Reflections and Progress: thoughtfulgold

Are you sure many weeks of healing? Even for what was mostly a first degree burn that never blistered?

Also, gotta ask this…healing to be pump ready is one thing. Would I be ready for sex any sooner than projected recovery time for high pressure pumping? I’m assuming a vagina isn’t as high risk as 28Hg in that question.

Because, somehow, I got a date coming up…

I’m back to sock when I sleep and sleeping with penis between my thighs. Is this a reasonable method to raise temp?

Ah I see. Well thats okay. More fuel for the fire. Thanks for the correction, with so much skewed perception in this arena, the truth is extremely valuable.

Also, while I have you here, thanks for being a resource for PE and general mens mental health. I think your contributions in both categories here are incredibly valuable.

If my words are of use to you and assist you in your journey then part of my job is done. I am here to help just like I am here to complete my own PE journey.

Thank you for the kind words, sir.

I have a date today that I reasonably believe will lead to sex down the line. So naturally the new partner jitters comes up.

Problem with my size is double-edged. My ego, against my better judgement, wants validation for the size of my penis. My brain warns that a partner shorter than 5’ may have a LOT of trouble with my size. Then, the insecure boy of over 10 years ago fears the feel of the loose slop sort of vagina that took my virginity. This fear is usually allayed after a session in bed with someone but…then she isn’t quite as new after that.

I can cope with not being the biggest someone has had. That, I am equipped to handle. But some form of awe, even slight, is somewhat expected. I suppose part of me hasn’t matured enough but…given the sort of gal she is and the glans burn status, sex is a ways away.

Just idle musings. This one is smart and independent. I’m quite happy with her thus far. I’ll make notes later if anything notable related to PE occurs.

Even at the size I have attained, getting naked that first time with someone weighs on my mind. Still.

I think the “many weeks of healing” is for FULL strength of the newly formed tissues. I believe it just gets stronger over time, until eventually reaches normal strength. My point was that you can’t bank on it being full strength just because it looks like new flesh has grown over and it looks normal enough. :)

Like you said, sex should be a lot less force than high vacuum pumping! I suppose if it has healed to the point where a rough masturbation session doesn’t worsen it, then sex is probably ok? It was only a couple days back you mentioned that hard erections might be interfering with healing.

Re the heat pack etc, I had a nasty frenulum tear from getting too big too quick (long story) and a gentle heat rice sock while relaxing, watching TV etc definitely seemed to speed healing in the cold weather. But in a warm cosy bed and cock sock sounds warm enough for sleep.

Good luck on your date! Don’t worry so much, if she’s into you (most likely!) then it should be ok.
And when the time comes for the “reveal” just be a bit humble; “One girl told me I’m a BIT bigger than average” and then she will be “WOW! That’s a MONSTER!”.
That’s much better than telling her it’s a monster, and maybe risking getting a weird look at the reveal. ;)

This is news I wanted to hear, that I suspected. I may be a month or two out for the pumping but sex, hopefully within the next week or two. Don’t want to make her wait after we get started. I want to get back to PE…but that can wait. Assuredly.

You never tell them it’s a monster. Always be humble. But, sometimes, you are humble and they shrug. That is bothersome. It is also emphasizes exactly how much size matters to many women. As men we don’t tend to accept this very well.

The meeting turned into a date. The date has turned into almost steamy texting. She wants me to say dirty things and has made clear she wants to be taken and offers no resistance to me getting her clothes off. We chatted a bit, we think a lot alike. She and I just vibe and she wants to feel me.

However, she’s less than 5’ and only dated white guys (in divorce proceedings now) and usually chubby girls with that history attract non alpha or not hung guys cuz…they are too nice for their own good. It’s my own opinion and assessment. She also hasn’t had sex for almost a year.

All factors to how well we will fit together. I’m eager to try and so is she but…i still ache a bit if I get too erect. Gotta wait another week or so. Skin is unbroken, smooth but a bit dry. I’m still bandage/burn gel but letting it air more.

I’ll just tell her I have a burn, please her in other ways. Figure something out.

Do you think she attracts non alphas or is she choosing non alphas? What is an alpha in this context?

Realistically? Alphas are men with drive who lead and accomplish what they set forth. Rather than lazy wannabes (betas and gammas) who follow and support Alphas while settlling for mediocrity in careers, possessions and partners. These men always look for the most tortured or nice girl they can convince to fuck them and these women, with track records of losers in essence accept this thinking this is all they can attract or deserve.

I’ve seen this bear out in many women I’ve dated and fucked.

I had sex with a short, fat girl. And it was unlike anything I ever did. Not physically. But mentally. Because she kind of forced me to tell her I was hung before sex. It’s a funny story.

We had been talking all evening and she was playing coy, talking about condoms. I made clear what she had wasn’t going to work. So she said "Well, I have magnums…" in a ‘I got condoms for a reason’ way. I roll my eyes pointedly. She says "Oh really?"

So I tell her to get out a magnum condom, that I have something to show her. I go to my coat and bring back a condom, Theyfit G31. I set it on the bed next to her freshly fished from the stash Magnum bareskin. She blanched looking at the package difference and I told her to open them. She had an eye bug out moment comparing them directly. Just looked at me weird for a few moments.

I told her to Google the condom. Which if you do, the website wrote a separate blurb on "the biggest condom in the world" that comes up here: myONE (Previously TheyFit) - The World’s Largest Condom – myONE® Perfect Fit

She read that, gulped then produces a Pringles can and tries to mouth it before considering putting the condom on it. I tell her I’m not quite that big but its clear she’s intrigued and now distressed, as she has fisted the condom for shits and giggles and now has blanched again.

We start doing the do. She also has a small mouth, as in only 24 teeth small. So she’s nipping me orally, she can’t throat me at all. She valiantly forces herself to try multiple times. I’m the first guy that she couldn’t throat. I kind of expected that. Her frustration and surprise was evident.

So we decide to go penetrate. I find her hole and test with my finger. Natural resting state there is no way it won’t be mad friction. I’m worried for my burn, trying to wedge my way in and obvious tearing risk so I go get the lube I brought. She accuses me of being prepared, cuz she wasn’t planning on sex originally (they all say that the first time). I ask "Would it make sense if I wasn’t?" She concurs and even fully lubed is snug. Remains so. Like, feels really good snug even covered in lube.

She can only get me in about 6.5" before her massive ass stops me, as we opted for doggy first. But, when I start fucking her hard, like she asked, after about 10 thrusts she was begging "not so deep" and would only thrust back for half of my cock. I wasn’t fully hard either, about a 7.5/10 which is normal with a new partner. I find the more I’m with someone the harder erections they get from me.

I got her to orgasm from doggy. Played around more before resting. She comments on her initial reactions and, even though I warned her about my size she admits there was a chance she would have turned me away without a full disclosure. I tell her she’s the first one I’ve warned in years. Cuz warning a woman gets you scoffed at. Her face went serious before she told me that the warning was one of the only reasons she kept on with trying sex with me.

She tossed a few more ego strokes before admitting I redefined size for her. She was still in awe cuz of the condom difference.

Afterwards, she’s much more respectful. I’m not fishing for ego strokes but she’s ladling them out. I check my burn, which is find but dry, and mention my cock sock and she wants to roll her eyes then looks back at me, makes her serious face and agrees it makes sense. She admits, cuz I’m black and her first black guy she expected me to be bigger than her biggest but not that much larger. She wasn’t prepared for that.

Her reactions were comical, easily the most detailed even though I warned her beforehand. I did not predict it. The sex was also amazing. As even though she only can fit half in her mouth, her oral technique is both unique, consciously easy on my burn and just fucking good. Our vaginal fit, combined with her porn caliber giant ass, is a good match for me mostly. She is as deep as an average woman (making her very deep for her height), though it’s likely due to a known upward pelvic tilt that made it easier to hit deep inside her. This lets me thrust deep with ease and she can withstand it well, due to her natural big butt buffer.

The sex went well. No additional injuries to report. Vaginal friction does no harm but I won’t be seeing her for a few days. Maybe absconding from sex for another 4 days or so, just to give the burn more time to heal (even though I’ll be visiting to watch TV in 2 days). Breaking the ice and getting an idea how sex will be is accomplished so the imperative is not as pressing now. I was more than satisfied.

*She did bleed some the next morning, as she advised.

Sounds like an overall good experience for both of you. Thanks for sharing.

Just wondering, was she at all freaked out by the bleeding?

No, because there was no pain. She is clearly scared to be torn during sex and bleed in any serious way but does understand the risk.

That’s good that there was no pain and she understands that precautions will have to be taken. Just make sure she’s thoroughly warmed up before going in, and, like you said, lots of lube.

None of this is new or news to me. I preach caution and care. I try to practice it, for what it’s worth. Usually.

That said, I need to add that I was probably 7or 7.5” NBP and in 5.75” range for girth for the encounter due to less than perfect EQ. That induced comically amazed reactions. A series of them.

Guys need to take note that the goals we set are huge. Massive and absolutely incredible for most women. It staggers me that men do not see this. But we don’t see this. Ever. *sighs*

I realized after reading my post back that I was preaching to the choir, as it were. Didn’t mean to come off as preachy.

Best of luck with this new lady TG