Buckfever's General Progress Log

10/16/2024

1.73"X9" straight tube

5 minutes @ 3.5 hg
2 minute rest
5 minutes @ 3.5 hg
2 minute rest
5 minutes @ 3.5 hg

Tube down length position: 6-3/4+"
Pack: 3+"

Length was a little more but not quite to the next notch, a little more packing. I view this as a period of consolidation.

Weight: 176.6 @ 17.9% Bodyfat

Weather turned cold so activity level on the work days is down. Will make up for it today. Sticking with the slightly reduced meal plan. Not sure how well that brightener is working, I’m going to give it 2 more weeks and may go back to the other.

Work is a grinder now, our operation remains only slightly down while all my colleagues and business partners report substantial slowing, I think we’re going to have a recession. I reduced staffing very slightly. Inventory levels are good, and there is a lot of discounting.

Time to batten down the hatches.

Not sure what is going on with the girl, the affect is still there but reduced, I am seeing her Saturday for take out. I’ll know once the affect is gone. We’ll see if she fills the gap. You want me to move an inch, it’ll cost you a mile.

It is what it is.

Election years have mostly been bad for business since the turn of the 21st century. Tightening things up to ride through the rough spots is only reasonable.

Don’t wait for her to figure it out. Just tell her. If she leaves, you can start looking for a replacement immediately instead of being unhappy about it for weeks/months/etc.

I don’t want to sound like a misogynist, but this will not be solved rationally. And I don’t want to say what I really think.

Despite decades of propaganda, no, women *don’t* think like men. Both culture and biology affect that. They probably do call that misogyny nowadays, but denial of reality seems to be the ‘in’ thing nowadays.

So why are you still together? Habit?

10/17/2024

1.73"X9" straight tube

5 minutes @ 3 hg
2 minute rest
5 minutes @ 3 hg
2 minute rest
5 minutes @ 3 hg

Tube down length position: 6-7/8+"
Pack: 3+"

I’m calling 3 hg, 4 notches short of 5hg, it’s actually the halfway point.

Packing measure about the same but for sure a good bit more length even though the pressure was lowered.

I switched back to the Admire my skin whitener and the discoloration seemed improved so decided to lower the pressure to facilitate the lightening and to continue with the light conditioning that I perceive the tissues need.

Weight: 176 @ 17.9% bodyfat

Yesterday activity level: Archery 90 rounds, 10 flights on the Sledding hill with the weighted vest, walk 1X 1.3 miles.

I wanted to do more yesterday but I started shooting out at 40 yards, needed to do more work on that form and need to get back there tomorrow so I thought lifting would be too much. I should have walked more but I don’t like the cold. I’ll do more tomorrow. Pushed the pace on the hill, legs are getting stronger.

AndyJ said: "Just tell her" and I find his insights fascinating and maybe it’s adverse selection on my part, but I have never found such a girl. I don’t believe anything they say and I don’t fault them, for me it’s part of the allure, I just don’t think they know. So I don’t make decisions that way.

And not to sound ecclesiastical but something about the fruit that they bear.

10/17/2024

There’s redness on the glans again and I want to work on the discoloration so I’m going to take a break on the pump and just do the fast edge, work on the discoloration for now and give the tissues a good amount of time to heal.

Yeah, I suck as a relationship counselor.

The likelihood of her changing is negligibly small.

Telling her why you’re unhappy with her will probably make her break things off of her own volition, without the usual drama if you’re the one who calls an end to it. Then you’re free to look for a relationship you find more suitable.

10/18/2024

Fast Edge - Basically just bringing it to a sustained full blown erection and that’s it.

The product to lighten the darkening seems to be working although it does dry out the skin.

The product is Admire my skin brightening serum. It’s on Amazon, I’ve used it before and it works but it is a little harsh. Probably need to use some kind of moisturizer.

Weight: 175.4 @ 17.6% bodyfat

Yesterday activity level: Walk: 2 X 1.3 miles

Okay so the glans tissues are still beat up and need a more sustained time for healing. So I’ve decided to pause the use of the pump, to give it 4-6 weeks for healing now that I’ve sorted out the pumping tubes and the approach. It took a minute but I’m pretty confident that I have the path forward if I can just let the tissues heal fully, that we can readily realize the available expansion gains.

In the meantime I will take advantage of the lay off to work on the discoloration. Just using the product twice a day.

I’ve switched the protein to more of a Chicken breast and Fish focus which allows a higher amount of protein while keeping the calories down. With this reduced meal plan I am hungry sometimes so I just have vegetables or an apple to tie me over. We only have 3.75lbs of fat to go for the ultimate lean and then really just have to put on about 4 lbs of lost muscle and I’ll be where I want to be. That effort will start right after Thanksgiving, early December. That’s only about a 3-4 month campaign to get the muscle back. I want that look back.

Girl came around says she’ll be around for 3 days. She’s angry blew up a couple of times. I’m listening and I’m not escalating but I’m not giving anything either and I won’t.

I don’t think I have mainstream views on how men should conduct themselves. I think by the time I got to college it had just gotten too easy for me. I’d old now and I don’t have nearly the same response, but it still is kind of easy.

How this informs my views on relationships I will concede skews my view. But I’ve had relationships that were really bad and where I’ve tried to fill the gap and it does not fucking work. I see the world and the dynamics of the relationships around me and I’ve been in relationships where strong independent women will give themselves completely. I think that attraction is reptilian and the narratives of today do not work.

I don’t know what the path forward will bring but I can tell you I’m not going to be with a woman who doesn’t give herself completely. I’m of the opinion that men should insist on it.

Anyway given that I’m not going to approach for intimacy, I think the fast edging is really a good idea for penile health. I’ve noticed that when I’ve incorporated it the erection response is facilitated. I’m thinking that the system needs exercise and if we’re not as sexually active as we should be we need to do something to maintain it. Maybe I missed it but I’m surprised that the benefits of edging aren’t more out there in the mainstream.

Day off weather is good planning on a high level of activity.

10/18/2024

Fast Edge

Weight: 177.2 @ 18.1% bodyfat

Yesterday Activity level: Archery ~ 65 rounds. Walking 3 X 1.3 miles

Wound up not feeling great yesterday so wasn’t as active as I planned. Better today but not great. Will do more tomorrow.

The whitening product is really working great. And I figured out what was going on with the glans. This morning I noticed that patches of the glans were impacted similarly to what I had previously observed. So I believe what is happening is that some of the whitening product manages to get on the sensitive tissues of the glans and causes the injury. Maybe combining that with pumping makes it worse, but at least I know what the cause was.

I wanted to mention that morning hang is really profoundly enhanced with the pumping and so far continues to manifest. I wonder if others have found the same. I for sure and am a bit surprised that I appreciate the enhancement.

Yesterday the girl said I seem to be trying, which I find fascinating since my response has been to stop trying. Go figure. That’s a start, but there is a long, long way to go.

Hi Buck! Is the whitening product you use for the skin on your shaft? I have some darkening/discolouration on my shaft from all the clamping and edging - I was wondering if the stuff you’re using might work(?) 🤔

Yes on the shaft. It’s Admire My Skin brightening serum. I think it works by causing irritation. It’s somewhat harsh but it’s working really well.

Speaking of which after I applied it this morning I coated the glans with Silicone to see if that will provide protection.

Good to hear it’s working… I think I’ll give it a try 👍.

10/20/2024

Fast Edge

Yesterday activity level: Walking 2 X 1.3 miles

Feeling much better today so we will up the activity level. Did not get a weight today, for some reason she was still sleeping, she’s usually running on European time, but that’s good, I got to get my sleep pattern fixed before the time change. I need more sleep. Feeling pretty tight though.

I got to get on the hydration, I find I am waking early and thirsty. So will fill the pitcher of water this morning and make sure we polish it off.

Coating the glans with the silicone after applying the brightening serum to the shaft worked. Woke with no ill effects on the glans tissue. The discoloration on the shaft is improving steadily.

Very, very much looking forward to getting back in the gym full throttle early December. While its been frustrating that things have gotten in the way of making progress, I do feel I’m in striking distance.

10/21/2024

Fast Edge

Weight: 176.2 @ 17.7 %

Yesterday Activity Level: 20 flights on the sledding hill with the 40lb vest, Archery ~ 100 rounds, Walking 3X1.3 miles

Strong on the hill, much better on the archery.

Almost got through the pitcher of water so that’s a good strategy, to have that out and visible as a reminder.

The brightening serum has really lightened up the discoloration but at this point the shaft skin is really dry and chaffing so I’m going to give that a break and let the tissues exfoliate and rehydrate. I need a moisturizer.

On the morning walk with the girl yesterday she continued to unload on me, so basically I heard all her grievances regarding how much of an asshole I am. Towards the end of the walk I asked her if she’s just going to fight with me, why come on a walk with me? She said it was helpful for her to get it out. I told her that I am not denying much of what you say I just don’t agree with your interpretations and I have expectations too and I have a say regarding the nature of my relationships and I am not compromising. I asked her is there anything good or do you just see bad things? She said there’s good. I told her I don’t agree with you regarding the quality of the relationship and that on balance when I compare it to others I think it’s significantly better.

That seemed to disarm her. The rest of the day was pretty good.

Not sure where this goes, because I’ve stepped back, I’m not going to move, she’s going to have to close the gap and that’s up to her. I imagine that this was what AndyJ had in mind that I do, when he said "just tell her".

She’ll be gone for a few. it’ll be interesting when she comes back around.

In my fumbling way, yes.