Is It In Yet????

There is a lot of pain in this thread, women can be pretty insensitive sometimes without their knowledge of how it would crush a guy, and also they say all the wrong things after.

My story. Had to be my senior year in high school. Was dating this girl for about 8 months or so. I never was really to much into penis size, I didn’t care, but I really loved this girl, thought I was going to be with her forever. So anyways, she used to stroke my ego and say I was big, and at that time I could honestly say I was at least longer than I am now, I just felt the girth wasn’t there. So she kept on with it during sex, like I was this sex god or something lol, I did like that, she told me I was the biggest she had, which I believed, it was high school, how many guys could she have been with. So then it was at one of the post graduation parties we went to, I heard her with her friends talking, they were drunk, but size came up, and she did say she thought I was great in the sack, but then said her last boyfriend was long and would hurt her every time they had sex, she was talking shit about him, but it bothered me. The fact that she told me one thing, then I over hear her say that, so after that I brought it up and she kept saying I was bigger, (I couldn’t believe I was in a big dick conversation with an average dick = embarrassing) like she was trying to comfort me, but that’s the last thing I wanted was pity. It ruined our relationship, it just bothered me so much, she kept saying that I was bigger as in longer, and each time she said it, it was like kicking me in the balls, I could swear she liked to torture me. But that was like 10 years ago, but since then, it’s been in the back of my head, so that when I hear words compliment my cock, that I believe them. So I’m glad I found this place, everyone with pretty much one common goal, enlargement. :)

Newnew

It sounds like she was pretty smart except for when she got drunk, which could be said about most of us:) .

Sad you let something like that ruin a loving relationship. Men (myself included especially) can be really stupid sometimes.

Yeah, but we were young and what she did fucked with my head, saying 2 things, just didn’t make sense, but I think they just don’t know they are crushing egos, well at least, man lol, taking it the wrong way, but still, what she said never made sense, but after reading things on here and just pure experience, maybe she wasn’t lying to me, still a learning experience. We talk like once a year, actually around now x-mas, so I am temped to ask her about this, we will see, either way, thinking about it is still confusing, depends if she is single, if she is, then maybe sex for old time’s sake. :)

When you have a new girlfriend and she asks you about her breasts, what do you say? Do you tell her what a perfect shape they are, that they are just the right size, etc.?

Well, women do that with our dicks too.

The fact is, if you like the girl, you probably really do like her breasts too. It’s possible you have had a girl with ‘better’ breasts before, but you really don’t care that much, because you like the girl you are with. Women are like that with our dicks too.

But don’t worry; if you base the validity of your relationship on how you view each others wobbly bits, it’s a shallow, pointless relationship which wasn’t going to go anywhere anyway. In a long term relationship, the breasts will sag, and guys grow guts etc.

Adult relationships are about people, not penises.

Mike,

All it will take is one relationship to quiet all that distructive self-talk. You have made many assumptions about other people’s attitudes and penis sizes. None of it may be true; it is rather a reflection of the thoughts swirling around in your head. Certainly there is one cute, tight, Australian girl out there for you!! It only takes one.

Not to burst your bubble, but having a big dick is not all it’s cracked up to be. It is by definition abnormal. In excites envy in both men and women, and this is not always a good thing. Add to that the fact that big dicks make oral sex difficult, and you can see that an all-round optimal dick may be something short of big.

Your friend’s “bitchy” girlfriend was probably complimenting his oral skills and general approach to love making. It was a great compliment but probably not one that was based on his penis size. If it were, then why would she assume you could learn the critical skills from him? You can’t learn to have a bigger penis (at least not without Thunders ;) ).

Both of my college appartment mates had huge dicks compared to mine. But my girlfriend was the most orgasmic and vocal. It became a joke among us. I had the smallest dick but the girls liked me best! I was 6.5 BPEL x 5. I always complained about my own size but, like your friend, could never shake a girl once we had sex. It’s not about the dick. It’s about your general attractiveness and the quality of attention you pay to the women (and much more the latter than the former).

I think Thundersplace will turn out to be a good find for you. You will likely add an inch or more to your dick, which will help to quiet the chorus of voices in your head constantly insulting you. You might eventually relax enough to start enjoying yourself more around women, and good sexual experiences may follow.

You seem like a great guy, and I wish you good luck.

Modesto: I applaud you on the true sense of caring that is so evident in your post to MIke above. The sincere quality of the concern that you posted to him is what makes this website great. Best of everything to you man at Christmas. You could not have told Mike anything better in print or in actual truth.

To Mike……….Memorize what Modesto said and use it to combat the thoughts swirling around in your head. Or, read it again and again until it become a part of you. Modesto’s words can change your Christmas and New Year.

Spot on fg.

Yeah but sometimes you would just like to know what was actually the truth, and I don’t want to rekindle really, I just want to bang her. :) I know shes not the right one for me, our lives went in opposite directions.

You are jealous and insulted because your ex-girlfriend screwed a guy with a bigger dick than yours and didn’t like it? Why wouldn’t you be ecstatic? Her comments at the party confirmed your perfection as far as her tastes and preferences are concerned. Your response must have been a slap in the face to her, since now you seem to be pissed because she didn’t like super big dicks and yours wasn’t one of them. Dude, it’s not about being big; it’s about being good. That’s what your girlfriend was telling you. Maybe she was lying about your being the “biggest,” but that kind of what lie is hot and very forgivable. Maybe what she meant was you’re the biggest that she actually liked.

Ya know, this thread seems to go in a cycle: man explains insecurity, others try to convince him that his worth is not in his penis, man explains insecurity, others…

Penile Dysmorphia isn’t something that can be assuaged with the old “dick to breasts” comparison. It cannot be assuaged with they love the whole package comparison. It comes from the ubiquitous “does size matter” topic and from our relationships with our mothers, our need to satisfy/please them from our childhood.

The stuff that feeds the machine, a perfect example is Newnew997’s story, is the fact that women placate us, doing their best to make their lover feel special….the best…even though there are bigger, there are better. With Newnew, this girl didn’t diss his cock; she didn’t put him down. She merely said some other guy hurt her with his length. I can relate to your heartache Newnew.

My story:

I started out about 6x5. Never got any out of the ordinary comments except for the occasional vindictive bitch trying to put me down. A few years ago, I fell in love with a girl. I was fine, but the cock insecurity was slowly—-insidiously—-creeping into my heart and poisoning our relationship. The catalyst? One night, we were out as a group hangin’ with a few gay guys. Of course, cocks came up. She mentioned if one “is too big it hurts.” Well, with my 6x5, that was something I had never done.

The comment destroyed my ego. I grilled her to tell me who it was with this big dick. After many a fight, she ultimately acquiesced…telling me who it was. I broke into her email, found the guy, created a fake condom survey and e-mailed him, hoping to find out truly what he was packing. He never responded. A few months go by. The thoughts of her being banged consume my day. I can’t do work. I can’t sleep. I’m fucked.

Finally, I decide to check into lengthening surgery. I concoct a whole plan on how I can do it without anyone ever knowing, including deceive her. I was illogical, demented, and just plain on a mission. I told her I was going away on a trip (with somewhat convincing detail) and left to get surgery at 6:00AM.

At the office, as I changed into surgery attire, my phone rang. It was her, calling me. I let it go to voicemail…sat on the toilet and cried my eyes out. I sobbed, embarrassed…terrified of what I was going to do. But I had to do it. It was the only way.

The doctor was pleasant, but his pin stripe suit was tawdry…and I couldn’t help but think he was wearing the skin of insecurity of all the people that come through his office. He took me into the OR and put me under. I came out dizzy, with a drain running out of my pelvic area. The nurse brought me down and I had an old friend pick me up. He was a bit slow and bought my explanation that I had shoulder surgery.

With my girlfriend still thinking I was on a trip, I snuck back into my apartment, laid in bed and pounded vicodin. I just wanted to wake up with a big dick. 6 hours later, I got in my car and truly did go on a trip. The lengthening surgery was supposedly minor but it didn’t feel minor. It was sore, red, and irritated. After 5 weeks, I immediately started hanging with a vac hanger.

When I returned from my trip, I couldn’t wait to see my girl. I missed her. I was now more mentally stable, as I believed that I could hang my way to a big cock. But something happened I didn’t anticipate: the girl was a sherlock holmes in training. She had spotted my car in my driveway after I’d gotten back from my surgery. She’d found me in a lie and it had broken our trust. She thought I was having an affair.

She pressed me and I denied it. Still, she was relentless, ultimately finding a prescription for antibiotics from my surgeon. She then looked him up and quickly discovered what I had actually done. She confronted me on it and I went nuts, like a cornered lion. I then fell into a deep abyss of depression, thinking the only way out of the mess was to kill myself. The possible humiliation I would feel if anyone every found out was too much. It terrified me.

I went to therapy. It didn’t work. Soon, because of the broken trust, she began to doubt everything I told her. This combined with my need to bang girls—-which stemmed from my insecurity—-lead us down a fatal path. We broke up…she was heartbroken and threatened to tell everyone what I had done. I ran, never to see her again.

This was three years ago. I write this story as I hang…the first time I have ever mentioned it to anyone…and I cried through it all. I don’t want to hear from anyone about dick vs. breasts…about women loving the whole package…I just want the men on this forum to know that they are not alone. I feel the pain of all of you who have similar experiences and I hope that my story assuages some of the hurt you may have felt.

Bubba

I am a raving lunatic, just never had penis issues.

I know it is hard for some of you to imagine or even believe but I have never ever had any kind of penis insecurities or self esteem issues concerning members of the opposite sex. By the same token I am so not joking about the raving lunatic thing. ;)

I also have enough empathy for a buss full of tree huggers and I feel for you guys more that I can say. This thread especially is cram packed with emotional suffering courtesy of mens relationships with their penises. Sometimes a bit of actual malice on the part of females plays a part but so often it is Body dysmorphia combined with generic insecurities.

Glad you are able to open up and share, bubba. Simply not having that as a huge and evil secret can make an amazing difference in your life. Hopefully you will find what so many guys before you have found as well. While Thunders can and will deliver on the magic of making your wee-wee bigger that is only part of the miracle. Give this place and the people here a chance. Keep being open and sharing a bit with what you are experiencing emotionally. You may just find that we can help with a lot more than making your penis larger.

Bubba, :inlove: , and the rest of you as well.

Thank you for that post Bubba, I’m sure that wasn’t easy to recount. What you should understand, though, is there are a lot of young men on this site who just need some reassuring; you sound like you have some serious issues, and I complete appreciate that, but there are others here who are just young and alone, and think they’re the only one’s feeling these insecurities - mostly, they just need to know that others feel the same and some solid advice.

And I agree, this thread is a cycle of sad tale/reassurance, but understand that these are not just posts in a thread - everyone of these posts is a guy, alone in front of his computer, coming forward with his deepest insecurities. Every post should be treated as an individual. In the real world, what kind of response do you think you would garner by coming forward with dick insecurity? You’d be told the same shit we all hear from day one : Size doesn’t matter, get over it, and there’s got to be something seriously wrong with you for wanting a bigger one. At this site, we might acknowledge that, yes, we’re all a little crazy, but that’s only part of the story.

This thread is just an opener to, “so, why are you here?” for some.

That’s my point. My issues aren’t serious. They are a cock centric, just as those of every other guy who spends time every day pulling their dick. Today I will go about my day, laugh and smile, and genuinely be happy…because I am. I posted my story because I wanted to contribute to the others who have posted their trauma…and let them know that I stand with them on the same page. It’s not “serious” or “different,” it’s exactly the same. The pain of my story is not at all a function of content…only repression.

Do you guys ever wonder whether dick dysmorphia is in large part a matter of penises being “private” and therefore never discussed? If something is buried and secret I think there is a tendency for one’s paranoia and imagination to run wild and exaggerate all sorts of concerns and threats. I wonder whether people raised in cultures where nakedness is more accepted have fewer issues.