able to stay off of porn for about 15 days and just an overall sense of well-being, better erections, higher self worth. Quitting porn is part of my goal to achieve better erections. Hopefully support from this thread can help.

Porn is just like a drug. As you watch, your brain gets used to that level of nudity, sex, images, etc. So the sexual desire and erection quality adjust to that level. In response, you require more hardcore porn or more variety in order to achieve the same desire and erection as before. And so on, that is why we have a massive arrange of multiple types of porn.

And even if we dont watch porn, we are invaded every day everywhere with women showing their ass on g-strings, things that we did not have fully access decades ago. I still remember when I was a kid, the cover of a magazine showing a “baywatch” babe on those classic red swimsuits was enough for me to jerkoff a whole afternoon. When I saw my first porn movie on a vhs, I went to school after that afternoon and evening and I remember keeping an erection that wouldn’t go down for as long as those images were still in my mind.

Just imagine for a minute how our desire, libido and erection quality would be, for ALL of us, if we did not have any kind of temptation out there. No pictures of booty, no girls in tiny bikinis, no porn at all, no nudity at all, etc. Only full nudity and sex when you interact with a woman. All of us with no exception would perform as pornstars.

I tend to find another correlation between porn and sex life. During my heaviest porn period, which almost fell like an addiction, when we had sex with my wife, I was cumming on the second minute mark, or no more than five minutes. After revisiting my interests I found that the videos I watched the most for a first ejaculation were around 6 minutes long. Coincidence?

I doubt.

Fighting with premature ejaculation, which also doubled as an orgasm, I ditched porn completely. However, me and my wife would no longer have sex, since she is in the “soul is better than sex” mood, and I have no time to break barriers, induced by her father’s discipline over the course of 19 years. Yet, with my full understanding that quitting both porn AND sex would lead to a dramatic turn of events, I entered the world of PE. Just for me. Nobody to impress.

So porn is bad. Period.

Igigi and flowsky,

100% agree. What you both said has definitely sunk in, struck a chord in me, and brought my motivation level to quit way up. Thanks.

Consider Thunder’s as a long schlong support group, where dick size obsession is centered around one’s well being, rather than results.
If you happen to feel the urge to wank one off to porn, just remember that a 30-year-old Bulgarian fella has quit sex with his wife in order to make her more comfortable about herself.

This is the true goal of PE.

That’s precisely what makes this group great!

*My wife gave me an amazing BJ last night and tonight is HER turn to be the center of attention.

Previously, when I used porn daily, the thought of having to “perform” for her 24 hours later was stressful. At times, I would experience a mild form of ED on “day 2” if we were intimate on consecutive days. Sure, I could get it up, but I couldn’t KEEP it up for the 20-40 minutes she needed to have her fill of climaxes, or if I could, the EQ was poor and I frequently “slipped out”. This was not especially helpful for her pleasure!

Now, after only 3 porn free weeks (cold turkey too), I’m having ejaculations that are painfully powerful, but also having zero difficulty maintaining an awesome erection for as much as an hour; even when several consecutive days of intimacy occur.

She even comments that it’s harder than normal and frequently asks me to “go easy”, as the full erection is long enough to tag the cervix in certain positions. I’m sure it’s always been that length, but my EQ was poor enough that it felt shorter!

I still masturbate, but it’s far less frequent, I now enjoy saving the load for her; she has noticed the increased volume from my climax and now has her best orgasms right after I come. Since that is a turn on for me, I use it to help me stay focused on my goal, which is to remain porn free and help increase HER pleasure and mine alike.

A crucial step for me was to admit to her that I have used porn for arousal. Admittedly I did not tell her that I basically looked at porn for an hour a day while edging; for two decades or more, but I did explain that I had fallen into a trap where I used porn for arousal prior to intimacy. I also explained to her how “visual” I am as a man, and that I craved visual stimulation in addition to the physical; this was lacking in our relationship. I described how I was ashamed to share this need for visual stimulus and how I and took the lazy way out thru porn use.

We’ve been married almost 25 years, and she has packed on 20# and stopped wearing lingerie; at the same time, she also quit giving me BJ’s over a decade ago; sex got boring. This, in my mind, gave ma an excuse to find visual stimulation, novelty and excitement thru porn.

By having the courage to tell her about my struggle, and have an open conversation about expectations within our relationship, we have both learned a lot; she is now watching her caloric intake, and exercising again. Lingerie will return soon ;) She also shared the reason for her moritorium on fellatio; apparently, many years ago, I came in her mouth real hard and choked her a bit. Since she doesn’t choose to allow this, she simply quit providing oral stimulation. Now, we have established “signals” and a clear way to prevent this in the future and she’s willing to start over and try again; I’m obviously thrilled. Full oral climaxes are currently “off the table”, but we’re making progress, as she’s provided a half dozen BJ’s in the past three weeks.

She even allowed me to film us having intercourse recently and then watched it with me a week later; since she’s never seen anything like this, it was intriguing and she said I could record it any time! I’m looking forward to our first BJ video this weekend, and since I now know that she feels more accomplished when my ejaculation is larger, you bet your ass I’ll be staying away from porn, exercising and drinking my 3+ litres of water every day!!!

For me personally, I have replaced the time spent edging to porn with my PE routine. When I’m tempted to use porn, I remind myself how amazing my orgasms are without porn use and then fantasize about the things we do together. I also remind myself that it is selfish to deprive my wife of the pleasure and satisfaction of receiving everything I can give. She recently shared how the volume of my ejaculation is affirmation of her “skills”. I don’t want to interfere with THAT “feedback loop”!

Best of luck in your journey! Look into the “principle of replacement” and see if you can’t utilize it for your success!

-Horseman-

This is nice to hear and thanks for sharing all of this! Several things you say ring true for me, too. I quit porn cold turkey and I think its the only way to do it. I remind myself how much better I am without it and its showing in the bedroom. My wife has always loved my hard on, but lately she’s been commenting on just how much harder I feel to her now than while I was on the porn needle. My EQ stays the same while she’s on top and I get very hard fast on my back and stay very hard in that position now, whereas for years I couldn’t really get hard laying on my back and couldn’t stay 100% hard enough for her to ride me the way she wants and needs to. This alone, getting and staying hard laying on my back, is how I know quitting porn works for EQ improvement.

I’m so glad you get blowjobs again!! Same here though, I shoot extremely hard and choke my wife almost every time I finish in her mouth. In the past it was okay, it turned her on knowing how hard she made me cum and that it was so intense it chokes her. But after a few rounds of oral surgery she can’t handle it often anymore so finishing in her mouth happens just a few times a year. I love those times! Having a signal for warning is great, it can save her for sure!

I used to masturbate and just get online and say “who’s online now?” or “what’s online today?” and mindlessly fap. Now I say “what’s going on inside of me right now?” and turn the attention inward and focus on my pleasure that I’m giving myself, not something that is funneling through me from an external source. When I was not staying hard during masturbation with porn on, or was unable to get hard to get off without porn on, that was when I knew it, that I had a problem with porn. I haven’t jerked off and cum to porn since that day I realized that.

Enjoy this new sexual awakening with your wife and live a wonderful life together! Sex truly gets better, not worse, as we age. I think you are seeing (and feeling!) this now first hand and I’m sure you two will be having so much fun together now that you are becoming super charged!

Hearing about all the positive results you guys are experiencing from eliminating porn is really encouraging and inspiring. Day 4 here. I’m single flowsky, so I’m sort of in the same boat with no sex, but I would imagine it’s more difficult when you have a source of sex that is on lock down, sounds frustrating, but hang in there.

One of the worst aspects of quitting porn is that it’s so damn electrifying to look at after you’ve fallen off of the wagon.

That feeling of looking at porn with fresh eyes… That makes it even harder.

It’s closed case for now, I just don’t have the time nor the nerve to fight against someone who just doesn’t understand the essence of pleasure. Done for good with all of this crap. More time for PE, I guess.

This is so true; over the years, I had “quit” multiple times, but in my heart, I knew I’d go back. When I started using it again, it was like being introduced to an old friend. The edging was exhilarating and the orgasms seemed impossible to eclipse.

This time, however; I have discovered that it was smoke and mirrors; the real thing is so much more satisfying. Sure, I had great orgasms jackin’ to porn, but ten or fifteen minutes later, I needed/wanted to do it again.

Now that I’m fantasizing about HER, and not saturating my mind with images and camera angles typically unseen in the bedroom, my climaxes absolutely rival anything from solo time with porn.

In addition, when the lady and I are done, there’s a “afterglow” that is often more fulfilling than “round 2” ever was with porn. Not surprisingly, that afterglow and cuddling frequently leads to more touching and you know where that goes.

You can do it!

I have also begin appreciating the “mystery” of her arousal. With porn, she had to be ready all the time; porn paints a picture of women wanting cock all the time and not requiring and connection or build up.

Now that I’m not using it, I am having to re-learn how to turn her on, and learn to accept that she may not be ready every time I’m ready. That doesn’t mean she won’t give a “handsy” or something else in between, but it does mean that I need to reprogram my expectations so that they match the reality of her female arousal.

Keep at it and take the journey toward real fulfilling sexual intimacy.

-Horseman-

Can’t find any problems with porn but it instead helps to keep harder, longer erection for clamping works

It’ll get even worse. 3D porn is already out there. It will become more popular an massive to have goggles and watch in 3d as you jerk off as being inside the scene, or on demand. Eventually, porn will completely erase our abilities psychologically and physically to interact with a real woman. And that is part of the global population control agenda.’

Eventually at some point, some politicians will raise the flag, talks will begin, and the solution will be to make dolls more easily accessible for men. Procreation, specially among those educated will go down to almost zero. While the uneducated without access to porn or dolls will still reproduce like rabbits, subsidized by the government.