Reflections and Progress: thoughtfulgold

@aboveallothers

Not trying to speak for TG but it seems like you basically immediately did what he said he wasn’t a huge fan of by projecting your goals and views onto him

I don’t agree. I asked questions about the reasons for his goals. We all have motivations behind our goals. I’m interested in his, which is why I asked if he would be comfortable stating them. I’m very much interested in the reason. That’s why I asked. I feel that everyone should be free to pursue their goals. He has one, and since he has gotten such great results, I’m interested to understand his reasoning, in case there is something to learn from him. I’ve learned a tremendous amount from him already.

I’m glad you answered my question respectfully, as usual. Thank you for your insights. As far as I’m concerned, I would love to see you have more fun with what you have already achieved. When I reached some bodybuilding goals, years ago, I didn’t enjoy them because they magic was really just pure hard work, and I knew what went into me losing weight, with many people asking how I’d done it. I still had many goals to accomplish so I was focused on those goals, in bodybuilding, which I’m still getting to. I can understand how you have some goals that are hard for us “normies” to relate to. This is why I asked the question, to understand your mentality. And I’m glad that I did because of the meticulous detail and thought-process that you outlined. I hope to replicate your results in a faster time because I think that would be the greatest testament to the tremendous value of your posts. At least that’s my goal. I hope I succeed in doing so, or at least someone else does.

I am a big believer in turning what is in our minds into our realities. I would actually love to write more things on that subject, in posts, and in messages. This is why from now on, I’m focused on getting some measured results, which will require more focus, and hard work on my PE. I’m doing what I need to. It’s really a matter of time and effort.

Good luck with all your goals. You’re helping me achieve something that could change a lot about how I approach many things when it comes to size, and the kind of sex I will be able to have since my priority is to be able to fuck size queens who have rigorous stated size needs. I already have the bodybuilding solved. Reaching my penis size goals/EQ/ejac-control/refractory time improvement would be a giant cherry on top of that.

You’re an extremely interesting and likable presence. IMO it’s easy to underestimate how that is foundational, to which all the rest is built.

I find a lot of the current crop of users are more businesslike and selfish than the users of yesteryear. Reading ancient threads you will read about much more comradery, more displays of personality, and an overall greater sense of humanity and solidarity between users of Thunder’s Place back then compared to now.

I haven’t really (with select exception) made friends here that talk about much more than PE. Most of the people that I converse with are looking for the “Grail” and see me as a large part of that journey, if not the end of the journey and the “Grail” itself. These things don’t surprise me.

My issue only arises when they insist I’m some sort of “PE Rosetta Stone” and that I hold the keys to their success and “you have to help meee because…” and fill in the blank with desperation, depression, confidence seeking and trying to turn ones life around.

Those things made me stop coaching guys in Personal Messages. I used to evaluate routines and check on people. Hell, I used to write custom routines that people loved. It ate up my time and kept my inbox buzzing. I could not keep it up.

I decline now, when people ask. It’s not something I will do unless paid to do so anymore. It is not fair to me nor does it respect my time.

I am glad you find me interesting and likable, Buckfever. I try to be as much like I actually am as possible. I’m just a regular guy, or so I like to think.

The information you’ve provided on the forum is more than enough for any intelligent user to glean all the necessary information they need. Any fanboy worship or desperations is really just symptomatic of people on the Internet looking for people to worship, and personally interact with because they have achieved what they strive to achieve themselves but probably lack the ability to just put in the work for a long time. People will always worship successful online poker players, successful chess players, videogame players, bodybuilders, programmers, money-makers, and now people who get great results from PE.

It’s the nature of parasites to live vicariously through their idol who feeds their fantasies. This is why celebrities say that celebrity is not all it’s cracked up to be. There’s bad with the good if you choose to actually take people’s feelings seriously. I feel that there is a balance that can be struck, while getting great results, being a popular active poster while being selfish to an appropriately healthy degree that protects you from feeling like you owe anyone anything. You definitely don’t owe anyone anything. Game Theory dictates that there is almost always an ideal optimal balance in any scenario.

I fully understand this aspect of human nature. At one point I was one, or close to it. It took realizing idolizing someone would never make me into them to become my own success. That does not make these men less than human or interacting with them less draining. The good in me hurts when i have to leave messages unreplied to because they expect me to create a miracle since they went through all the trouble to sign up just to message me without even making a single post on the forum.

I know I owe no one anything. However, I accepted a mission of giving what I can and it comes with its own downsides. I strike a balance as best I can. It does mean being much less active than I was at first and limiting my posts to things that need my attention or things I feel I have something especially constructive to offer.

Google “cock sock” and then this entry has context.

I bumbled into this looking for a way to protect my glans after a burn but grew to like the “cock sock” unexpectedly. It being 15 degrees on average lately has to have had an influence on this opinion.

So I got to thinking about incorporating it into my life. Immediately, cuz it’s “not normal” I think it’s absurd or comical. But really, that’s just me adhering to social norms I have no use for. My dick might be cold, I may put a sock on it. That’s my choice.

But it took my best friend, a lady who only saw my interest in cock socks as practical, asking “what’s the issue if no one sees it?” for me to realize exactly what my “problem” with a cock sock was.

We unknowingly adhere to standards set by society sometimes. Honestly, you just saw all the cock socks for sale. This is a thing. I pretended it wasn’t. Or that I was weird or wrong for enjoying it when the market for them is alive and growing.

Don’t be ashamed to be yourself. And if you’re cold, maybe you need a cock sock. They work.

As far as being ashamed goes, I feel that people should try more often to put themselves in situations where they have to deal with fear and pressure, so that they become more comfortable with it, and realize that they should not let people dictate their life choices. Unfortunately, in this age of social media, I feel that people tend to cater towards their bases, family, friends, and social networks, in real life and the Internet, and allow people to dictate their choices to a large degree.

It is nearly impossible not to allow people to influence your choices to some degree. My personal chosen solution, for my life, is to choose friends and a social network who are very independent, free-thinking, and libertarian so that they don’t judge me for my choices, and I don’t judge them for their choices. This tends to foster positive relationships with a smaller, but much higher quality group of friends, making my social network more desirable.

I tend not to associate with overly political/religious/homophobic/judgmental/passive people. I find extremists, specifically people who overdo in those categories, to be very tedious, and I don’t interact with them. Their negative energy can be corrosive. I don’t view myself as being hypocritically judgmental of them. I view it as just me being proactive to improve the quality of people in my life and social network, focusing on people that don’t stunt the positive choices that I desire to make. People who make you afraid to do something that you think is positive, are not helpful in the long run.

Also, now that you answered my question on your goals so eloquently and meticulously, I am rooting hard for you to reach your size goals. It will be great to see if PE success is truly essentially limited only by imagination and willpower. To that I also ask, don’t you think 10x8 has a better ring to it? :)

We would all love to see you not only accomplish your dream but to go as far as your desire and willpower can take you. I’m definitely rooting for you.

I have always marched to the beat of my own Drum. I was never an innovator or leader when given the choice (though I perform both roles well) as I identify more as a sigma male than an alpha. The defining traits in my character make it reprehensible for other people’s opinions to affect me in a deep way that isn’t also somewhat profitable or beneficial to myself. As long as I keep that in mind I function well and fine. I had a little bit of the trepidation before I came to the conclusion that not only are cock socks functional and worthwhile for me but they are a luxury that I can afford due the size of my flaccid penis. There is no reason for me to feel awkward or like it is an absurd notion just because no one else I know can consider it as a viable option.

The exact goal that I printed is considered 5x the average size in a typical distribution pattern. And, for sensationalism sake in my own mind, it is a worthwhile and absolutely amazing, reality bending to my will sort of end goal.

As you have assessed, the goal is simply to push what is possible with sheer force of will. After I am satisfied with what I find I will decide exactly what size I do want.

I appreciate your support.

A key element to good PE is good, solid measurements if enlargement is your primary goal. Normally failing measurements are based on inconsistent techniques. Subconsciously edging up the numbers.

However (and this i thought I would be able to detect if it happened) a stretched measuring tape represents a catastrophic failure point.

The entire system is predicated on having some baseline to continue to compare against. The goalposts moving as I got bigger provided negative feedback on technique that could have been wildly successful. It begs the question of, back in the summer when I was doing heavy IPR PE and hit 6.375” MSEG, was it 6.5”?

If so, it would have affected the path I took and perhaps I wouldn’t have changed my priority to PE4F so soon. I do not regret taking this path, but I would have run my routine then a cycle or2 longer and came back to PE before the start of the New Year to do so.

How am I affected knowing I’ve seen a .25” MSEG gain in what I can only call 17 months due to an inability to know *when the tape failed*?

Still fucking awesome.

It puts me at 8.125x6.125” NBPEL. It says my girth theories and reading of my Physiological Indicators is on point. It means that the path I’m on is the path of victory. And it means that beyond all shadow of a doubt.

Your measuring tool is important and stressing this is not often done other than the usage of the ruler. Periodically check on your measurement tools. Is a prudent measure considering how very small denominations like 1/8 of an inch are the difference between success and failure.

**Picture below

I really wish there were GOOD ways to measure. I work with engineering so to me that “very small 1/8th of an inch” is a massive amount! :)

Coming up with equipment and systems for accurate measurement is going to be a big part of the coming PE revolution. We are still using things like rulers and tape measures from the dark ages.

As a pump-only guy, eventually I stopped most manual measurement, and settled on pumped measurements. I get a good idea of girth gains by girth in tube at pressure, and tube packing times at pressure. Then similar for pumped length at pressure and time. Throw in some experience for allowing for flesh changes (temperature, pre-stretch, base skin issues, any temporary toughness etc) then it’s possible to get a close idea of gains over time. These days I get X gains per month, on schedule, no deviation. But day to day variances are still large.

I wish it was as easy as just pumping for a minute at 5inHg etc, then read out the pumped length. But it’s going to take some smart people some years I think, to come up with really good measuring techniques and equipment.

As I wait for my glans burn to heal it becomes more and more apparent one of my greatest tools that I haven’t truly touched on in any of my posts. This tool is natural and cannot be provoked. The backside of this tool also is natural and can I be provoked however you can follow a path that will be conducive to its creation.

What I am talking about is the natural production of the emotion of “excitement” regarding PE and your progression in it.

My PE4F project has me very, very motivated. I can’t wait to experiment more with it. I feel like games are just around the corner. Just the other day I found out that I get a free 1/8” just because the measuring tape had stretched. All of these things mount to create a very exciting and happy environment inside of my mind that is conducive to further PE. Which is key considering how long I’ve been at this.

For me, since PE is a lifestyle choice, having something that shows promise in my routine actively brightens my entire demeanor. The fact is that the longer you do PE the more it affects you overall. I talked about this in other posts where your time management can affect your leisure time and activities, how you are moods based on routines that were successful or not successful can bleed over into your actual life and those things need be considered but there’s one good thing about it it isn’t really spoken on.

PE is still technically a quest and a series of achievements. These things generate emotions inside of you much like any other series of achievements that you can undertake. So when you feel especially motivated or happy, like when you can’t wait to get to the gym or dojo, your sessions are better. When you know something is going well you want to do more of it regardless of what it is. So, while your mood being dictated by your sessions is not good, the excitement you feel undertaking the endeavor is important.

It is a thin line to draw. Perhaps too thin or not contrasted enough. I will speak on the other side of that line here briefly.

Do not let PE consume your life. I have said this more than once but when it consumes your waking thoughts it doesn’t help and it magnifies any failures you do experience. Additionally when it consumes your waking thoughts whatever gains you experience will never feel like enough compared to the effort and mental energy you are expending to achieve them. When your thoughts are dominated by that desperation to create and achieve it will seem like excitement at first but will soon after demolished your moral and ruin your focus on other tasks. This is common to any particular thing that takes a lot of devotion and time but I will use PE as the example as you can’t talk about it with most of the people you interact with. It being an unrelatable topic compounds the frustration you will feel. That is one of the things that makes it incredibly toxic to your mental state. A lot of the personal messages that I get are rife with desperation and I can’t change that because that is inside of your mind and no matter what I reply to you it will not go away until you are ready for it to.

Balance your excitement with a desire to maintain your life. Then the limited time that you set aside for PE will be more productive and exciting. Vital tools for the longevity of your PE career.

Many moons ago when I set my PE goals after officially having made some games I looked to Shane Diesel and Mandingo. Many years passed, the exact measurements of both actors remain a mystery. Until relatively recently.

I found a picture that gives proper perspective to Mandingo’s actual length. He has been marketed up to 14” but obviously that is simply not the case. I’m not going to go into porn camera angles and how to trick the human eye. What I will say is that 9.5” is his Non-Bone Pressed Erect Length when compared against a Barbie doll with a known height. But that isn’t very important right now. Today we are talking about my girth goals and how Shane Diesel influenced them from the beginning.

I never truly understood exactly what girth meant. It took years of PE and significant girth gains before I understood that girth was both a blessing and a curse. I naturally assumed that Shane Diesel girth was over 7 inches more like 7.5”. This was demoralising ultimately but it did not stop me from chasing said goal. As my mid-shaft exploits continue I have been up to 6.375” and back down to 6.125”. However, it would appear that Shane Diesel girth has been recorded because he sells a molded dildo. The girth of the dildo is 6.5 inches.

That measurement is much closer to my current girth then I actually knew. My base girth is significantly larger than that. It only goes to show exactly how damaging funky camera angles and tiny women can be.

A user here mentioned his girth as being recorded at 6.5” and I kind of glanced over it at first. It didn’t seem to be relevant. I had in my mind and image of Shane Diesel and mentally that information did not disturb it at all. Almost a week later, today, I looked into it myself and observed the video where Shane endorses the dildo and many other reviews of the dildo that clearly showcase insertable length and the girth of the dildo. The video erroneously actually lists the girth of the dildo at 5.5 inches. This is clearly wrong. However 6.5” is not a world away.

It is also much closer to my own size then I had ever expected it to be. Additionally, with an insertable length of 7.5” I am significantly longer than Shane Diesel, since I’m 8.125” Non Bone Pressed Length at this time. His length has been marketed at 10” for years.

It places me in a new head space. Where I have to grasp the idea that I am doubtlessly on the path to becoming larger than extremely large porn stars. Because I know what I want to do and I know what minimum measurements that I want to see and the measurements that Shane Diesel has are not those measurements. And that is a very funny thing to say or feel and admit to. Not strange here on this forum but strange compared to the penis size in real life where the egos of men shatter on the surface of computer screens daily.

Sometimes people will mention that my size is monstrous when responding to my comments. There is nothing I can really add to any of those statements but I never really felt those statements were accurate either. Looking at the numbers now, I have to embrace that. Because the fact of the matter is no matter how much I pretend otherwise… I am moving past my goal post. I am going into a place beyond where I originally imagined I could ever go.

I live in a world where my goals are accomplished and I can reach them with force of will and enough time. Living in this world I have to acknowledge that my goals will all eventually be met and exceeded and that my original mindset when I created them will have also changed by the time I reach them.

I can’t place people on pedestals that I have already overtaken. The pedestals that existed when those goals were created erode with a passage of time and my accomplishments.

Saying that I will exceed Shane Diesel’s girth and Mandingo’s length doesn’t sound so impossible anymore. It simply sounds like time spent reaching a goal.

I simply have to keep my perspective in a relevant place. I’m not the same person who created those goals nor is my body the same as the person who created those goals at that time.