Turn my small penis into a big one, then for the first time, get a girlfriend?

Hi there, I am nearly 30 and have never had a girlfriend. I have had flings, one night stands and seen prostitutes but for the most part I tend to avoid sex because I am a little insecure about my dick size and don’t want sex to feel disappointing. I have been through periods of depression which definitely had negative impacts on my size and erection quality. But I am ready to make some changes now and am looking forward to seeing the results of jelqing

I have known about jelqing since I was a young teen but never committed to it or took it seriously until now. My penis size has always been between 5 and 5.5 inches NBEL and recent girth was 4.2 inches. My length isn’t what bothers me, it’s the girth. Sometimes sex for me feels abit like throwing a hot dog down a hallway.. I have only ever made 1 girl come, this was many years ago and I think my dick was abit thicker back then.

I spent alot of the past month+ reading up on penis enlargement. I came across many health warnings, risks and advice saying that I should be happy with what I have got. But I also came across many reviews from guys (like here on thunders place) who report that jelqing really changed their sex life, improved their relationships, increased their self confidence and generally made their lives better. So far, I am very impressed with the penis enlargement community. In today’s world you hear alot of complaints about toxic masculinity, macho men or how bad the patriarchy is etc. But, to me, the penis enlargement community comes across as a supportive place for men, committed to self improvement, a place where guys will help other men on a pseudonymous platform with no expectation of anything in return. I think this is amazing and is why I have decided to create a profile and join the thunders place forum.

I am quite new to jelqing as I have done it many times in the past but never committed to a program.
I decided as of 1st October 2021 that I would commit to jelqing until I reach my intermediate goal of 6 inches NBPEL + the appropriate associated increase in girth. Once I have reached this goal I will resume working on having relationships with women, and hopefully find a person to have good sexual relations with for the first time. If this works, I will see how I go for a while before potentially going for my ultimate goal of 7 inches NBEL with whatever girth I can manage to get with this (hopefully 5-6 inches).

Current results (after 5 weeks total but the first 3 weeks were bad technique) - 5.3 inch NBEL x 4.3 inch girth (from starting size 5.1 inch NBPEL x 4.2 inch girth)

I know that this size difference could mostly be dismissed as measurement error but I am very careful with my measurement technique and I am feeling stronger erections already

1st OCT STARTING SIZE - 5.1 inch NBPEL x 4.2 inch girth
CURRENT SIZE - 5.3 inch NBPEL x 4.3 inch girth
INTERMEDIATE GOAL - 6 inch NBPEL x >4.5 inch girth?
ULTIMATE GOAL - 7 inch NBPEL x 5-6 inches or so girth

I started with a mix of wet regular jelqs and v jelqs for 3 weeks, about 30mins a day 5 days a week, but my technique was really bad and I made some changes after achieving minimal results. 2 weeks ago I started making sure I was warming up properly with a wet cloth beforehand, and I changed my routine to being 30-60min sessions, twice a day mix of regular wet jelqs and v jelqs. I am careful about the amount of pressure I use as I do not want to end up with a venous leak injury. I was going to consider taking pictures but I am normally a kind of private person and I’m not sure how I feel about this now. At the moment my routine only contains wet jelqs and v jelqs. I am averse to buying equipment but I have read that clamps? May be good for girth and I would love to get some advice on that here. Thank you!

Hey Welcome to the community!
I suggest to measure with the BPEL (Bone Pressed). It’s better to track gains with more precision.
Good luck in your training but don’t wait until you reach a goal to meet someone!

All the best

Hey there thanks for the welcome!

Yes I have noticed that people tend to use bone pressed more often here - I will try to get into the habit later

Actually I met a beautiful girl a week ago who was practically begging me to have sex but I didn’t want to. I have been covertly blown off by girls because of my penis size before. Maybe this girl will wait a few months for me to grow, who knows? But I am not really eager to jump into a sexual relationship when I know my dick isn’t going to be doing much for either of us except disappoint

From your non bone pressed measurements above. You are not small, just average. There is nothing to be gained by avoiding sex with an average sized unit.

Hi jamando,

You’re focusing on NBPEL for length. Understandable but use BPEL for tracking gains. You want a consistent measurement that isn’t effected by the size of your fat pad or cheatable by pushing in a little further. By the way when you fuck hard, you’re giving them BPEL. There’s a thread on How to Measure Your Penis.

Also consider starting with the Newbie Routine rather than an ad-hoc routine. It’s well balanced and will act as either a good medium term routine or springboard for other routines.

Jelqing takes time to perfect. There’s a thread on How to Jelq and if your search for jelq you’ll see a couple of videos and a bunch of other threads. Allow yourself to be crap at jelqing and persist. When we begin anything we suck at it, even if we don’t realize.

You’re right about my length being average. But it’s my below average girth that makes my penis small (started at just below 4.2 inches). We all know by now the importance of girth for female pleasure. It also affects my sensations; like I said, sometimes it feels like throwing a hotdog down a hallway. Neither the girl nor I can get to climax because neither of us feels anything. Would like some more girth here. Super intent on it

Look into a cock ring for a quick girth increase.

My tongue and fingers are responsible for many more orgasms than my dick. They never tire and don’t have a refractory period to contend with. Spend a lot of time on foreplay and make sure she has at least one orgasm (more if she is multi orgasmic) from it and the dick play is just icing on the cake. Any guy that eats pussy because they enjoy it and not because it is a requirement to get out of the way so they can get to the dick work will find women very willing for a return engagement.

You should join the pumping club :D .

Very good general girth gains and if you need extra security before sex you pump and again another 0.3” in girth also improving erections and flaccid state.

This is really good advice. Giving her that first orgasm by whatever works easiest will relax her and make it easier for her to go more. And on your side you can take the pressure off of yourself to do everything right and/or last long enough. Sex is so much better when you aren’t worrying about things.

I agree with 5.5. Don’t pass an opportunity if she’s someone you like. If you wait until you are satisfied with your dick to date, you might be waiting forever.

Look at it this way. If a girl ghosts you because you have a normal dick she was an asshole to begin with. Not worth your consideration.

Did you bring up your insecurities to them beforehand? Because that’s not always the best idea.

I’ve been doing girth exercises for 3 months and gained 0.25 inch, which would bring you to 4.45 - 4.5 inch. What I would advice is for you to get a measuring tape and clamp your dick and measure it again. Then heat your dick and measure it again and just play with what works for you for 3 - 6 sessions.

A session is around 20 - 30 minutes.
And try to do around 3 - 4 sessions a week.
Make sure you use heat as that helps a lot.

Also make sure you get a clamped girth at least 0.5cm bigger than normal.

I really advice measuring a lot so you feel familiar with the feeling of adding girth and pressure.

DO NOT leave in a clamp for hours and just hope for the best.

Buy a measuring tape and use it often for the first couple of weeks. I would say.

Dude, have sex with her now while you can!! All this “my cock is disappointing” is just because its disappointing to YOU, whereas you don’t know if she would care. A woman that TRULY wants YOU is not just wanting your cock. They want YOU, not just a body part. I know I make it sound easy, but that’s just the truth. That’s what real relationships and two people sharing love and sex with each other really only care about.

Same I totally agree take this advice!!
I know a guy online who is like 39 now and has never even kissed a girl or been on a date because he grew up with porn and believes in his heart of hearts that he cannot please a woman with his cock and he’s spent years doing PE and can’t even measure himself to know if he’s grown, and is still on a “quest” to grow his cock to “defy expectations” and not be rejected.

He’s almost 40 and never been with a woman in any capacity. Just because he thinks his dick is too small before anyone has ever seen it.
If a woman thinks you aren’t worth it because of your penis size, FUCK HER. Let her try to be a size queen with all her other girlfriends that aren’t finding love, relationships and meaning in life.

Have fun and have sex with the girl that makes you happy, and if you make her happy, you will both have a wonderful time and it will be great!

Alot of great replies on here (thanks so much), some of them talking about bringing girls to orgasm with my tongue/fingers

I have only ever made 1 girl come with my dick in the past. I like eating pussy but I have never made a girl come with my tongue or fingers. I know this isnt a sex ed site but I would presume that getting into a relationship with her and getting to know her likes and dislikes will help me eventually gain the skills to satisfy her with my tongue/fingers?

Yes I did tell her that I have recently been through a depression and have lost alot of libido as a result (which was also true). I don’t think she fully understand why I was so squirmish about having sex but she acted pretty cool with it and was ?understanding..

Guys I feel like I need to clarify I’m not a complete and total mess of insecurity. There may be other reasons for my not having a girlfriend aswell (like going through several periods of depression etc). I have taken girls home from pubs or tinder and had very underwhelming sex, I have met girls I really liked and then pulled my uber thin - depression affected - limp dick out and was not able to do ANYTHING. After a week of trying! (this is a diifferent girl from the past - ) I did eat her pussy but maybe I wasn’t good enough at it I don’t know. After I botched this, she kind of blew me off one time when I was later trying to get back in touch with her. And yes, I believe it was at least in part, because of the performance of my dick.

If I felt like just “getting it in” would satisfy me, then maybe I would do that. But that doesnt satisfy me. I want good sex. I want to experience what it’s like to have great sex, and to know she is experiencing the same. I’m an all or nothing guy. That is why I would prefer to wait at least for now.. If I could become ‘great’ at sex then I think that would greatly affect the scope of my future relationships. And I don’t have to be that great. I just need to know we are both feeling something. Because hotdog down a hallway feels like going through the motions and spending the entire time in my head thinking ‘this is shit I wish my dick was bigger’

To the guys suggesting cock rings and penis clamps - I did buy a cock ring once for ED but I don’t know how to use either of those devices for the purpose of penis enlargement
When I put the cock ring on and measured, I found that my girth was temporarily increased by 0.2 inches but only because it was making my veins protrude. I think I would prefer not to buy a pump at this stage mostly because I wouldn’t want the people I live with to find it.

Pumpedmember that’s a really interesting story about your friend I love it. It makes me wonder about all the people PE didnt work for. Would you guys say that this site is abit biased because alot of the people who experienced gains may be more inclined to share their story? Is there any advice anyone would give to your friend? If I were to give him advice it would be very general about improving his life, and becoming more strategic and assertive at getting what he wants in life, and forming the relationships that he would like. I’m sure I could have a great relationship if I find a girl who is happy with my penis size. But I don’t want that right now. I want great sex first. And I’m sure relationships will come after

I am actually starting to get worried now - what if PE doesnt work for me?

A couple things that reassure me are - every time I go through a depression (I’m talking like.. 4 months of practically NO erections not even morning wood / nothing) my dick does get smaller. So therefore it must be possible to make it bigger. And Secondly, I am very confident that I have already made some gains this past month. Really, I think it probably comes down to getting your technique down right and being consistent.

And yes just to quickly address the depression thing - I went through bad times a few months back and in the past month I have pretty much totally recovered (no meds because fuck the side effects of those). I have started working out again alot this past month. I know I’m not supposed to talk about chemical enlargement but I’ll just say that I am taking small amounts of supplements designed for gym go-ers that I believe might be beneficial for blood flow to extremities. I am already feeling my erection quality significantly improve (morning wood is back and is great!) and I believe it is mostly due to the jelqing (but also helped by exercise improved mindset etc).

I think that it is okay for me to be optimistic ?

I was suggesting wearing a cock ring for sex to take advantage of the bump in girth.