Reflections and Progress: thoughtfulgold

This thread is excellent TG, full of important things that you have shared in every way, thanks for doing it and congratulations for your 9 years and 5,000 postings!!!

Thank you very much! I am glad I can leave something for the community!

It was posed to me by one of my new female best friends, M, that I apologize too much.

She supports my PE endeavors in her own way, because of the self-discovery and the effort and mental discipline it has given me. But she doesn’t like big penises, and definitely thinks my penis looks disproportionate, like a toddler’s leg. But this is her subjective opinion. She wants me to be happy and grow and love myself and she loves that I’m doing that and finding that with PE and exercise.

This brings me to the point of this particular post. I have been reflexively apologetic about the fact that I do PE. I know I am ashamed of it. We hide what it is that we do as though it is illegitimate or wrong. Most of us will be mortified if our significant others found out without us telling them.

This is wrong. We have no reason to be ashamed. What it is that we do is noteworthy in laudable. It is no cause for us to be guilty about. Yet one of the main things that I can think of that made me guilty is how I didn’t want anyone to find out because it would make me feel as though having made my penis bigger I wasn’t a legitimate “big guy” because I had to work at it. As though the fact that I made my penis bigger somehow takes away from the value of the size I created. Because social validation if you admit some kind of weakness changes in context intent and so we just hide it and try to play it off instead.

All of this is terrible. There is absolutely no reason that us getting bigger is anything bad. And yet, so many of us when we do breach the topic to our loved ones, end up with our feelings hurt and tip toeing as though walking on glass hoping that they’ll approve. This has to stop. This mindset has to end.

There is no part of self-improvement that requires any apologies and it’s not supposed to by Design. For us to feel guilty or ashamed about self-improvement is actually a step backwards from actually truly appreciating ourselves and then continuing of ourselves in a cohesive and meaningful way. How can I become a better version of myself if I’m ashamed of what I do to become a better version of myself?

The answer is I cannot. It is its own catch-22 and it cannot be negotiated. At some point you have to confront this and change the way you see what it is that you do. We talk like we are proud of what we do but we do it in Shadow. How proud can we be?

No More Apologies.

Hello,
i get what you’re saying and i agree to a great extent but there are some social constants that no matter if they are good or bad…they’re undeniably there and so one should be ready to deal with the consequences of ignoring them.

Should you be ashamed for doing PE exercises? Of course not. A natural big dick vs a hard earned one IS cooler though. Maybe there are evolutionary reasons involved, who knows. They say’ try hard enough so that it appears like you are not’. Trying to elongate your dick is pretty deep in the try-hard set. I don’t think it’s a matter of feeling guilty or ashamed towards the others, it’s a matter of how people are wired to respond to things. And people ARE wired to respond negatively to the IMAGE of someone trying too hard.

So even if we’re ok with doing it, even maybe to the point that we talk about it with a few close friends, imo it would unwise to expect any good to come out of being too open about it.

This thinking is the core of the problem. Simple as that.

Feel free to feel as you like, but if you believe this you don’t get what I’m saying. You simply read it.

People will definately dislike a person who “plays” with his penis “n” hours/day, doesn t matter for what purpose, but especially for enlargement purposes, people will hate you for that reason..even if they re interested in the subject as much/at least as much as you are

I think we can agree, if that question was asked to 10,000 random people at least 8,000 of them would say the same. It just happens that my personal opinion converges with the general. Yours maybe doesn’t.

edit: Dude, why do you define it as a problem? Is it a problem that between jennifer lawrence and amy schumer the former would be chosen 95% of the times for a sexy lead role?

I am not confused about the general opinion of this topic. The fact you subscribe to it is simply something I don’t agree with and no amount of justification makes it make sense or makes it into a palatable situation. If “trying hard” makes me lamer than someone who hit the genetic lottery I don’t see anything positive about following the social norm. I do not need you to explain how said toxic social norm works.

This is apples and eye bolts. The contexts are wildly different, completely unrelated and a comparison of women rather than men. The question is moot.

I stated why I think It’s a problem in the first post you replied to. You can disagree, we don’t need to come to a mutual conclusion.

Everyone’s hobby is dumb. That’s the realization my dad had after teasing me a little too hard one day. (It wasn’t malicious.)

Dad likes to play with little trains on a track to nowhere. I like to pretend to be a wizard by rolling funny dice. These are both manifestly silly things to do—and that’s okay! Even the most practical and popular hobby—like cooking or sports—has countless people who can’t imagine why anyone would want to waste their time that way.

Sure, it’s alright. I’m not trying to convince you or anything.
Do you think that in the future the social norm or the general perception of people will change regarding this?

TG, your post 963 is deeply refreshing to me. Thank you!

I am glad you enjoyed it.

It won’t change till we stop hiding. As long as we conduct ourselves as though we deserve shame, we will be ashamed.

No telling when that will change.

My issue isn’t the view of the hobby itself. I doubt that the view of the hobby will ever change. It is the mindset of why we do the hobby versus the fact that performing the hobby is terrible.

While people can agree or argue that martial arts is a lame way to spend one’s time no one argues that the benefits exist. In the case of PE both the hobby and the benefits are seen in a poor light. The benefits are question and, assuming that the benefits can be convinced to exist by the outside observer, the benefits are seen as a manifestation of insecurity and ridiculousness.

It is the duality of shame and guilt that make it extremely hard to ever mention this to anyone.

Hey TG, did you really only have 4.3 girth? If so the increase you made is increadible, and very inspiring to me