Jelq only, missus helps but very concerned

Hi guys,.

Okay in know you probs heard this time over.

My missus actually does my jelq for me, but I’m too scared to measure my own penis in case I find out it’s smaller than it is, I think I’m about 6.25 x 5 ish.. I would like to be(very very wishful thinking) 8x6.or close too.

Now my GF says I’m quite big(I’m her 1st and only) but I think she says that just to make me feel better to be honest.

I guess it doesn’t help that all my Ex’s have said I’m small or not very big..

Now I know it doesn’t help but she’s a bit girl n she can (relatively squashed) get 2 hands and a little more out the top (doesn’t help I know.)

I’m that concerned about my size that I’m actually finding it harder and harder to get horny and fully erect because I’m embarrassed about my size and what my GF is ‘REALLY’ thinking when we have intercourse.

My question is - can I gain anything from just jelq wet or dry - I’m too embarrassed to use stretchers and other tools I really just want to stick to manual :)

Thanks for reading and taking the time.

4wheeler:

While the concept of having the missus do your jelqs for you has a certain appeal, it lacks one important element, and that is feedback. She can’t sense how much pressure she’s creating in your dick, and that is important. You want enough to be useful, and not so much as to be damaging. She’s probably NOT jelqing you so hard as to do damage, but I am concerned that she may not actually be jelqing you with enough force to produce results.

You can gain from just wet or dry jelqs. I would suggest that you throw some stretches and kegels in there as well; they will all help, and don’t require any special equipment.

Thank you or the reply.

I do try to talk, harder/softer when she does it.

Kegels, I hear this alot and did a Google search, please enlighten me as to what this is?

Can you suggest a good stretch please, I do look on the forum search but it’s hard to gather from peoples different experiences as to what would work best for me.

Thank you

START HERE ——-> NEWBIE ROUTINE <——- Important Newbie Threads/Info

Thanks for the info. Agave had a look through and currently me & the missus are doing the newbie routine still.

She thinks I have gained girth but I can’t see it.

Maybe she is just trying to make me feel good.

I don’t really want to do anything other than manual techniques, I’m not so ‘into’ the idea of using hardware on myself.

I still can’t find what kegels are, I have looked around.am I missing something really obvious or have I not clicked somewhere(please don’t flame me)

Craig

While PE tech is nice and all, and something I recommend for all of humanity, more or less, I’m not sure it’s exactly what you need. Don’t get me wrong: PE, goddammit - Especially kegels.

But if you’re conscious enough about your penis that you have a hard time getting it to do the job, the problem probably isn’t the size. Especially not with what you think you have: 5 inches girth is way over on the biggish side (There’s a thread on it over here), and 6 in long is actually fairly large too. You really should measure, by the way, otherwise you will never know if you’ve had gains.

The way I see it your penis has been subjected to two kinds of abuse: Previous girls and you.

First: The girls who said your dick wasn’t very big were living, breathing, walking, talking fucking assholes. You need to see that - That if they said that they probably wanted to make you feel bad, and it wouldn’t have mattered if your cock was ten feet long. So that’s them abusing you.

The other abuse - You - is you doubting your girlfriend. And this is the kind I’m the most sick of: You can never ever truly know what someone else thinks. ALL you can do is trust them and what they say. But because you can’t ever know if what they say is true - Here’s the kicker - you have to CHOOSE to believe them. That’s right: YOU have to make a CHOICE.*

Does that make you vulnerable for heart break? Sure, but the opposite is walking around suspecting everyone, and to be honest never truly loving anyone. Because love requires respect, and respect means trust.

So, in essence, I’m saying that you’re choosing to think that she thinks that your cock is small - Or in essence you’re choosing to think your cock is small. And why would you do that? It’s the simplest thing in the world to set straight: Just fucking measure it. Even then you will just have to trust your girlfriend when she says it’s big enough for HER.

Fuck, this is all making me pissed off! Think your dick is the smallest ever if you want, but CHOOSE to trust your girlfriend, or your ego’s going to be the biggest dick in the universe.

(I’m sorry if you happened to get in the way of my rant - Think of it as me caring. But you really should measure, because hard facts are your best friends in PE. And if you find you’re 6x5 in: That’s big, trust me. If you’re not 6x5, well, you’ve got something to aim for.)

* That’s my general theory on love, and I’ve found nothing to think it faulty. It does strike me as a very christian way to look at things (Grace vis-à-vis faith, and so on), which is curious. Because I’m a staunch atheist, and always have been.

OK, I need to learn to do links in this here forum.

Also, I didn’t mean to dissuade you from PE. Hope that got through.

For me at least, jelqing would only make way nicer and vein-ier erections, and maybe make the girth a tad bigger. The real gains come from stretching, for which you do not necessarily need an actual device, just your hands. Try that for a few months.

She’s ‘REALLY’ thinking that she wishes you would be confident enough in yourself to give her a good hard banging! Seriously though, so many men think women are thinking about their size when that’s usually the last thing on their mind. She’s most likely thinking about how she’s happy to be with you, she’s happy you dig her and she’s happy she’s getting laid.

I also encourage you to PE and make the most of it for yourself. However, I heartily disagree with having her jelq you. I think this is something you need to do yourself to see any benefit. Let her jelq you for fun but don’t think for a moment that it will contribute to any gains.

Ditto.

Thanks for the replies - I kinda had a feeling I would get the replies along the lines of ‘it’s basically me’.

I must admit without going on a downer here, I’m pretty self conscious and everything but everything worries me.

I see and understand what bullet hell is saying, I just find it hard to apply it in real life - theory’s are always better than practical.theory’s always work!

Thanks for the advise any ways from all who replied.

That’s something you have to learn to deal with in your life. You don’t have to worry that much, you really don’t have to.

Yeah, your right. Easier aid than done unfortunately :(

Could someone please explain what kegels are, I still can’t figure it out - I have searched.am I searching in the wrong place?

Thanks

Well, actually they don’t. If they work in practice they can be quite valuable, though. That’s key: Practice. You probably won’t just wake up one day and trust her, but you can make yourself. Try this: Every time you find yourself doubting her, just tell yourself that you’re not going to. Acknowledge the doubt, but explain to yourself it’s unfounded and stupid, and it’s not the way you’re moving forward. If no one’s around, say it out loud, maybe even in front if a mirror. It might sound strange, but try it out for a month. If you find it does absolutely nothing for you, find another tool. Thing is, the brain, and thought patterns are much more malleable than people think.

On that note I would highly recommend you see a therapist. You should have publicly funded, good therapy in the UK. I don’t know that you do, but why not? Some mental issues, like self doubt, might be too heavy to handle on your own, so talking to a professional could help you find a way out. Oh, I know, you’re a big tough man, and you don’t need no stinkin’ therapy. That’s what my uncle thought too, until he put a rifle to his mouth, and now it’s too late. Therapy sure beats that, right?

Naw, I won’t scare you to therapy, but look at it like this: Everybody should go to therapy at least twice a year. Like a check-up, like something you would take your car to, and why would you treat your psyche worse than your car? I go to therapy, and while I’m not exactly normal, many of my well adjusted manly man friends do, and they love it. Just make sure they actually give you therapy, and not just drugs.

Oh, and kegels: When you pee (Sit down, just to avoid splashing), try stopping the flow mid river, so to speak. Try it a couple of times. You’ve essentially done a kegel or two. Now try doing the exact same thing (Minus the pee) when you’re reading this in front of the computer, or on the bus, or cooking that candlelight dinner your girlfriend deserves so. Rinse and repeat times a hundred, or so, every day or every other day, or whatever floats your boat.

Another way of finding the same muscles is when you have a hard on, do that thing with your pelvic floor, that makes your dick jump a little. Same muscles. The tricky part is then trying to “refine” the kegel - IE trying to make sure you don’t clamp your stomach muscles, or your buttocks when you kegel. But that gets better with time.

And mix it up over time. Do more, hold for longer, whatever. They’re so good, because they’re invisible to the observer, so you can do them wherever, and the health benefits are enormous.

Actually, if you want your girlfriend in on this too (And maybe instead of the jelqs?), ask her to kegel also. She can’t do yours for you, but the health benefits aside: She’s going to orgasm easier and harder, which (Let’s face it) benefit both of you.