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Jelqs/girth routine without porn

12

Jelqs/girth routine without porn

Hi everyone, I have an interesting question to ask you.

Finally after several attempts I can say that I have almost completely come out of the porn addiction. I used to look at them every day, mostly to help me with jelqs.

Now that I’m done, how do I do girth exercises without getting an erection with porn?

I can’t get excited on command with my thoughts, can any of you help me?

Thanks


Start: 01/01/2021 16,5NBP 18,5BP 12,5MEG

Now: 01/01/2022. ?NBP 20,2BP 12,7MEG

It is a part of your brain reprogramming schedule. It would take up to 4 weeks for your brain to get used to having arousal without visual stimuli of any kind. I also ditched the porn when I started my PE routines and I couldn’t be happier. However, I am still waiting for the right moment to test if quitting porn helps mitigate some premature ejaculation problems that I had with my girl.

A general rule of thumb: Change the way you masturbate! I found out that lube and intercourse-based masturbation is far more pleasing than the plain old “beating the meat” type of masturbation we all did somewhere in our teen years. Slow, steady, and with a sense for what happens under your hand is the way to go.


Starting point - 15.5 centimeters BPFLS=BPEL, 12 cm. MSEG /// Goal: 20 cm BPFLS, 18 cm BPEL, 14 cm MSEG

Let the marathon begin - Flowsky's progression

Yes, this is difficult to go through! I relied on porn for PE needs. I never did PE without porno on. But my EQ during PE and pumping was horrible. Now that I’ve quit porn my EQ is better than its ever been and PE is actually way more fun and easier now that I can do it without even looking at a picture of a pretty girl.

I basically gave up porn completely. No pictures, no videos, no pornhub and related sites, and finally no chatrooms. Near the end of March this year is when I quit. It was very weird for about two weeks. But I had to quit porn, I could not get hard without it; I couldn’t even get hard to have sex with my wife and she was really wanting it so so bad, begging me to give it to her, but I couldn’t get even a semi.

So, how do you get hard without porno? How is it possible!? You have to think about it all differently.

First, and most importantly, you have to really start to get into yourself. This is a time to really get into self-love of your body, and especially your penis. You have to pay more attention to your cock than ever before. Think about what you did with your cock while watching porn? Were you paying attention to your cock, or the porno? I bet you paid attention to the porno. I did. My cock was just something hard and wet in my hand while I watched the screen. Now that I don’t look at it at all, my cock in my hand is a wonderful, beautiful, amazing piece of ME. Its attached to me, it is a part of me, it does not define me but I want it to be better. To be sexier, bigger, more beautiful, stronger, harder, longer. I want to love myself more now than ever before. I need to love my cock more now than ever before. Especially now that there is no porn on.

So when you doing jelqs for girth, where are you? Are you in your bedroom? In the bathroom? Kitchen?! Do you have a mirror? When I started PE in 2003 I did jelqs and stretches in the bathroom at the sink in front of the mirror. That was the ONLY place I did PE. It was just me all alone, a bottle of lube, and a watch to keep track of my minute-long stretches and 1-second jelq stroke rhythm. I didn’t have a porno problem back then, but I looked at it when possible, not frequently, but every now and then. I like to look at the mirror because I can see my cock in the mirror and ask myself “what does it look like from a different angle?” and “how good does it look, how good do I look, how does it all look?” and these kinds of thoughts make me love my cock and I create a good body positive attitude.

That’s what we all need: a good, strong body-positive attitude and frame of mind. Porn takes that away from us 100%. It shows us women we don’t think we’ll ever be able to have sex with, even though they are “amateurs” or “girl next door”. It shows us men who have perfect fit strong bodies and enormous cocks that are always 100% EQ super hard. And we think “I wonder if I’m big enough for a girl like that…I wonder if I look good enough to get a girlfriend…I wonder if…I am scared I’m not…I don’t feel like…” and all the other negative things that porn makes us think, feel, and believe.

So how can you actually get a good strong erection, that you feel good about and that makes you feel good, if you’re looking at porn? Porn shows us what and who we are NOT, not what and who we actually are.

I started to get over it all and gain my erections again by masturbating alone with nothing on. It was very hard to do! But after a few tries I could get hard and cum. I just kept trying. I never went back to porn when it seemed like I couldn’t do it. I thought about looking at porn, to make it easier to get hard and cum, but I didn’t. I stayed true to myself and within maybe 3 weeks I was able to get hard much faster than when I used porn, and I could stay hard longer with less stimulation. Sex with my wife started back up and we’ve been going at it good and strong since early May this year.

The first time I did PE without porn I was scared. I didn’t think I’d get hard at all, even though I was getting hard pretty easy and having sex with my wife, and also getting hard and masturbating for about 10 minutes before I had to cum (I used to jerk off for almost an hour sitting watching porn, so 10 minutes without porn can feel like a LIFETIME and it takes forever, its such a weird feeling!). But, I imagined being in the bathroom back in 2003 and doing it fine no problem. And, as I quickly found, I could focus on my body and my cock and believe I was good and getting better, strong and willing, looking good and feeling better, and that I am hard and getting hard is like breathing its so easy. I made it happen. I just had to try and believe I could do it.

I know I might make it sound easy. I know it is not easy and it is actually hard. But I was there man, with a fucking wet noodle that felt like nothing in my hand with my sexy wife wiggling and begging for me to fuck her hard, pussy wet and dripping, gaping open for me, and I couldn’t do it. So if anyone knows how terrible porn is and what it can reduce a man to, its me. Yet, here I am, 8 months of no porn now, getting harder than I can remember, doing PE and pumping better than ever, and feeling better about myself and everything than ever before. And I’m 45 years old now, so I’m not letting my youth help me with all of this, if anything my age is fighting against my cock. But I’m winning because I want to win and believe I can win!

If you try to do PE and cannot get hard, you are feeling like its impossible. I know, I’ve been there! So instead of trying to do PE with no porn, relearn how to masturbate and spend sexual time with yourself. Instead of trying to find thoughts and fantasies to help you get erect, focus on only you and you alone, focus your mind and intention on you cock, your groin, your pelvis. Breathe and imagine the energy of the world circulating through you with every breathe. Relax and enjoy what you feel when you touch yourself. Really get into every tiny little detail of every little stimulation and sensation you experience. Love yourself and your body above all things. Appreciate your penis for what it is and really pay close attention to it and how it feels.

Quitting porn means the man has to start to focus and love himself again. Porn makes you love nothing. The longer you continue to try to masturbate and cum without porn the easier it is to get an erection in any situation. Try to get hard in other rooms of your house if you can. Or standing up. Or lying down, or on your knees, or sitting. Get hard and then move around the room, lay down then stand up, then sit down, then stand then on your knees, etc.. This helps your body move blood around quickly and also trains your penis to stay hard as you change your body position. I used to get flaccid when I went from my knees or standing to laying flat on my back. I couldn’t even get an erection anymore if lying on my back, that’s how bad my ED was from porn. But now I can get hard very fast on my back and it stays hard longer now in that position than ever before. It is possible!!

When you do your jelqs, it sounds like you probably get hard and then let it start to go soft so you can do your jelqs (if you are doing jelqs fully erect DON’T DO THAT IT CAN HURT YOU!!). So when you’re alone with no porn just focus on how awesome you are and how good it feels to stroke your cock. You are 18.5cm bone pressed? You are as big as me, and my wife says I have a “big cock” and anything that close to 19-20cm is a big cock don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!!! Tell yourself that you love your big cock and you want it to grow and get bigger and more powerful. Focus your energy down and through your cock as you stroke, make it feel even better to you. Tell yourself how much you love your erection, how good it looks, how big you are, and imagine getting harder and larger. If you can jerk off successfully without porn several times, then you can do PE without it too.

Sorry I wrote so much! I just want to let you know that you are not alone and that some of us go through this too. It is hard to figure out, and sometimes scary. I was scared, I used to cry my eyes out to my wife. I even told her I didn’t even want to ever try to have sex again because the stress was so terrible I didn’t want to feel that way anymore; I wanted to feel normal again. Porn is not normal!! They push incest porn now as the #1 kind of porn to watch. Fucking disgusting!! That’s not you! You are awesome and better than that!

Show your body who’s boss and let your cock get hard and love it with all your heart, mind and soul. We are here to help, please check in and let us know how you are doing!! You got this! Good luck!


Starting length, Spring 2003: bpel 6 3/8", bpfsl ~6 1/2", flaccid ~3-4" (never measured flaccid stretched or hanging flaccid; starting girth was probably ~5"-5 1/4")

Summer 2004: bpel 7 7/8", bpfsl 8 1/8", flaccid ~4", erect girth 5.3"

Spring 2018: bpel 7 1/4", bpfsl 7 5/8", erect girth 5 1/8"; Spring 2020: bpel 7 3/4", bpfsl 8", erect girth 5 3/8". Current - August 2023: bpel 7 3/4", bpfsl 8", erect girth mid shaft 5 1/4" (5 1/2" at base)

Originally Posted by flowsky
It is a part of your brain reprogramming schedule. It would take up to 4 weeks for your brain to get used to having arousal without visual stimuli of any kind. I also ditched the porn when I started my PE routines and I couldn’t be happier. However, I am still waiting for the right moment to test if quitting porn helps mitigate some premature ejaculation problems that I had with my girl.

A general rule of thumb: Change the way you masturbate! I found out that lube and intercourse-based masturbation is far more pleasing than the plain old “beating the meat” type of masturbation we all did somewhere in our teen years. Slow, steady, and with a sense for what happens under your hand is the way to go.

OMG flowsky, that is a great way to describe changes to masturbation!!!! Yes, lube for sure and something that replicates intercourse. I recommend to everyone to masturbate in any position except sitting down. Standing, laying flat, on your knees, anything other than sitting in a chair or something like a chair.

I had terrible premature ejac too as I was trying to have sex with my wife before I ditched porn and during my transition away from it. As soon as I got hard I’d cum. Without porn its like I’m in full control of my orgasm and ejaculation and can cum when and where I want to again like before I had problems.


Starting length, Spring 2003: bpel 6 3/8", bpfsl ~6 1/2", flaccid ~3-4" (never measured flaccid stretched or hanging flaccid; starting girth was probably ~5"-5 1/4")

Summer 2004: bpel 7 7/8", bpfsl 8 1/8", flaccid ~4", erect girth 5.3"

Spring 2018: bpel 7 1/4", bpfsl 7 5/8", erect girth 5 1/8"; Spring 2020: bpel 7 3/4", bpfsl 8", erect girth 5 3/8". Current - August 2023: bpel 7 3/4", bpfsl 8", erect girth mid shaft 5 1/4" (5 1/2" at base)

In my overall, a little more than 3 years of PEing I almost always watch porn while doing it, to keep EQ up.

I’ve read many threads here saying how harmful porn is. I always thought I was immune to it. This thread here, has really caught my attention!!

Ever since I started my decon 3 weeks ago, I’ve been trying to look at pics, instead of actual porn. Trying to ease into a no porn life. Well, I have a little more than 5 weeks left on decon. What a great time to give it up all together!

It certainly won’t be easy for me. I must admit, honestly I enjoy porn. I only watch amateur, homemade, threesomes, & female orgasms.

But after reading this thread, I need to learn to love and enjoy myself (not someone I will never see/fuck). It can only help me make my penis healthier, stronger & eventually bigger.

So I’m gonna start today, no porn at all. Hopefully in 5 weeks, I will condition myself to not need porn to do my PE routine. It won’t be easy. But I’m gonna try my hardest to stay true. It’s the perfect time to start. Thanks for giving me the motivation and wish me luck!! I


Start 8/15/18-BPEL-6.75” MEG-4.625”

2/17/20-BPEL-7.125” MEG-5”

Goal- 8”x5.5”

Originally Posted by pumpedmember
Yes, this is difficult to go through! I relied on porn for PE needs. I never did PE without porno on. But my EQ during PE and pumping was horrible. Now that I’ve quit porn my EQ is better than its ever been and PE is actually way more fun and easier now that I can do it without even looking at a picture of a pretty girl.

I basically gave up porn completely. No pictures, no videos, no pornhub and related sites, and finally no chatrooms. Near the end of March this year is when I quit. It was very weird for about two weeks. But I had to quit porn, I could not get hard without it; I couldn’t even get hard to have sex with my wife and she was really wanting it so so bad, begging me to give it to her, but I couldn’t get even a semi.

So, how do you get hard without porno? How is it possible!? You have to think about it all differently.

First, and most importantly, you have to really start to get into yourself. This is a time to really get into self-love of your body, and especially your penis. You have to pay more attention to your cock than ever before. Think about what you did with your cock while watching porn? Were you paying attention to your cock, or the porno? I bet you paid attention to the porno. I did. My cock was just something hard and wet in my hand while I watched the screen. Now that I don’t look at it at all, my cock in my hand is a wonderful, beautiful, amazing piece of ME. Its attached to me, it is a part of me, it does not define me but I want it to be better. To be sexier, bigger, more beautiful, stronger, harder, longer. I want to love myself more now than ever before. I need to love my cock more now than ever before. Especially now that there is no porn on.

So when you doing jelqs for girth, where are you? Are you in your bedroom? In the bathroom? Kitchen?! Do you have a mirror? When I started PE in 2003 I did jelqs and stretches in the bathroom at the sink in front of the mirror. That was the ONLY place I did PE. It was just me all alone, a bottle of lube, and a watch to keep track of my minute-long stretches and 1-second jelq stroke rhythm. I didn’t have a porno problem back then, but I looked at it when possible, not frequently, but every now and then. I like to look at the mirror because I can see my cock in the mirror and ask myself “what does it look like from a different angle?” and “how good does it look, how good do I look, how does it all look?” and these kinds of thoughts make me love my cock and I create a good body positive attitude.

That’s what we all need: a good, strong body-positive attitude and frame of mind. Porn takes that away from us 100%. It shows us women we don’t think we’ll ever be able to have sex with, even though they are “amateurs” or “girl next door”. It shows us men who have perfect fit strong bodies and enormous cocks that are always 100% EQ super hard. And we think “I wonder if I’m big enough for a girl like that…I wonder if I look good enough to get a girlfriend…I wonder if…I am scared I’m not…I don’t feel like…” and all the other negative things that porn makes us think, feel, and believe.

So how can you actually get a good strong erection, that you feel good about and that makes you feel good, if you’re looking at porn? Porn shows us what and who we are NOT, not what and who we actually are.

I started to get over it all and gain my erections again by masturbating alone with nothing on. It was very hard to do! But after a few tries I could get hard and cum. I just kept trying. I never went back to porn when it seemed like I couldn’t do it. I thought about looking at porn, to make it easier to get hard and cum, but I didn’t. I stayed true to myself and within maybe 3 weeks I was able to get hard much faster than when I used porn, and I could stay hard longer with less stimulation. Sex with my wife started back up and we’ve been going at it good and strong since early May this year.

The first time I did PE without porn I was scared. I didn’t think I’d get hard at all, even though I was getting hard pretty easy and having sex with my wife, and also getting hard and masturbating for about 10 minutes before I had to cum (I used to jerk off for almost an hour sitting watching porn, so 10 minutes without porn can feel like a LIFETIME and it takes forever, its such a weird feeling!). But, I imagined being in the bathroom back in 2003 and doing it fine no problem. And, as I quickly found, I could focus on my body and my cock and believe I was good and getting better, strong and willing, looking good and feeling better, and that I am hard and getting hard is like breathing its so easy. I made it happen. I just had to try and believe I could do it.

I know I might make it sound easy. I know it is not easy and it is actually hard. But I was there man, with a fucking wet noodle that felt like nothing in my hand with my sexy wife wiggling and begging for me to fuck her hard, pussy wet and dripping, gaping open for me, and I couldn’t do it. So if anyone knows how terrible porn is and what it can reduce a man to, its me. Yet, here I am, 8 months of no porn now, getting harder than I can remember, doing PE and pumping better than ever, and feeling better about myself and everything than ever before. And I’m 45 years old now, so I’m not letting my youth help me with all of this, if anything my age is fighting against my cock. But I’m winning because I want to win and believe I can win!

If you try to do PE and cannot get hard, you are feeling like its impossible. I know, I’ve been there! So instead of trying to do PE with no porn, relearn how to masturbate and spend sexual time with yourself. Instead of trying to find thoughts and fantasies to help you get erect, focus on only you and you alone, focus your mind and intention on you cock, your groin, your pelvis. Breathe and imagine the energy of the world circulating through you with every breathe. Relax and enjoy what you feel when you touch yourself. Really get into every tiny little detail of every little stimulation and sensation you experience. Love yourself and your body above all things. Appreciate your penis for what it is and really pay close attention to it and how it feels.

Quitting porn means the man has to start to focus and love himself again. Porn makes you love nothing. The longer you continue to try to masturbate and cum without porn the easier it is to get an erection in any situation. Try to get hard in other rooms of your house if you can. Or standing up. Or lying down, or on your knees, or sitting. Get hard and then move around the room, lay down then stand up, then sit down, then stand then on your knees, etc.. This helps your body move blood around quickly and also trains your penis to stay hard as you change your body position. I used to get flaccid when I went from my knees or standing to laying flat on my back. I couldn’t even get an erection anymore if lying on my back, that’s how bad my ED was from porn. But now I can get hard very fast on my back and it stays hard longer now in that position than ever before. It is possible!!

When you do your jelqs, it sounds like you probably get hard and then let it start to go soft so you can do your jelqs (if you are doing jelqs fully erect DON’T DO THAT IT CAN HURT YOU!!). So when you’re alone with no porn just focus on how awesome you are and how good it feels to stroke your cock. You are 18.5cm bone pressed? You are as big as me, and my wife says I have a “big cock” and anything that close to 19-20cm is a big cock don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!!! Tell yourself that you love your big cock and you want it to grow and get bigger and more powerful. Focus your energy down and through your cock as you stroke, make it feel even better to you. Tell yourself how much you love your erection, how good it looks, how big you are, and imagine getting harder and larger. If you can jerk off successfully without porn several times, then you can do PE without it too.

Sorry I wrote so much! I just want to let you know that you are not alone and that some of us go through this too. It is hard to figure out, and sometimes scary. I was scared, I used to cry my eyes out to my wife. I even told her I didn’t even want to ever try to have sex again because the stress was so terrible I didn’t want to feel that way anymore; I wanted to feel normal again. Porn is not normal!! They push incest porn now as the #1 kind of porn to watch. Fucking disgusting!! That’s not you! You are awesome and better than that!

Show your body who’s boss and let your cock get hard and love it with all your heart, mind and soul. We are here to help, please check in and let us know how you are doing!! You got this! Good luck!

Bravo for taking the time to write this … I for one really appreciate it … you too flowsky

I am living the pornfree life now after way too much porn over decades … no idea what damage I was doing … just amatuer stuff thankfully

I think I ve viewed porn about 5 days in the last 3 months or so … I thought nofap hard mode was the way to go initially but after much research and experimentation I ve settled on pornfree with a much reduced fapping regimen very much as described above


2003 - 6.2x5.0

MARCH 2021 - BPEL 6.6 MSEG 5.125

NOV 2021 - BPFSL 8.31 BPEL 7.6 MSEG 5.37 BEG 5.5

Originally Posted by Trizz888
Bravo for taking the time to write this … I for one really appreciate it … you too flowsky

I am living the pornfree life now after way too much porn over decades … no idea what damage I was doing … just amatuer stuff thankfully

I think I ve viewed porn about 5 days in the last 3 months or so … I thought nofap hard mode was the way to go initially but after much research and experimentation I ve settled on pornfree with a much reduced fapping regimen very much as described above

Thanks a lot I appreciate it!

Yes man ditch that shit. I know how hot porno is, it is still hot to think about. My god the women I’ve seen over the years on the screen, stupendous. But it all wears on us, it wore me down to almost nothing. Nofap is not safe, in my opinion. We men need to learn instead to love ourselves, our bodies (something guys don’t really think about, we work out, we can look good, but does that mean we LOVE our body?), and our sex. Not our sexuality, our sex. We have to own our sensations, feelings, and emotions over and around our sex. Self stimulation and bringing ourselves to orgasm is important. But not cumming AND not watching porn just leads to unhealthy living and behavior. It equates ‘getting off’ with ‘porn’; it equates ‘getting off time’ with ‘porno time’. Getting off without porn is what we need to strive for. Glad you are getting over this and moving on to a more wholesome life!


Starting length, Spring 2003: bpel 6 3/8", bpfsl ~6 1/2", flaccid ~3-4" (never measured flaccid stretched or hanging flaccid; starting girth was probably ~5"-5 1/4")

Summer 2004: bpel 7 7/8", bpfsl 8 1/8", flaccid ~4", erect girth 5.3"

Spring 2018: bpel 7 1/4", bpfsl 7 5/8", erect girth 5 1/8"; Spring 2020: bpel 7 3/4", bpfsl 8", erect girth 5 3/8". Current - August 2023: bpel 7 3/4", bpfsl 8", erect girth mid shaft 5 1/4" (5 1/2" at base)

Originally Posted by Lookinforgirth
In my overall, a little more than 3 years of PEing I almost always watch porn while doing it, to keep EQ up.
I’ve read many threads here saying how harmful porn is. I always thought I was immune to it. This thread here, has really caught my attention!!
Ever since I started my decon 3 weeks ago, I’ve been trying to look at pics, instead of actual porn. Trying to ease into a no porn life. Well, I have a little more than 5 weeks left on decon. What a great time to give it up all together!
It certainly won’t be easy for me. I must admit, honestly I enjoy porn. I only watch amateur, homemade, threesomes, & female orgasms.
But after reading this thread, I need to learn to love and enjoy myself (not someone I will never see/fuck). It can only help me make my penis healthier, stronger & eventually bigger.
So I’m gonna start today, no porn at all. Hopefully in 5 weeks, I will condition myself to not need porn to do my PE routine. It won’t be easy. But I’m gonna try my hardest to stay true. It’s the perfect time to start. Thanks for giving me the motivation and wish me luck!! I

I watched all that stuff too. Especially solo female orgasms. That’s my go-to, that’s what I want to see the most. I’m addicted to that mainly because of watching my wife’s pussy pulsate and cum (oh and squirt too!) for years and years now. Very hard to not see women cum on the screen. But it makes me so hot and so much hotter when I see my wife do it now versus the last few years as my porn viewing increased and sex with my wife due to menopause decreased. I actually swell just thinking about anything having to do with my wife’s orgasm and her pussy cumming; a year ago it didn’t make me feel like that :(

Your cock will certainly respond positively, I know it will. I know it! It has for me for sure. It is “ole reliable” once again, I don’t even have to think or wonder what my EQ will be, or if it will be hard enough to have EQ: I’m hard with her no doubt, no questions, and that’s all that matters anymore.

You can absolutely condition yourself to do PE without porn. My workouts are so much better now, so much more fulfilling inside, not just cock-oriented, but my whole being feels good when I do PE with only myself as a distraction.

You got this man, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise :)


Starting length, Spring 2003: bpel 6 3/8", bpfsl ~6 1/2", flaccid ~3-4" (never measured flaccid stretched or hanging flaccid; starting girth was probably ~5"-5 1/4")

Summer 2004: bpel 7 7/8", bpfsl 8 1/8", flaccid ~4", erect girth 5.3"

Spring 2018: bpel 7 1/4", bpfsl 7 5/8", erect girth 5 1/8"; Spring 2020: bpel 7 3/4", bpfsl 8", erect girth 5 3/8". Current - August 2023: bpel 7 3/4", bpfsl 8", erect girth mid shaft 5 1/4" (5 1/2" at base)

Thanks dude! Like I said I know it won’t be easy, but I’m gonna try my best. All this week on days I didn’t have sex ( all but one) I’ve been edging with absolutely no visual stimulation at all. I can see already that it is very healthy for sort of retraining my cock, to act the way it should, minus the porn. Which can only be a good thing.


Start 8/15/18-BPEL-6.75” MEG-4.625”

2/17/20-BPEL-7.125” MEG-5”

Goal- 8”x5.5”

Originally Posted by pumpedmember
Yes, this is difficult to go through! I relied on porn for PE needs. I never did PE without porno on. But my EQ during PE and pumping was horrible. Now that I’ve quit porn my EQ is better than its ever been and PE is actually way more fun and easier now that I can do it without even looking at a picture of a pretty girl.

I basically gave up porn completely. No pictures, no videos, no pornhub and related sites, and finally no chatrooms. Near the end of March this year is when I quit. It was very weird for about two weeks. But I had to quit porn, I could not get hard without it; I couldn’t even get hard to have sex with my wife and she was really wanting it so so bad, begging me to give it to her, but I couldn’t get even a semi.

So, how do you get hard without porno? How is it possible!? You have to think about it all differently.

First, and most importantly, you have to really start to get into yourself. This is a time to really get into self-love of your body, and especially your penis. You have to pay more attention to your cock than ever before. Think about what you did with your cock while watching porn? Were you paying attention to your cock, or the porno? I bet you paid attention to the porno. I did. My cock was just something hard and wet in my hand while I watched the screen. Now that I don’t look at it at all, my cock in my hand is a wonderful, beautiful, amazing piece of ME. Its attached to me, it is a part of me, it does not define me but I want it to be better. To be sexier, bigger, more beautiful, stronger, harder, longer. I want to love myself more now than ever before. I need to love my cock more now than ever before. Especially now that there is no porn on.

So when you doing jelqs for girth, where are you? Are you in your bedroom? In the bathroom? Kitchen?! Do you have a mirror? When I started PE in 2003 I did jelqs and stretches in the bathroom at the sink in front of the mirror. That was the ONLY place I did PE. It was just me all alone, a bottle of lube, and a watch to keep track of my minute-long stretches and 1-second jelq stroke rhythm. I didn’t have a porno problem back then, but I looked at it when possible, not frequently, but every now and then. I like to look at the mirror because I can see my cock in the mirror and ask myself “what does it look like from a different angle?” and “how good does it look, how good do I look, how does it all look?” and these kinds of thoughts make me love my cock and I create a good body positive attitude.

That’s what we all need: a good, strong body-positive attitude and frame of mind. Porn takes that away from us 100%. It shows us women we don’t think we’ll ever be able to have sex with, even though they are “amateurs” or “girl next door”. It shows us men who have perfect fit strong bodies and enormous cocks that are always 100% EQ super hard. And we think “I wonder if I’m big enough for a girl like that…I wonder if I look good enough to get a girlfriend…I wonder if…I am scared I’m not…I don’t feel like…” and all the other negative things that porn makes us think, feel, and believe.

So how can you actually get a good strong erection, that you feel good about and that makes you feel good, if you’re looking at porn? Porn shows us what and who we are NOT, not what and who we actually are.

I started to get over it all and gain my erections again by masturbating alone with nothing on. It was very hard to do! But after a few tries I could get hard and cum. I just kept trying. I never went back to porn when it seemed like I couldn’t do it. I thought about looking at porn, to make it easier to get hard and cum, but I didn’t. I stayed true to myself and within maybe 3 weeks I was able to get hard much faster than when I used porn, and I could stay hard longer with less stimulation. Sex with my wife started back up and we’ve been going at it good and strong since early May this year.

The first time I did PE without porn I was scared. I didn’t think I’d get hard at all, even though I was getting hard pretty easy and having sex with my wife, and also getting hard and masturbating for about 10 minutes before I had to cum (I used to jerk off for almost an hour sitting watching porn, so 10 minutes without porn can feel like a LIFETIME and it takes forever, its such a weird feeling!). But, I imagined being in the bathroom back in 2003 and doing it fine no problem. And, as I quickly found, I could focus on my body and my cock and believe I was good and getting better, strong and willing, looking good and feeling better, and that I am hard and getting hard is like breathing its so easy. I made it happen. I just had to try and believe I could do it.

I know I might make it sound easy. I know it is not easy and it is actually hard. But I was there man, with a fucking wet noodle that felt like nothing in my hand with my sexy wife wiggling and begging for me to fuck her hard, pussy wet and dripping, gaping open for me, and I couldn’t do it. So if anyone knows how terrible porn is and what it can reduce a man to, its me. Yet, here I am, 8 months of no porn now, getting harder than I can remember, doing PE and pumping better than ever, and feeling better about myself and everything than ever before. And I’m 45 years old now, so I’m not letting my youth help me with all of this, if anything my age is fighting against my cock. But I’m winning because I want to win and believe I can win!

If you try to do PE and cannot get hard, you are feeling like its impossible. I know, I’ve been there! So instead of trying to do PE with no porn, relearn how to masturbate and spend sexual time with yourself. Instead of trying to find thoughts and fantasies to help you get erect, focus on only you and you alone, focus your mind and intention on you cock, your groin, your pelvis. Breathe and imagine the energy of the world circulating through you with every breathe. Relax and enjoy what you feel when you touch yourself. Really get into every tiny little detail of every little stimulation and sensation you experience. Love yourself and your body above all things. Appreciate your penis for what it is and really pay close attention to it and how it feels.

Quitting porn means the man has to start to focus and love himself again. Porn makes you love nothing. The longer you continue to try to masturbate and cum without porn the easier it is to get an erection in any situation. Try to get hard in other rooms of your house if you can. Or standing up. Or lying down, or on your knees, or sitting. Get hard and then move around the room, lay down then stand up, then sit down, then stand then on your knees, etc.. This helps your body move blood around quickly and also trains your penis to stay hard as you change your body position. I used to get flaccid when I went from my knees or standing to laying flat on my back. I couldn’t even get an erection anymore if lying on my back, that’s how bad my ED was from porn. But now I can get hard very fast on my back and it stays hard longer now in that position than ever before. It is possible!!

When you do your jelqs, it sounds like you probably get hard and then let it start to go soft so you can do your jelqs (if you are doing jelqs fully erect DON’T DO THAT IT CAN HURT YOU!!). So when you’re alone with no porn just focus on how awesome you are and how good it feels to stroke your cock. You are 18.5cm bone pressed? You are as big as me, and my wife says I have a “big cock” and anything that close to 19-20cm is a big cock don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!!! Tell yourself that you love your big cock and you want it to grow and get bigger and more powerful. Focus your energy down and through your cock as you stroke, make it feel even better to you. Tell yourself how much you love your erection, how good it looks, how big you are, and imagine getting harder and larger. If you can jerk off successfully without porn several times, then you can do PE without it too.

Sorry I wrote so much! I just want to let you know that you are not alone and that some of us go through this too. It is hard to figure out, and sometimes scary. I was scared, I used to cry my eyes out to my wife. I even told her I didn’t even want to ever try to have sex again because the stress was so terrible I didn’t want to feel that way anymore; I wanted to feel normal again. Porn is not normal!! They push incest porn now as the #1 kind of porn to watch. Fucking disgusting!! That’s not you! You are awesome and better than that!

Show your body who’s boss and let your cock get hard and love it with all your heart, mind and soul. We are here to help, please check in and let us know how you are doing!! You got this! Good luck!

That was a brilliant post. This needs to be filed into a must-read part of the site as it illustrates how our best intentions of growing our dicks can lead us down a path of dysfunction and dissatisfaction for us and our partners.

Desensitization is such a very real thing. I’m not a porn addict by any means, I’ve gone days and weeks without watching it, but I found not so long ago that standard porn was getting so boring that I couldn’t even get aroused. I’d have to page through pages and pages to find the hottest chick or the raunchiest shit to even get the little guy to budge. Even gonzo wasn’t doing the trick after awhile.

What really got concerning about it was after I sustained a PE injury and having severe EQ decline as a result, it made the psychological aspect of getting though the EQ issues even harder and I really got into my own head, fearing I damaged myself. Feeling no arousal from porn whatsoever combined with no arousal in my member really fucked with my head. I can imagine this being the case for guys with ED issues too. The psychological factor of your junk not working properly combined with desensitization from watching years of porn might be half the battle in and of itself. Out of obsession and fear about their ED, many guys may be drawn to porn to try to get stimulus to their penis, not realizing it may actually be causing the opposite effect and further desensitized them and deepening the psychological gap necessary to get an erection.

For the couple weeks of decon, I completely stopped watching porn and I did find that it helped allow myself to “feel” more and be less distracted by the external stimuli and focus more on internal stimuli as my EQ recovered. It also helped me to completely disconnect from the worry and concern I had about my EQ as I just decided to go about my day as if nothing were wrong, didn’t think about sex, porn, nor did I even touch him or think about PE for the couple weeks. I just wanted to break the psychological factor which was what I felt was holding me back more than the injury itself, which was probably the easiest and quickest to heal to begin with. Fortunately my EQ has since fully recovered and I’m back pumping again though still taking a break from stretching exercises due to a mild recurrence after attempting to ease back into it.


Start date: 10/06/2021, NBPEL: 6in, MEG: 5in

UPDATE: 12/14/2022, NPBEL: 7.25in, MEG:5.25

Wow really nice, congratulations at you bro. It’s true that the porn destory the brain and the mind, it allow to get panic attack and depression, this not compatible with the human and create big trouble. By the way, using sex toys for masturbation it’s a porn too ?

Originally Posted by thug01
Wow really nice, congratulations at you bro. It’s true that the porn destory the brain and the mind, it allow to get panic attack and depression, this not compatible with the human and create big trouble. By the way, using sex toys for masturbation it’s a porn too ?

No I don’t believe sex toys=porno. Its just the toy and you: there is no screen, no actresses, no pornhub, no chatroom. My wife and I have dozens of sex toys. Lots of fleshlights, lots of dildos of all kinds and shapes and materials, vibrators and wands, clit and cock pumps, you name it we have it. Now if you get a Fleshlight and its modeled after a porn star, and you actively look at the box and picture of her while using the Fleshlight, maybe that’s like “porno” but its pretty mild. You didn’t search for it online and are not watching something. You are just using the image that came with your sex toy, which is pretty mild if you ask me. Its even more mild than going to a store to buy a pornographic magazine or something that shows female nudity.

Sex toys are made for your pleasure, and the pleasure of your sex partner whoever they might be. You can use a sex toy on someone, they can use one on you (or they can use more than one on you!). Masturbation and self pleasure are 100% healthy and good for all of us humans. Masturbation with porno is not healthy: it affects everyone differently, some can handle it while others cannot. But it all weighs negatively on the user of the porn.

Fantasy is still good! Sex toys can help create fantasy and make it grow and become very good. Sex toys also feel very very good and can create variety and different feelings for masturbation, which makes masturbation more fun and easier to do. This is how I view sex toys and porno together :)


Starting length, Spring 2003: bpel 6 3/8", bpfsl ~6 1/2", flaccid ~3-4" (never measured flaccid stretched or hanging flaccid; starting girth was probably ~5"-5 1/4")

Summer 2004: bpel 7 7/8", bpfsl 8 1/8", flaccid ~4", erect girth 5.3"

Spring 2018: bpel 7 1/4", bpfsl 7 5/8", erect girth 5 1/8"; Spring 2020: bpel 7 3/4", bpfsl 8", erect girth 5 3/8". Current - August 2023: bpel 7 3/4", bpfsl 8", erect girth mid shaft 5 1/4" (5 1/2" at base)

Originally Posted by flowsky
A general rule of thumb: Change the way you masturbate! I found out that lube and intercourse-based masturbation is far more pleasing than the plain old “beating the meat” type of masturbation we all did somewhere in our teen years. Slow, steady, and with a sense for what happens under your hand is the way to go.

This. If you’re used to porn just try putting some lube/baby oil on your limp dick, close your eyes, lay back, think of a nice experience/fantasy and start stimulating your head. You should, after a while, get hard


My progress Start: c. 5" NBP x 5.5 MEG

Aug 21: 5.9" NBP x 5.7 MEG

Nov 21: 6.5” NBP GOAL: 7" NBP

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